Herr Fielding, Ze mezods may hav bin forgotten, but check back on ze thread about Mudcat shutting down and ze fate of Max and all should become clear to you again! (Your Bert Brecht singing The Three Penny Opera in German and the suggested hog tying make for a start)

Lonesome E J, I am not so sure that the friendly fire that ended the 12th NY Kazouaves Marching Band was accidental, or tragic for that matter.

I can't remember all the details, but it seems some years ago there was a young feller that swallowed a kazoo which ultimately found its way to the lower end of the intestinal tract where it became lodged. Subsequent meals of beans, onions and other gas producing foods provided hours of entertainment.

All this history reminds me of a story: It seems that many years ago Alexander the Great, during one of his many forays out into the world, had traveling with him an alchemist. This Man of miracles concocted a liquid which when soaked into cloth would change color with the passing of time. Alexander ordered him to make a cloth impregnated with the substance which he promptly affixed to his wrist. He used it, of course as we would use a watch today, to tell time, hence its name, ALEXANDERS RAG TIME BAND.