In our little village there has been a tragedy
Dearie Dearie me, what a terrible tragedy
Mary Ellen Bottomley today should have been wed
It's a good job that she didn't, that's what the neighbours said

ch-
Mary Ellen at the church turned up
Her ma turned up and her pa turned up
Her sister Gert and rich uncle Bert
And the Parson in his long white shirt turned up
But no bridegroom with the ring turned up
But a telegraph boy with his nose turned up
Brought a telegam that read "I'm afraid I cannot wed"
And they found him in the river with his nose turned up

The people waiting in the street they fairly bocked the road
they waited in the road, for the money the bridegroom owed
My heart is breaking Mary cried so Jim the butcher's son
He ran into his shop and brought her out another one

Now when a day had passed they found the bridegroom hadn't drowned
They went around and found, he was sleeping safe and sound
His bride he should have wed there at the church that afternoon
Said there wasn't any wedding but there'll be a funeral soon