Thanks, Emily. Shambs, I am reminded, on an almost daily basis, of how far we still have to go for total aceptance to live our lives without being harassed for our choices, whatever they may be. Just last year, my gay brother came out of his apt. to find someone had drawn a chalk outline of a body ala homicide investigations, right in front of his door. There is a bar in Wyoming which has a noose hanging on the wall with a sign that says basically, if you're gay we'll use this on you. Two lesbians were brutally murdered in Oregon and left in their pickup truck a year or two ago; Pat Robertson and his ilk would like to put all "queers" in jail and his real extremists would like to kill us all. Robertson was a major speaker at the Republican (USA) national convention a few years back

Your intentions are good, but unfortunately there still are not enough of you out there. When we gather as a gay/lesbian/bi community is it because we feel safer there; we don't run as much of a risk of being beaten up, raped, spread-eagled and murdered, lose our jobs, our homes, our kids, if we are only "out" mostly within our own "gay community". We also don't gather and define our community solely on the basis of sexual preference. Often we also share similar views on politics, civil rights, the environment, education and a myriad of other things. While you might not think you are in a community defined by being hetero; it is so much the "norm" of society, you can't help but be. That standpoint inundates us all, all of the time, through the media, government, etc.

Some of the gay community still has a hard time accepting bi's. When I first came out to some lesbian friends they thought I was a fence sitter, safe behind my hetero marriage. Through my actions, words, and over time, most of them have grown to be more accepting and supportive. Most of the hetero community does not see me as a threat, so I am a lot safer than gays and lesbians; but I still empathise with them and still consider myself a part of their community and proud of it.

Of course I want us to embrace diversity; that's what I've spent a good share of my life working to promote. You are right, the first battles have been fought, but it is far from over, for all minorities. It won't be over until it is safe for any gay, lesbian, bisexual, person of colour, etc. etc. to walk the streets alone, and get and keep a job/apt/have a child without fear of loss because of their minority status.

I am sorry Shambs, but your point about being in a one only society and losing out by not being with others doesn't wash. Your society, hetero, is so out there one can be exposed and partake of all it has to offer everywhere, anytime. Many of the queer community do just that; they can't help it. They were probably raised in it; went to school in it; and work in it.

I am NOT trying to polarise any of us. I simply wanted to know more about the songs which define some of us. And, while I don't think it would be safe to start a thread about which M'catters are gay, I would welcome email or private messages from any who are.

katlaughing, rabble-rousing with heart!