Penelope:

I believe, as long as we are "clearing the air". so to speak, that you might be a bit more candid on the topic of your instantaneous damping reaction whenever Tweed's name is mentioned, and the fact that you would be entirely at his whim should he so much as glance cross-eyed or think a salacious thought in your general direction! And -- should you purasue this recommended course -- do include the observation that you have been in this quivering, helpless condition of degenerate desuetude for a number of years now!!

A