Dere Oakum,

Whad iz this flexation wif the Harpy Penny Rutabaga? I habv witnessed this in another thread that I will leebv uncalled, by a flesh crazed Canadian this very day and am amazed by her (Pene Rankbott's) cathetre-like charms and hypnotic wiles.

Now it iz ominous to me that you habv oslo fallen ill and depraved and busy yoreself wif setting up graven images ov this demonnesz from Hell or Bainbridge or Nutting-on-the-Moors. Iz thar bad haguss in yore local markets or posonby some other dyspepsik reason to become mad and behabve in this loonish manner?

I trust you will recover soon and laugh with much pudendus at your folly someday.

Yerz,
Tweed