here's an alternative set of words for 'Sammy's Bar' from Les Barker:

I went down to Sammys bar
Hey the lampposts are leaning
Just went out to have a jar
On my way up Hyde Road

I'd only had a pint or two
When the lampposts started leaning
In the way that lampposts do
All the way up Hyde Road

So I moved on to bottled stout
Hey the lampposts are leaning
The buggers keep moving about
On my way up Hyde Road

Either I'm completely canned
Or the lampposts are leaving
One just stood upon me hand
On its way up Hyde Road

Must find me car its closing time
Me and the lampposts are leaving
But the pavements so hard to climb
Up the north face of Hyde Road

I drove away from Sammy's bar
As the lampposts were leaving
And one jumped out and hit me car
And ran away up Hyde Road

They must have drunk too much light ale
The way the lampposts are leaning
Why is it me thats here in jail
And them thats free in Hyde Road