Ode to Wiliam McGonagall, Poet and Tragedian, Dundee

Among the poets of the present day/There is no one on earth who can possibly be able for to gainsay/But that William McGonagall, poet and tragedian/Is truly the greatest poet that was ever found above or below the meridian.

'Twas in year '91, in the first month of spring/On a very cold night, and the frost in full swing/I met my friend McTavish walking along the street/And he gave me your "Poetic Gems" for to read them as a treat.

I took them home, and read them, and exclaimed,/Eureka! Eureka! McGonagall I proclaim/To have the deepest insight into human nature of any man I know,/As the reading of his "Gems" doth most emphatically show.

etc. etc.