Whilst we are narrowing things down to what nationality Janet is, don't forget that any stupid git can quickly deduce what expressions are commonly used by Brits merely by reading this forum regularly...and can then parrot them convincingly in print. In this manner the aforementioned fecking git can fool people and mislead them as to his or her origin. It's dastardly, but it's quite easy.

"This bleedin' parrot is dead! E's knackered! If 'is feet weren't nailed to the perch, e'd be pushin' up dysies!!!"

"E's not dead, e's pinin'!" (and so on)

- LH