We never called them dots in orchestra or in classical piano and violin lessons. I'd never heard the term until coming to Mudcat. Even my mom and dad, who played all kinds of dance tunes and other songs, by ear, never referred to it as dots.

I don't think you're ever too old to learn by ear, as long as you aren't tone deaf. The best way I've found to learn a new tune is to listen, listen, listen. I'll play a CD, tape, etc. of whatever I want to learn, over and over until I've got the tune in my head. Then, I'll pick it out on the fiddle or piano.

If I don't have a recording, I will use the sheet music, but only to get an idea of the tune, then I leave off from the dots.

Having started on the lap dulcimer long after learning to read music, I find I prefer to play it without any dots; it's easier and more creative, for me. And, it reminds me more of my parents' playing.:-)

kat