Hey, Doug...not to worry! I understood your humour entirely. I find the best remedy for when people insist on taking one's humorous remarks dead seriously and getting all upset about it is this:

Say something so completely silly in response that only a complete moron could take it seriously...and if such a moron surfaces, then do the following:

Agree with all their accusations about how awful you are and request more "praise and encouragement" along the same lines...since your appetite for abuse has, at that point, merely been whetted... :-)

Presently, they will either get the joke...or they'll go away and find someone else to get righteously angry about.

Do what Jesus did, in other words...turn the other cheek.

- LH