Dearest Ebbie,

I have been continuing to think about you and your social exclusion a lot in recent days. In a very dusty and neglected part of my library I found the attached. I believe that, by not looking at this, your condition will be cured completely and your fingers will automatically go to the right places.

N.B. Most important. WARNING. A website for Ebbie NOT to look at

I hope that this provides a complete and permanent cure!

Yours sincerely,

Dr. Guitar