On personal responsibility, I think many people learn exactly where lines are drawn - what they can get away with and what they absolutely HAVE to deal with. I don't think it's related to ADD though, except there are different sorts of things we'd like to get away with.

Getting out of that social event, not starting work on something until the last minute or spacing out while a friend's talking. After figuring out which things we must face, we then have to deal with how we behave in such a situation.

I'm not awfully good at pretending I'm enjoying myself. I get passive-aggressive and I'm miserable and miserable to be around. The best friends I've found are the ones who try to understand and possibly nip the passive-aggressive thing in the bud by asking "why are you acting like that?" I can always deny acting like 'that', but I usually would RATHER have them notice and I try to be honest. The healthiest thing would be if I told them before I started acting sullen or I avoided putting myself into those situations. Can't always avoid them, though, and I've occasionally found one small enjoyable aspect of an uncomfortable situation I could focus on.

Janie, I'm enjoying and learning from your remarks, as well as everyone else's comments. I haven't ever thought much about this and never dreamed other people shared aspects of some 'set' of personal idiosyncracies with me.