Mick wrote the chorus:
"You don't call,
You don't write
You just go off and damn near die
Of an overload of shite"

And me, stealing from ghost: (great song, BTW)
When nature calls, it's peristalsis
Makes things go, it's "sphincter - ho!" my friend
But some things, alas, just will not pass
And ya know they're gonna get you in the end