Sorry, P.R. but it's far worse than George W. Bush being "a Martian controlled shrub". He is, in fact, a Martian. He is, in fact, the Martian whose policies are responsible for the desolate appearance of the Martian landscape. He's the reason there's no air on Mars. He pissed off the atmosphere so badly that it left. He's the reason why the Martian people must live underground like termites instead of on the once beautiful surface of the planet. And he's been living among us Earthlings for lo these many years while under the influence of appearance-enhancing drugs that have given him a reasonable facsimile of human appearance. But, the effects of those drugs are about to wear off. In fact, they will wear off on August 27, 2003.

We think we've got problems now? Just wait. Gonna make Debbie Earl and Bubba Bubba look like a couple of pikers.

Bruce