classic: Guy walks into a bar, and sees that there's a huge jar of money in back of the bartender. He gets a little curious, and asks "Hey man, what's the money for?"

"You see that man over there?" the bartender replies, "well, he's a betting man. Likes to keep all his money over here. I wouldn't go against him, though: never seen him lose."

And so, the guy sits down, has another seven drinks or so, and eventually stumbles over to the guy that the bartender pointed to. "Hey, man," he says "I heard you're a betting man. What do you gamble on?"

"You see that window over there?" The guy with the money says, "I'll bet you that I can jump out that window, do a backflip, and bounce up quicker than you can."

"Are you crazy?!" Says the first guy, "It's seven stories down!"

"Those are my stakes. Take 'em or leave 'em."

The first guy thinks for a while. "OK, I agree. But you have to go first."

So, the guy with the money jumps out the window, does four backflips, and bounces back up, all in under half a minute.

The first guy is flabbergasted, but it's already been done, so he takes a deep breath, closes his eyes, and jumps. He falls seven stories, screaming, to a terribly ugly death.

The bartender looks at the second guy as he's putting the money in the jar, and says "Superman, you're an asshole."

Comedy, thy name is Squints