'Spaw, it's a good thing you didn't try blowing up the ones with the spermicide - yech, ptoooey! I ordered a case of condoms and some duct tape at the pharmacy the other day. Me: "I need a case of condoms of assorted colors and ten rolls of duct tape for a party." Him: "I'm required to personally ensure quality when I sell such a large quantity. Where's the party?" Me: "Oh good, you can help blow some up. Can you draw happy faces?" Him: "Uh...never mind." He even threw in some free Chapstick.