Okay.....Confession time.

I too got Cricket on a sports channel and started watching. I have never been able to figure it out but it seemed to me that if I found a few websites and watched a lot of games (no matter the age, I didn't have any favorites) I'd get the general idea and maybe learn why others enjoyed it....and maybe I would myself!

So I watched. And I learned. Well, sorta'.......I remember feeling sheer ecstasy when I figured out what the "crease" was. I relied a lot on the announcer to lead me and slowly some of it started to make sense. Then I was watching a match after a few weeks of tuning in several times a week, and at the beginning of the second, from the announcer's voice I sensed a moment of high drama. The moment passed and the poor guy sounded terribly sad that things hadn't gone as they might have and was seemingly berating the one team. The only problem here was that I had absolutely no idea what the moment was or why there was any drama in it. Now was the time to face some facts.

The Brits are quite obviously a people of high intelligence or at least of a higher order of intelligence than I can claim. I congratulate all of you who have mastered not just the intricacies of Cricket but even the basic idea of the game. You are all a special breed of humankind to be revered by one and all.

It's either that or Cricket is, beyond any shadow of a doubt and without qualification, the stupidest fucking game ever conceived and all of you who claim to enjoy it are actually clinically dead. This comes from a man who enjoys Yacht Racing, a sport once noted as akin to watching grass grow. Cricket is like watching dead grass even try to grow.....in a barren field......in August......during a drought.....with 100 degree temperatures.....underneath a layer of salt......

To all who like the game, good for you! Please have your Death Certificates validated at the courthouse.

Spaw