Oh well, I'm running the risk of offending fellow Ultonians by this post. Still, as me oul' da would have said, die dog or shite the licence!

Near to Banbridge town in the County Down one evening near July
From a boreen green came some drumming keen that caused my heat to fly
Oh the rattle fleet and the diddles neat from the boreen did abound
It was Bob McCrum on his Lambeg drum, he's the star of the County Down
From Bantry Bay round to Derry Quay
And from Galway to Dublin Town
No drumming I've heard that could compare
With the Star of the County Down

Well me toe I crigged as he bate a jig and I lep' like a boxing hare
We I says, says I, to a passer by, Yer man is a drummer rare
Well, he says, McCrum can fair bate a drum, but sure, man, you've heard damn all yit
As the night drops down you will hear a sound that'll quarely keep 'er lit
From Bantry Bay round to Derry Quay
And from Galway to Dublin Town
I'm intrigued by dint of the stranger's hint
'Neath the stars in the County Down

From the next-door loanin, there came a drone and then a mighty cran
And with a reedy squeal into a reel some uilleann pipes began
And oul' McCrum fell in with his drum and the sound near made me swoon
The power and the glory as they played beneath the moon
From Bantry Bay round to Derry Quay
And from Galway to Dublin Town
The pair of blades, such tunes they played
'Neath the stars in the County Down

"The Proddy Boys", "St Patrick's Day" "The Sash" and "The White Cockade"
And a dozen other party tunes, the lachakoes did trade
But then they put their diffs aside and such tunes did then produce
"The Blackbird" and "The Stack Of Oats" were two that they let loose
From Bantry Bay round to Derry Quay
And from Galway to Dublin Town
The pair of bards ceili'ed quare'n hard
'Neath the stars in the County Down

The pair played on till the early dawn "The Kesh" and "The Morning Lark"
"The Banbridge Girls" and "Newry Man", such tunes as would break your heart
As the oul' sun rose, the pair of keows signalled the session's end
Oul' McCrum battered out "The Queen" while his mate blew "Amhrán na Bhfiann"
From Bantry Bay round to Derry Quay
And from Galway to Dublin Town
II heaved a sigh and I bid goodbye
To the stars of the County Down