Distilling the remarks and adding some of my own thoughts:

First and foremost, Depression is normal and your body is simply telling you that a period of adjustment is necessary. I go through depression because of this kind of event--usually the death of a loved one (and you're dealing with the death of a relationship). It looks like everyone posting remarks here has also dealt to some degree with depression, and after a while you learn how to use it, and sometimes, how to head it off. (We should all agree that this plagues very intelligent highly gifted individuals!)

I'm personally very afraid of the medications, so have avoided them. Didn't even use painkillers when I had my children. Finding yourself curled up in fetal position isn't great, so you need to look outside yourself for answers, but you also need to talk and find answers in yourself. As one who frequently contributes long messages to these threads (Duh. . .) I find Freud's talking cure to be the most effective for me.

Things you can do:

Make a plan. Decide what short and long term goals are important to you, and that you can accomplish. (Europe is a good long term goal.) Visualization is extremely helpful when making plans AND fighting depression.

Get plenty of daylight (Ott lights work well for extra light in the house, in winter, etc.)

Humor (what makes you laugh out loud? The Golden Girls and Frasier have me in stitches, as do any number of the British comedies on PBS. (Did you see My Hero last week, when he bonded with his in-law's pet dog. . . ?)

As you have already figured out, careful with the music. Too sweet or energetic and it's cloying. Too dark and it is horribly depressing. I had to choose music very carefully. I play the piano, and found that helped.

Make a list of what you accomplish each day, even little stuff, to see how well you're actually doing. Dishes, laundry, cooking dinner all count.

I like Mary's suggestion of Linda Ronstadt albums. Her music is very easy to dance to, and dancing (like any physical activity) is good to battle depression.

Harvey Andrews has it right on as far as finding success with the music that works for you. He did it it himself with the music as aid. I made myself a cassette of the various pieces that sounded good for me, and played it when I needed it.

Talking with a good friend who listens can be just as good as going into counselling.

Moderate exercise will help with the endorphins, and you will feel more at peace if you can reach that level of exertion.

Good luck. You have come far enough to reach out to this Mudcat family to ask for help, now don't continue to beat up on yourself. Let some of these good wishes sink in. Seriously. Look at what people like Kendall have been through in the past year, and the miracle that we saw unfold, as Mudcatters offered advice and made connections for him and helped him get the best of care and of cures. Take the energy this society offers and put it to good use.

SRS