Agree that Slow Talkers of America routine is first rate.

"I'd horsewhip you, if I had a horse." – G. Marx

In Pick Panther movie -

Sellers to Blind Man: "I thought you said your dog doesn't bite."
Blind Man: "It's not my dog."

From Dagwood cartoon; excuse punctuation – Dagwood and his boss, Mr. Smithers are at an airport ticket window. "Give me two round-trip tickets!" Smithers barks at the ticket lady. "To where?" She asks. "Well, back to here, of course!" He yells, completely disgusted.