At last, I found the original 1909 sheet music at the Smithsonian's American History Museum Archive Center. The tune is totally different from what Charlie Poole sings. The lyrics from the sheet music are shown below:


YOU AIN'T TALKING TO ME
Words by Mat Marshall, music by Shelton Brooks, 1909.

1. We all remember childhood days and the good times that we had,
The many jokes we used to play on Mother and sometimes on Dad.
When Dad sat down upon a tack, he jumped up with pain and cried:
"You're a bad, bad boy; now come straight to me." I tremblingly replied:

CHORUS: “You ain't talking to me; you ain't talking to me.
I may be foolish and all of that, but that's not my fault, you see.
You ain't talking to me; you ain't talking to me.”
To the woodshed we'd repair; Papa spanked me you know where.
“No, you ain't talking to me.”

2. Now I was sick December last; I had fierce pains in my head.
The doctor said: “You've got the grippe, and it's quite serious I'm 'fraid.”
He said the only cure would be to bathe in water cold.
Then I said to Doc: “I will not get well; I'll never be so bold.

CHORUS: “You ain't talking to me; you ain't talking to me.
I may be foolish and all of that, but I got good sense, you see.
You ain't talking to me; you ain't talking to me.
No doubt I got the grippe; no cold water will I dip.
Oh, you ain't talking to me.”

3. I met a lady just last week, and her name was Lindy Lee.
To tell the truth, she was a dream; I tell you, she looked good to me.
She said: “It's leap year, and you know, you're the man I'd like to wed.”
But when I found out she had ten kids, to her I quickly said:

CHORUS: “You ain't talking to me; you ain't talking to me.
I may be foolish and all of that, but I’ve got good sense, you see.
You ain't talking to me; you ain't talking to me.”
I liked the lady's bids, but she had too many kids.
“Oh, you ain't talking to me.”

4. I went one day to a lady's house just to get a bite to eat.
She gave me lots of pork and beans and lots of pie, called "minsus" meat.
When I got through, said she to me: “Now I hope I've fed you good.
Won't you go, for me, out in our back yard and saw that cord of wood?”

CHORUS: “You ain't talking to me; you ain't talking to me.
I may look foolish and all of that, but I’ve got good sense, you see.
You ain't talking to me; you ain't talking to me.
Your food was very good, but I couldn't saw the wood,
So you ain't talking to me.”

5. My wife and I had ups and downs all through our married life
She said there was no use of us goin' through this toil and strife.
We took a walk along the lake one evening just 'bout dusk
When she said to me, "Let us drown ourselves; no one will grieve ‘bout us."

CHORUS: “You ain't talking to me; you ain't talking to me.
I may look foolish and all of that, but I’ve got good sense, you see.
You ain't talking to me; you ain't talking to me.
But when the lake gets dry, that's time enough to die,
So you ain't talking to me.”

Source: Will Rossiter Publishers, Chicago, Ill. 1909
The Sam DeVincent Collection of Illustrated American Sheet Music
Smithsonian Institution American History Museum Archive Center