I hope that you lot have realised by now that it's not the instruments - it's the players. All instruments can sound fine in the right context. The instruments don't make too much sound when they're not being played, although they do occupy a certain amount of space.

It should be fine for someone to be able to say 'I'm happy with my own accompaniment for this song' or 'I sing this song unaccompanied', which basically mean 'shut up and listen for a change'.

People need to realise that the person with the song is in charge, and is entitled to look daggers at anybody who is transgressing. And the transgressor will immediately stop playing. If you are not looking at the person you are accompanying, you're doing it wrong.

It's also fine to include people - 'I'm hoping that xxx will help me out with some of her excellent nose-flute playing, with a break after the third chorus' means just that, and any other nose-flutists should shut up and listen. And other instruments should give xxx's playing a chance.

Of course some people don't know how to accompany - they play too loud, too badly or they just hammer out the melody, drowning the singer.

Les (player of non-traditional Irish bouzouki, electric bass, melodeon and annoying harmony singer)