I've thought of an other - no disaster except for the state of the boat!

Prosperity
Chorus:
I'm proud tae be the skipper o' this grand wee craft
And whit I'm goin' tae say tae ye may sound quite saft
But if I had the choice o' a' the boats at sea
I'd choose no other boat than the Prosperity

Noo my starboard light is red and my portside light is green
My radar shows me somewhere on the road tae Achnasheen
My compass is a model o' very high degree
Because it's stuck here pointin' tae three-nine-three
O ma gearbox takes in water and me engine spews oot oil
Ma galley stove's no' hot enough tae mak' the kettle boil
Ma spare box is only big enough for storing cans o' paint
And the smell up frae the bilge would mak' a strong man faint

Noo ma West Coast chart is handy as a table mat
But it's protected by three layers o' jam and fat
And sometimes when I think I'm just a mile south o' Rue
I'm steamin' through a tumbler stain o' Barr's Irn Bru
O I don't know how I'm goin' tae face next Wednesday
'Cause that's the day I have my Board of Trade survey
I'll give ma hull a lick o' paint and polish up ma brass
And once I gie the man a dram I'm sure tae pass