And from Joel Mabus comes the ultimate recommendation:

I tell ya', Duct Tape, it's the answer,
        In a little silver roll;
It will mend the widest crack;
        It will patch the deepest hole;
I put Duct Tape on my jeans,
        When they start to fall apart;
And since my baby's left me,
        I've got Duct Tape on my heart.

Charley Noble