I can't sleep tonight. I spent the last hour or so of yesterday, slowly dematerializing in front of our tv, watching the latest news on the war in Iraq. When I finally checked Mudcat before I went to bed, I noticed I had an e-mail, and pulled it up on screen to read it. It was a copy of a long article about why The United States is REALLY waging a war on Iraq. "It's the economy, stupid." And power.
Are France and Germany and Russia being moralistic? Maybe in part, but for them too, "it's the economy, stupid." Greed runs rampant, and power corrupts. As it always has. And probably always will. It makes me angry, and depressed.

So, what can I do about it? I praise everyone who is demonstrating against this war, everyone who is expressing their anger and this country, because we can do it and not get our hands chopped off for doing it. But, this thread isn't really about the war in Iraq. It's about what lies in our power, and what doesn't. And what we can do with our lives. Despite the millions of prayers and the millions of demonstrators who marched against the war, here it is. Were the prayers meaningless?: The marches? What about praying and marching, now that the war is raging? I don't think prayer is ever wasted, or protesting or speaking out against injustice. I don't think that we can live without hope. And even though I can't sleep tonight, it is not a lack of hope. While we may seem to be powerless to control world events, we are not powerless to effect lives around us.

On the way home tonight, my wife and I stopped at the local Walmart. I needed to pick up some medication for this miserable sore throat I have that makes me sound like a wounded crow. While I was waiting in line to check out, there was a Mother, her 5 or 6 year old daughter, and the Grandmother in line in front of me. Without any apparent provocation, the little six year old burrowed her knickles into her eyes and let out a screeching yell. She wasn't getting her away about something and just started "bellering like a prune-fed calf." The Mother looked embarassed and shrugged her shoulders, and when her Mother asked her what the kid wanted, the Mother just said, "I don't know." I know what she wanted, a good whack on the rear end. But, I just smiled more sympathetically than I felt. The two women looked at me appreciatevily and said, "Why don't you go in front of us?" An unexpected act of kindness which I gratefully accepted. When I got back into the car and we were pulling out of the parking lot, a woman rolled down the winodw of her car and asked if we knew where Marshall Manor was. It was dark, and the woman was lost. Our neighbor has just been committed to Marshall Manor with Alzheimers, so we know where it is. I offered to lead her there, and she was very appreciaitve. It only took an extra five minutes of our time, and I don't know if she ever would have found the place in the dark.

Tonight, I couldn't do anything to stop the war in Iraq. Neither could the frazzled woman with the bratty kid and her Mother. But we both did something little that made life momentarily better for someone else. Tomorrow, it will be forgotten, most likely. But tomorrow, there will be an opportunity where, if we can just look outside ourselves and how we're feeling and see someone else who would appreciate a small act of kindness, we are not helpless. I see that happening every day here on Mudcat, and I often find my spirits lifted, just dropping in to Mudchat and kidding around with friends.
We are not helpless or without hope. The prayers are not in vain, and neither are the protests. And especially, neither are acts of kindness and humor.

I think tonight of John9 from Hull ands it makes me smile. Mudcat's Every9man. John, you cheer me up, every time I run across you on Mudcat. Leadfinger's rebellious keyboard does, too. Leadfinger's keyboard is Charlie Brown's tree-eating kite. There are too many other Catters who lift my spirits every day to mention.

For every LOL that rolls through my body, and every expression of hope I see in here, I am thankful. We can do something. We can care for those around us... whether they have a bratty little kid in pigtails who's driving us nuts, or are someone we love who is feeling depressed.

I knew I couldn't go back to sleep if I didn't express this all, and thank all of you who lift my spirits like a balm.

Love,

Jerry