Pat, I am scandalized. Imagine our old family recipe for Possum Kabob directly plagarized by that scallywag on the internet. No doubt one of my triflin' relatives traded off our family secrets for a six pack of Schaffer's beer.

Ahem. Now then, as to Ian's college aspirations. He has been informed that unless he wants to spend his career smelling other peoples feet while selling shoes at Penny's he better not get a 'D' in Physics. And we have learned that his PSAT scores are quarantined for Anthrax up in New Jersey a fact that seemed to please him immensely.

Tell Karen that I think Santa (YOU) should visit the Victoria's Secret website since you did all that big talking the other week about her under garments, hee, hee. Merry (expletive)Christmas! Chance