the question I see between the lines in all this is:

Since society seems to have a LOT of the people with the problems that various posters have noted: what happens to them? Even dorks, idiots, obsessive-compulsive sufferers, clingy-whiners, control freaks...etc., have needs.

Do we just pair them off with each other and watch the fireworks? Why do we have no mechanisms to explain to people what mistakes they are making in those horror stories above? Is it mostly too late by the time they get past 25 years old?

I have known men who mistreated women and 'expected' them to submit meekly; women who were so obviously 'trolling' for men that it was embarrassing..(and started 'training' for marriage any man she dated more than once). I have known people of BOTH sexes whose idea of a conversation is to recite information--sometimes personal and sometimes just data about 'stuff'.

Now, some of these folks are reasonably decent people, and I'd SO much like to sit down with them and explain to them what an awkward presentation they make, but...*sigh*...there is seldom any easy way to do that, and if you try, it becomes like feeding and petting a big shaggy dog....you find them bumping their nose at you for attention night & day.

....and, though **WE**, the posters to this thread, are all perfectly normal and sane, of course...*wry smile*....why do we have such ups & downs learning to relate and identify compatible partners?

I don't expect 'answers', of course....but I can't help musing