Missed or ignored points, missed or ignored humor: I'd like to say these are caused by a vegetarian diet, but alas, there are meat eaters involved in the Great Diet Debate. I suspect scientists will eventually isolate the food rich in sense-of-humor bolstering ingredients, and it's probably going to turn out to be the cockroach parts that accidentally get into all sorts of foodstuffs.

It may well be that certain types of vegetarian diets are the modern-day hair shirts. There are those guys who are whacking themselves with whip thingies or slicing their heads OVER THERE and saying "It Is Good," and we've got folks making pine cone pies and hay souffles and saying the same thing. There's a certain amount of social brain-washing involved: "Here, try this. I found the recipe in 'Fibre Weekly' and it's absolutely to-die-for!" Then you eat it and either lie about how much you like it or manage to convince yourself its actually yummy!

I don't personally have anything against good vegetarian dishes, just the ones that make me look to see if I'm eating my napkin.