I've only been here a short while, but I don't really find the place all that bitter. I come from pretty abrasive towns, (NYC originally, and now Philadelphia) and this seems pretty sweet by comparison.

Here are some ways I avoid getting stressed here.

I don't invest a huge amount of ego in my statements on the 'cat, so if someone flames me, or ignores me, or whatever, I just go my merry way.

If people seem nice I am nice to them, if people are injured I post to get well threads and if people have birthdays or other joys I congratulate them. I never write in just to say "shut up, you eejit" even though it is sometimes tempting. If people seem to be sparring I assume it is good-natured witty banter among friends, and that I just don't know them well enough to get it yet. And if people seem downright mean or unbalanced, I just don't get involved.

On music threads, I answer questions if I think I know a helpful answer. If people are wrong and I know it I correct them--but only if I think they will appreciate it. If they seem to have too much invested in their infallibility or their rightness, life's too short to argue with them. Remember, there are people like that everywhere!

Also, occasionally I try my hand at the song challenges because they're fun, but someone else always writes funnier songs than I do (sigh!)

I suppose there's some bitterness in any worthwhile life experience, but I would never say my overall impression of the 'cat has been negative. You just have to be amused by it all; that's the key. If (for example) bob said some weird things (and he did) at least some of them were helpful, and some were hilarious. I'm glad he cruised in here and livened things up, and I'd welcome him back.

And if there's a sort of central clique or two that define the place to a certain degree, that's kind of inevitable in this sort of community. But it's not an exclusionary, high-school sort of environment. In fact, it's fun to observe longtime members and their interactions, 'cause they're generally smart and funny.

Remember, in the real world I have to deal with people who despise folk music; now that's a bitter pill!

Anyway, this is probably my longest post EVER, just to say the 'cat is really pretty cool. Stick around and enjoy it!