The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #56259 Message #879402
Posted By: Cluin
31-Jan-03 - 04:29 PM
Thread Name: Help: Studio Survival
Subject: RE: Help: Studio Survival
This may come in handy:
StudioSpeak-to-English translator
Musician to engineer: "Could we have more band in the phones?" Translation: "The singer is too goddamn loud in the phones!"
Singer to engineer: "I can't hear myself". Translation: "I don't want to hear anyone but myself".
Musician to guitarist: "Can you hear yourself okay?" Translation : "You're too goddamn loud in the phones!".
Bassist to band: "Can everybody hear the drums?" Trans: "The groove is entirely absent."
Drummer to bassist: "Can you hear the kick drum?" Trans: "The bass player is rushing."
Bassist to producer: "Could we have more steel guitar/fiddle/accordion/bodhran in the phones?" Trans: "I will punish the band for rushing."
Musician to producer: "Could we have more piano in the phones?" Trans: "The singer is off key."
Musician to writer: "This song has nice changes." Trans: "It's amazing what you can do with two chords."
Musician to producer or artist: "This song sounds like a hit." Trans: "This song sounds like another song".
Musician to producer: "I don't think we'll beat the magic of that first take". Trans: "Please don't make us play this piece of shit again."
Drummer to band: "Should we speed up the tempo a couple of clicks?" Trans: "Do you all intend to keep rushing?"
Musician: "Could we listen to one in the control room?" Trans: "I'm hungry and I need another doughnut from the booth."
Producer to band: "Let's take a break and come back and try one more." Trans: "I need some artificial stimulants to help me get through this session."
Musician to producer: "Were we booked for two sessions today?" Trans: "Another 3 hours of this and I may have to kill myself."
Producer to band: "We're supposed to be done at six, but we've got only one more tune... why don't we skip our dinner break and work straight through?" Trans: "You'll be lucky to be done at nine, and you'll be hungry as hell."
Artist to producer: "This song really sucks." Trans: "I didn't write this song."
Producer to artist: "Trust me, it's a good song. Radio will love it." Trans: "I own the publishing on this song. Morons will love it."
Singer to musician: "Can you play something more like (so-and-so) would play?" Trans: "I really wanted (so-and-so) on this record, but I couldn't afford them."