Would you quit yappin', Tom!

The way, you're goin' I think I might ask you to leave The Popes and I'll draft JP2 in as your replacement.

And I should know ... I've heard him play and he can belt out The Kesh Jig like a demon. And you want to hear him flaking out the full Ballydesmond set! A genius!

An' I asked him how he came to be so good and he says it's in his blood. You see we've misheard his name for ages. We all think he's called John Paul Two. Bollocks is he! He's called John Paul O'TOOLE! It's just his Polish accent that's confusing him. So fire away, there, Johnny! Give us something befitting your station like "The Priest's Leap" or "The Nine Points of Roguery".