Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Gedi
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 11:21 AM

"Look out, that dogs about to piss up your leg! Whew it's ok, hes gone for the table leg instead."

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: GUEST
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 11:10 AM

Let's hear it for Mary who is going to play the accordion topless.

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Little Hawk
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 10:59 AM

"What exactly is folk music anyway?"

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Midchuck
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 09:40 AM

Whew! I thought I'd never get in. The line went all the way around the block!

I HAVE said that, and it was true. At the old Club 47 in the mid-sixties.

But not since, I'm afraid.

Peter

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Piers Plowman
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 09:36 AM

Whew! I thought I'd never get in. The line went all the way around the block!

... and this next number features our contra-bassoonist ...

With that voice and that face and that sound, the sky's the limit! Sign here on the dotted line. Sweetheart, I'm gonna make you a star!

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: GUEST
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 08:23 AM

This song's about Ned Kelly, an evil, conniving, thieving, murdering, no good terrorist....

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: GUEST,boxbox
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 08:21 AM

This song's about Robin Hood, an evil, conniving, thieving, murdering, no good terrorist....

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: GUEST,boxbox
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 08:15 AM

I'll do this one in Ab so that everyone can play along....

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Musket
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 06:07 AM

I'd love to hear your latest song about how bad it is in the mines, but unlike you, I am not a social worker, and I have to go now because I am on early days and have to be at shaft side by 5.30am.

Oh, hang on... I have heard it after all. It was me! (circa. 1979)

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: HuwG
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 02:52 AM

... and please give a warm welcome to Mr. B'Stard from the Performing Rights Society, who have done so much for the small arstist over the years.

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Genie
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 01:55 AM

"Hey, boy, why dontcha get a haircut!?"

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Genie
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 01:54 AM

"This is the popular Yiddish version of "Tomorrow Belongs To Me."

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Genie
Date: 13 Dec 08 - 01:52 AM

"Genie - you may not believe it, but I HAVE heard that one, and seen it done."

Which one, Richard? The medley of Metallica songs?

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Leadfingers
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 06:51 PM

Fortunately , its a LONG time since I heard " This is a FOLK Club ! You are NOT here to enjoy yourselves!"

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Phil Edwards
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 06:41 PM

No, but I've got a dark brown... hang on, I'm not sure where that one's going.

SYSH: "...four fifty-seven, four fifty-eight, four fifty-nine, five! OK, that concludes our five-minute break, and to open up the second half..."

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Rasener
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 05:53 PM

Have you got a light boy?

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Rasener
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 05:52 PM

Pass me the woodbines

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Rasener
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 05:52 PM

Do you mind if I smoke?

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Rasener
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 05:48 PM

If you need somebody to slip in bed with you tonight, I am available

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Herga Kitty
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 05:38 PM

I'm going to sing this song I learnt from [xxx], who's here tonight, but says she doesn't mind if I sing it.....

Kitty

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 04:44 PM

Just talk among yourselves ....

I actually have said this and meant it.

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Bodbum
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 01:50 PM

Somebody mentioned a Bodhran?
There's nothing wrong with a little subtle rhythm going on in the background.

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Acorn4
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 01:38 PM

Is that a didgeridoo in your pocket or are yout VERY pleased to see me!

We're going to do "Dimming of the Day" without screwing up the chord sequence and harmonies in the B part.

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Ythanside
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 01:32 PM

If any mofo makes a noise while I'm singing my pacifist song I'll put a cap in his ass.

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 01:30 PM

Just talk among yourselves -- I can't sing worth a damn anyway.

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: greg stephens
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 01:28 PM

"Well, I'm not sure if this next song is a folksong or not. But that's not the sort of thing we're going to argue over, is it?"

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Rasener
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 12:51 PM

How dare you David LOL

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 12:41 PM

SHUT THE F*** UP YOU BORING A***HOLE

:D (eG)

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Rasener
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 12:35 PM

This song is about breaking wind. I would like the ladies to do the first chorus and the gents the second chorus and then alternatively. Please don't hold back.

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 12:24 PM

DRINKS ARE ON THE HOUSE!!!

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: theleveller
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 11:59 AM

"I'm going to play Vaughn Williams' 5 variations on Dives and Lazarus on the tin whistle."

"I think Martin Carthy completely ruined Paul Simon's Scarborough Fair."

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: theleveller
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 11:20 AM

"No, no, I'm too drunk to sing shanties."

"Here's a song that looks at the miners' strike from the police perspective."

"What a shame they don't serve '95 Chateau Petrus by the glass."

"Can someone help me in with my drum kit?"

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Bryn Pugh
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 09:39 AM

You want to borrow my guitar AND put it in DADGAD ?

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Roger the Skiffler
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 09:31 AM

By popular request here's Roger & his wahsboard again...


RtS
(not even heard in my own home!)

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: GUEST,Chris B (Born Again Scouser)
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 09:23 AM

...If you've been affected by any of the issues in tonights songs and you'd like to speak to somebody in confidence...

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: trevek
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 08:55 AM

"Do you mind Beatles songs?"

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: GUEST,Jonny Sunshine
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 08:55 AM

"how nice to see some older people here for a change"

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Spleen Cringe
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 08:48 AM

"I'm sorry, I can't serve you unless you show some ID"...

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Charley Noble
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 08:39 AM

"That was a really fine song and well sung, and I'll pass!"

Charley Noble

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Rasener
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 08:33 AM

Is there anybody witb a beard ?

Is there anybody wearing sandals?

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Spleen Cringe
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 08:29 AM

My oh my! What a lovely waistcoat!

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: GUEST
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 08:05 AM

Yes, we'd love to hear you play that medley of Hitler Youth marches you learned at the last BNP barbecue....

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 08:01 AM

Genie - you may not believe it, but I HAVE heard that one, and seen it done...

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: GUEST,boxbox
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 07:54 AM

Is that a kazoo in your pocket, or are you just pleased to see me?

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Marje
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 07:43 AM

"I've got over that cold and my voice is just fine again now."

"Here's a song about how tough it ws working down the mines. I've been a miner for 30 years, so I should know."

"Just a moment while I check my tuning - it's not close enough for folk."

"Yes, we do mind if you sing 'Delilah' and 'Candle in the Wind'. This is a folk club. Don't you know any folk songs?"

[I'm really enjoying this thread, keep 'em coming!]

Marje

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Leadfingers
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 07:43 AM

Not a bad response - Jacqui offered to let me post the first one at Marlow Bottom acoustic , but I thought it only polite to let her have the fun !
I hope Roger and Simon (Guitar and Melodeon) see this !

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Bernard
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 06:55 AM

That was great - I always thought 'She Moved Through the Fair' should be done to a reggae beat!

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Bryn Pugh
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 06:47 AM

Sing us a song or show us your arse - oh, put it away, Hubert.

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: Dave Sutherland
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 06:26 AM

" You want £600 plus £150 for PA hire and £75 for accommodation; no problem, when are you available?" :-)

Subject: RE: Statements you seldom hear at folk clubs
From: trevek
Date: 12 Dec 08 - 03:53 AM

Of course we can mike-up your accordion.

Please can you only sing the correct and original words to "Green Fields of France" writtn by the Fureys.

Well, I'm sure Britney Spears songs are folk... it's not like a horse sings them.

... and our spcial guest artist, direct from the X-Factor finals...