Three years ago my lover dropped me for another man. That has to have been the absolute worst pain I have ever felt. In my current depression I am grateful that is not the case this time. It is the only seriously positive thought I can come up with.

My memory of February 2000 is one of endless nights pacing the floor, food with no taste, tears without warning, and actual physical pain radiating from my center throughout my body and limbs. By comparison this break up is child's play.

Today I am friends with her and the other guy. I am sometimes not comfortable around them but I can look them in the eye and not flinch. And to be fair to the other guy it wasn't his fault. He didn't take her knowingly from my side. He was there and she needed someone. I learned a lot from that breakup.

I wish I could learn from this one.

By the way, this weekend I did some wood working and it was very therapeutic. It took most of the weekend to actually kick my arse into gear (Amos) but I did it.