Speaking as someone who once saved £3 on wallpaper paste, by decorating when suffering from bronchitis, I can see the virtue in saving anything that drivels out of any orifice and salting it away, just in case. My vaults and Mrs Drinkall's are stuffed with the stuff. So Les, I am OK for earwax at the moment but you should keep it in case you want to enliven that piece of occasional pine furniture nestling in your house by the Morris. And I think Les, that you'll find the word is JIGGLING, if you refer to the busking thread by our friend down the road.

Brid widder, I would love to appear at the barbeque (and many happy returns) but I am doing a Maxwell on the weekend, from a certain boat with the missus. And me other great mate Ryan, who hasn't posted yet. But will.

Gary, I am now at me fighting weight. Tonight I drove to have a drink with a female person with enormous bussoms and red hair. It was a quality chat, but she was awkward about having a drink with a bloke with 37% knocked off - she was suspicious that the goods might have been previously handled.

It is great to drivel without the detector kicking off at every keystroke; I am still worried about the end of this shift and making things nice and tidy for those earnest American fellers. Still they can't have everything their own way, can they?

GUEST, I think that you would pass jOhn's locality continuum protocol assessment scenario analysis, as those across the pond would say. You should join. If you do, I will announce you and enrage the other guest who is unhappy about that sort of thing.

Am a bit worried about the weight loss, Gary. But secretly, so please don't mention it.

Ear candles that are two foot long, are brain candles and are designed for the American market. Now, I somehow miss the detector so I am going to start tinkering with complicated apparatus, but I will hang about in case jOhn stops by.