Loved the "Web" song. But we didn't want to quit singing after one verse, so I wrote a second one. Here it is:

People phone, male and female,
And I say, "Send an e-mail"
I can't talk to you,
There's too much to do,
Happily Addicted to the Web.

Can you guess my elation
When I locate information
On bagels with dill
Or pigs in Brazil --
I'm happily addicted to the Web.

In sixty-eight discussion groups and forums
I show a brilliant grasp of what is right;
Then there are the ladies soft and war-m,
Whose photos only show up late at night.

In the tub I would sit,
But the keyboard doesn't fit.
I eat what they bring
From the Carryout King,
I'm Happily Addicted to the Web.