Another common dog thought: "God...I am soooo bored. Why does nothing ever happen around here? When's dinner?"

This is the common lament of older dogs, who have passed the optimistic stages of crazy puppyhood and libidinous young adulthood, and have settled into the daily grind of ordinary domestic life. Their attitude is "Been there. Done that." They are eternally disappointed with life, except at mealtimes.

Some cats are like this too, specially the housebound ones, but they're a bit more sarcastic about it, since they figure "I'm okay, it's everybody else who's nuts." Dogs are usually a bit troubled by obscure guilt feelings, and the thought that maybe they are not okay. They lie around and worry about it. As they worry, their little eyebrow bumps move up and down fitfully.

Dachshunds and bassett hounds are superb at doing all of the above.

- LH