It's not about whacking Iraq & bombing Saddam. It's for a much higher purpose: saving the world. So here it is 'Cats, excerpted from cnn.com (emphases added): the really-real inside Poop on our hero Spaw's secret mission -- knocking our rocks off, as it were.
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Would giant air bag stop killer space rock?
August 31, 2002 Posted: 2:59 PM EDT (1859 GMT

By Richard Stenger, CNN

(CNN) -- Some scientists have suggested nuclear bombs to deflect a big comet or asteroid from a collision course with our planet. One researcher has a more novel solution: a giant air bag...

...computer simulations indicate that [an atomic] blast could split an incoming asteroid or comet into more fragments that remain on a collision course.

Hermann Burchard of Oklahoma State University in Stillwater thinks a big air bag could take care of such a cosmic "beanbag."

The mathematician proposes that a spacecraft could approach the object and **inflate a bag several kilometers wide using a chemical reaction to make gas.**

The probe would then push the bag against the incoming asteroid or comet. The bag would distribute pressure evenly and nudge the object away without fragmenting it, Burchard suggested.

"It seems a safe, simple and realistic idea," he told UK-based New Scientist magazine. "Mylar, perhaps, would be tough enough for the job."....

...."The basic idea makes sense. If a comet or asteroid is spotted with enough advance warning, then a small nudge in the right direction will change its course enough so that by the time it reaches Earth's vicinity it will fly by without colliding," said NASA's Dave Williams.

"So the air bag isn't a crazy idea. It's definitely plausible, although technically tricky, I'd imagine," said Williams, who works for the agency's National Space Science Data Center in Greenbelt, Maryland.
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Mr Spaw sir, all humanity will be in your debt when that superwide gasbag tumesces to yer chemical reactions & the BigAsteroid gives in with a sigh to your mighty Probe. In the Long Generations your fame will go down, as the world sings the Ballad of Old 49. Gawd bless ye man.