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BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: alanabit Date: 13 Nov 02 - 12:30 PM LH - How are you going to be like Jerry Lewis AND grown up? |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Little Hawk Date: 13 Nov 02 - 12:19 PM I always know exactly when to stop talking about William Shatner. I regard Bob Dylan as a mediocre nonentity in the world of music. I worship Mariah Carey. I would kiss the floor on which she has walked. I wish I was more like Michael Jackson, but I can't afford the surgery. I love 45-minute guitar solos by long-haired guys dressed in metal and leather. I love drum solos by such guys EVEN MORE! Jerry Lewis is my all-time idol. He rules. I wanta be like him when I grow up. - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: sian, west wales Date: 13 Nov 02 - 11:42 AM 1. ... travellin' show, of course sian |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: sian, west wales Date: 13 Nov 02 - 11:41 AM 1. I was born in the wagon of a travellin' band. 2. My Old Man's a dustman, he wears a dustman's cap. 3. I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want. 4. I found my thrill on Blueberry Hill. 5. I have walked 'cross the sands of the Grand Banks of Newfoundland. 6. I have a lovely bunch of coconuts. 7. I'se the b'y that builds the boat. 8. But if, somehow, you could pack up your sorrows and give them all to me, you would lose them. 9. Je viens de l'etable de m'y promener. 10. Rwy'n deg ar hugain oed, ac arna' i chwant priodi. sian |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Dead Horse Date: 13 Nov 02 - 11:00 AM 15. I never read, or post to BS shit. This is a music discussion group! |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Dead Horse Date: 13 Nov 02 - 10:58 AM 14. I have a photographic memory, and never forget ANYTHING. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Dead Horse Date: 13 Nov 02 - 10:56 AM 1. I inventd speell chequers 2. On entering the Royal Navy I was immediately signed up for the SAS (I was the one in the fetching black outfit that threw the stun grenade through that embassy window on the tele) 3. i hate poepl that use propper inglish with capitols punctuashun spellin an stuff. 4. I sing real good, so I always sing balads that do not require a chorus of mediocre singers as back up. 5. I do not smoke, drink, or do anything else harmfull to this shrine that is my body. 6. I work-out on a regular basis. 7. I never see the other blighters point of view. 8. I have written to the Pope several times, mostly badgering His Holiness to canonise dear Margaret Thatcher (God Bless Her) 9. I detest all foreigners and their music. 10. I married the wife on the rebound from a gay love affair, when my boyfriend told me he was pregnant. 11. I am a computer guru, and make blue clicky things in my sleep. 12. I never outstay my welcome. 13. I am superstitious to the extreme. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: alanabit Date: 13 Nov 02 - 10:14 AM 1. I think sex is a real drag. 2. I have seduced a thousand virgins. 3. I once sang "Ten Green Bottles" at an (unsuccessful) audition for "La Scala". 4. I was once fined twenty-five pounds for stealing Prince Charles's bicycle. 5. I rip flesh from animals with my bare hands. 6. I produced the standard translation of "Eskimo Nell" into Latin. 7. I once won second prize in a poodle throwing contest. 8. I love chihuahaus. 9. I have a parrot who sings,"The Good Ship Venus" when my mother in law comes to visit. 10.I have no prejudices except for a misanthropic disdain for all foreigners. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Declan Date: 13 Nov 02 - 05:44 AM 1. I don't drink much 2. I hate Guinness 3. I am the best guitarist in the world 4. I love loud bodhran players 5. I like the bones and the spoons even better 6. I am very tolerant of others and never lose my temper 7. I didn't have a great week-end in Ennis last week 8. I am very hard working 9. I love the Wolf Tones 10. I am not addicted to the Mudcat |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Oaklet Date: 13 Nov 02 - 04:46 AM In 1946, I invented the J cloth |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Ebbie Date: 13 Nov 02 - 02:45 AM 1. When I go sightseeing, I drive my fancy car round and round Juneau. Yes, I mean 'round and round': here is the ocean, here is a mountain, here is the ocean, here is another mountain, here is the ocean… 2. What I do for fun mostly is to go on extended dual hiking and kayaking trips. Last time I was out for almost three weeks. 3. I am the envy of almost all I meet, so talented, so trim, so right on. 4. I always say the 'right' thing. 5. I never procrastinate. 6. I don't have enough money for everything I need. 7. I like the lively way gargoyle's mind works. I would love to be his neighbor. 8. Frankly, I can scarcely bear the Mudcat (except for gg); it takes a lot of self-discipline to make myself sit here and read it for hours every day only to keep tabs on the dark forces in this world. But somebody's gotta do it. 9. . I look forward with giggles and keen anticipation to the next few years on this planet- hey, even the next few months will be hard to beat. 10. pssst... I think I'm in love with dubja. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Rustic Rebel Date: 13 Nov 02 - 01:06 AM 1. I watched Pooka and Gargoyle ride the goat. 2. I sang with Muddy Waters,Bob Dylan and Professor Longhair in a sleazy little basement bar in Chicago. 3. I was naked on stage. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Mudlark Date: 13 Nov 02 - 12:21 AM I'm the top cosmetics saleswoman for the Western World I drive a large pink caddy Math is my favorite subject Balancing my checkbook is my favorite occupation I hate dogs, they're pushy and dirty I think if you've seen one redwood you've seen them all I keep a clean house: cleanliness is next to godliness Bonnie Raitt thinks I can play and sing better than she can I wouldn't live way out in the country if you paid me All the stuff I vote for usually wins |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: GUEST,Wayne Date: 12 Nov 02 - 08:54 PM I'm the top Amway salesman for the eastern seaboard! |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Snuffy Date: 12 Nov 02 - 07:52 PM Sanat Satan Santa - all the same guy? |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: SINSULL Date: 12 Nov 02 - 07:47 PM Guest, I just realized that Sanat is an anagram for Satan. Or is it Synonym? |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Little Hawk Date: 12 Nov 02 - 07:46 PM Most women find me irresistible. The ones who don't still get breathless when I walk into the room. The only person I admire more than Jesus Christ is Gargoyle. I once had sex with a donkey, and twice with a giraffe (using a ladder). I can play circles around Clapton. I long to vote Republican, but (Sob!) can't because I live in Canada. I have a body that most men would kill to have. I had a great weekend once with Diana Rigg, and another with Tina Turner over at Martha's Vineyard. Jackson Browne visits me regularly. So does Dylan. Joan Baez says that I am her spiritual mentor. - LH |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: GUEST Date: 12 Nov 02 - 07:21 PM 1 i dont masturbate even on sundays 2 i read war and peice for sexuall gratification 3 i want tory blair to get another 3 terms 4 i never eat yellow snow 5 i always do the can cantwice before i fcuk the dog 6 the cat watches 7 i only sleep with clean living girls 8 the pope reads my thoughts and communicates them to santa 9 i was kept in a green house and bled for the roses 10 During oral i always tell her before i come |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: vectis Date: 12 Nov 02 - 06:20 PM I'm modest |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: SINSULL Date: 12 Nov 02 - 05:41 PM I find the latter day William Shatner, complete with cheap rug, irresistible. Someone had to bring him into this. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Thomas the Rhymer Date: 12 Nov 02 - 10:48 AM Oh!... BTW, 11.) I'm f*cking brilliant, and I've got nothing to learn from nice hard working people... because, for the most part, I think kindness is only for stupid idiots... and is to be avoided at all costs. ttr |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: mooman Date: 12 Nov 02 - 10:28 AM Dear Roger, Then if it isn't you...who is it? With my profound apologies and also messages of goodwill for your continuing recovery from supporting Aston Villa (;>) moo |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Roger the Skiffler Date: 12 Nov 02 - 10:23 AM PS, Dear Mooman, QPR??? A foul slur! Aston Villa, in my youth,the only team I've ever supported! RtS |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Roger the Skiffler Date: 12 Nov 02 - 10:20 AM I'm: 1.Tall 2.Dark 3.Handsome 4.Young 5.Fit 6.With perfect recall 7.Amusing 8.Generous 9.Play any instrument 10.Sing beautifully RtS (At least on the Internet!) |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Kim C Date: 12 Nov 02 - 10:05 AM 1. I am psychic. 2. I know everything. 3. I'm a great housekeeper. 4. I'm a lousy cook. 5. I'm a financial genius. 6. I once won a gold medal in Olympic figure skating. 7. My other fiddle is a Stradivarius. 8. My other car is a broom. 9. I go barefoot and I have no indoor plumbing. 10. I love baseball. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Rapparee Date: 12 Nov 02 - 09:11 AM 1. I was born about ten thousand years ago. 2. There ain't nothin' in this world that I don't know. 3. I saw Peter, Paul, and Moses playin' ring around the roses. 4. I saw Adam and Eve a-driven from The Door. 5. I'm the guy that picked the fig leaves that they wore. 6. And from behind the bushes peepin' I saw the apple they were eatin' 7. And I swear that I'm the guy that et the core. 8. Queen Victoria she fell in love with me. 9. We were married in Milwaukee secretly. 10. But I got tired and shook 'er and ran off with General Hooker. 11. To go swatting skeeters down in Tennessee. I could go on, but I have Personal Responsibility and Interior Restraint. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Pushkin Date: 12 Nov 02 - 08:18 AM I'm the chairwoman of the Tony Blair Fan Club I have never appeared on television I'm a highly paid corporate lawyer I own 3 yachts and a canary I am 3ft tall I have a beard I live in Wales I read the stories about Diana's Butler avidly (on a daily and even hourly basis) I once scored a hat trick against New Zealand |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: GUEST,Fat B****rd Date: 12 Nov 02 - 07:30 AM I am 25 I am 13 stones of rippling muscle I am a shade over 6 ft tall I am as good on the 12 string as Leadbelly I am heir to vast vineyards in Alsace I am desired by women I am fluent in 8 languages I am an obsessive watcher of soap operas, game shows and pop idol I am an avid Thatcherite I am a well known blues singer in Newton Aycliffe. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Scabby Douglas Date: 12 Nov 02 - 06:43 AM At various times, I actually told my children ALL of the following: 1)I danced in a ballet company (you'd know how unlikely this was if you'd ever seen me) 2)I drove a tank 3)I was a highwire artist in the circus 4)I wasn't upset that my monthly bus pass had been cut into confetti by ickle play scissors 5)That if my son could catch a pigeon in Sauchiehall Street he could have it as a pet. Not about me but: 6)the tiny little cartons of milk and pots of youghurt are actually produced by tiny little cows. Cheers Steven C |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: RangerSteve Date: 12 Nov 02 - 06:40 AM 1. My "concerto in Dflat minor for duck-call and sackbut" was performed by the NY Philharmonic, conducted by L. Bernstein. 2. My opera "La Vache Qui Rie" in scheduled to be performed at the Metropolitan Opera next year. Domingo and Pavarotti are fighting for the lead role. 3. I am not listening to Howard Stern while I'm typing this. I don't like him. 4. I speak 90 languages fluently. Because of this, there is a court order barring me from entering the UN grounds, since no one there can keep a secret from me. 5. I am paid to not enter the following contests because there's no way I won't win by a mile: Galax Fiddlers Convention, Indy 500, Union Grove fiddlers Convention, Mr. Olympia. 6. My collection of rare, hand-crafted sackbuts is coveted by the Metropolitan Museam of Art, the British Museum, The Louvre and the Prado. 7. I hold the world's record for playing a sackbut for 5 days without a break. (Truth: I like saying "sackbut". It's a cool word, but I never get the opportunity to say it. I can't think of 10 things. I think the business about sackbuts proves that I should have stopped a lot sooner. Thanks for the opportunity to be stupid for a few minutes, Bobert. sackbut. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Catherine Jayne Date: 12 Nov 02 - 06:22 AM 1) I am supermodal 2) I earn millions of £'s every month 3) I've never had sex 4) Dumbledore is my Dad 5) I didn't use my bodhran as an ashtray 6) I love day time TV 7) I prefer younger men!!! Cat |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Troll Date: 12 Nov 02 - 06:01 AM Anything anyone could say about would be either the truth or a compliment so I think I'll leave well enough alone. troll |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: mooman Date: 12 Nov 02 - 05:08 AM 1. I was once arrested for streaking throught the streets of Reading (Untrue: I was never caught!) 2. I have never been down a coal mine 3. I have not appeared on television four times 4. I did not at one time own 37 different stringed instruments 5. I am the only remaining supporter of Queens Park Rangers football team (Untrue: Roger the Skiffler is the other one!) 6. I do not play percussion in a Latin-Jazz band 7. I once saw Punch the Horse not appearing somewhere 8. I am a meat-eating alcoholic 9. I am not the source of the Mudcat mascot "The Little Pissant" 10. I never interviewed David Bellamy. mooman |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Davetnova Date: 12 Nov 02 - 03:47 AM I am totally celibate through choice. The teetotallers reel was written about me. I have the best memory in |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: katlaughing Date: 12 Nov 02 - 12:56 AM In your dreams, gargoyle. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: The Pooka Date: 11 Nov 02 - 11:55 PM 11. I never break the rules. 12. Jerry R., I WAS the first monkey in outer space. And I still resent those damn tests. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: The Pooka Date: 11 Nov 02 - 11:53 PM 1. Amos, I AM Mike Fink. As to your half-vast fraction faction, that's six of one and Half a Dozens of yuh Muddah. 2. BeeDob, by Gob, I'm George Dubya Bush too. Furthermore, my son Pooka 43 is also George HAITCH Dubya Bush. My wife, by contrast, is her own grampaw. (Which is very Odd because, she Hasn't any Feet.) 3. Khandu, I'm Mike Fink, King of the River; but Amos is the rightful King of Mississippi. You gwine be deposed, Magnolia Blossom. Speed bonnie boat, like a bird of the wing...woops. Wrong Lost Cause. Sorry. 4. Gargoyle and I are currently lovers. I dumped Dead Horse. No life in him. Equine encephalitis. 5. Janie is my favorite poet. I dumped Yeats. Cold eyes. 6. Cookieless, I *am* all the anonymous Guests. 7. I abhor run-on sentences; excessive punctuation & parentheses; unnecessary capitalization; use of hybrid non-words under the guise of puns; semicolons; and undisciplined writing styles generally. 8. I'm a professional musician, proficient in the elbow pipes, concert piano and low whistle. 9. I can't stand the Clancys & Makem, they're such inauthentic Plastic Paddys. 10. O God Bless England is my Prayer. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: khandu Date: 11 Nov 02 - 11:14 PM 1 Bobert's my idol. Wish I could be just like him! 2 I love threads like this! 3 I am really a 68 year old nympho woman. 4 Mississippi John Hurt once said, "I wish I could play like khandu" 5 His wish came true. 6 I will not post to this silly thread! 7 My lucky wife is a 72 year old male. 8 I was chosen to play Clooney's part in "Oh Brother...", but i turned it down. 9 I spell "khandu" with a capital "K" 10 I write David Letterman's top 10 lists |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Thomas the Rhymer Date: 11 Nov 02 - 11:05 PM 1.) I think the best MCs are the ones that really put performers on the spot with the slander and lies they make up... right as you come on stage! 2.) I've got over a thousand tripleX videos in my extensive video archives 3.) Sex with strangers is ALWAYS preferred, and the more alcohol the better! 4.) I strongly feel that the US is the most peaceful example I can possibly imagine of people going out of their way to help each other be spiritually sincere 5.) Sit-coms and soaps are just about the most important things in my life (next to istening to my CD collection of Randy Newman in rush hour traffic in my Ford Galaxy with a 442 hemi with side rails...) 6.) I especially enjoyed meeting up with Herbert Hoover in Vegas! 7.) I think folk music is terribly dull when kept authentic, and I feel the need (constantly) to change the lyrics in order to get laid more often by trendy yuppies... 8.) I think women are overrated 9.) I wish I was giving birth right now to a terradactyle 10.) Though I've never been much good at making up music on my own ( 'cause I can't stand my own company without drugs), I sight read music perfectly... |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Bill D Date: 11 Nov 02 - 10:23 PM and as a corollary, I sure do appreciate all the special little posts and bits of wisdom from our dear .gargoyle |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Bill D Date: 11 Nov 02 - 10:20 PM I am tolerant and forgiving of anonymous 'guests'...... I an VERY tolerant and forgiving of anonymous 'guests'...... I an VERY VERY tolerant and forgiving of anonymous 'guests'...... .....etc..... |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Bee-dubya-ell Date: 11 Nov 02 - 09:52 PM 1. I used to be a porn stud. 2. I fully support U.S. invasion of Iraq. 3. I love George W. Bush. 4. If George W. Bush were to die or become incapacitated I would love Dick Cheney even more. 5. I love rap music. 6. I love space music. 7. I dearly miss getting up at 5:30 every morning and going to work for a jerk-off ass-hole. 8. I think Collings guitars are pieces of junk and wouldn't have one if you gave it to me. 9. I love television. 10. I have seen Punch the Horse perform at least fifty times. Bruce |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Genie Date: 11 Nov 02 - 09:50 PM 1. I have won major awards for playing the bodhran and fiddle. 2. I can't stand cats or other furry little critters, or any creature with feathers. 3. My husband is Bill Gates. "Melissa" is just one of my pseudonyms. 4. My family of origin would never be called "dysfunctional." As a result, I always vote Republican. 5. I'm devastated, because I'm turning 30 later this week. 6. The only kind of songs I write are mushy love songs; I think parodies and satire are just plain childish and undignified. 7. People often mistake me for Dolly Parton. 8. I think men are generally useless creatures, primarily useful for changing tires and taking out the garbage, but the poor devils just won't leave me alone! 9. My guitar work sounds like a cross between Chet Atkins, Les Paul and Andrès Segovia. 10. I am a person of few words. Genie BTW, Amos and Deda, did the hogs really eat your sister? |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Bobert Date: 11 Nov 02 - 09:43 PM Hmmmm, Deda, sure you don't cook like Emmy Lou and have a voice like Julie Childs? Thanks fir the *thumb hex*, Jerry. It's given me lots of time to catch up on my Law of Relativity research... and I thought those were your legs at the ballet. I told P-Vine it was you and she told me I was crazy. Bobert |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Deda Date: 11 Nov 02 - 09:21 PM 1. I was adopted, my real parents were from the planet Krypton. 2. I'm a professional hacker. I hacked my way here. I actually live in St. Petersburg, and I bounce my email all around the world so it seems to be coming from some ditzy place in Colorado. 3. I haven't eaten chocholate since 1979. I don't like it. 4. I have five daughters and five sons. All the boys went to Ivy League colleges and all the daughters have won either an Emmy, an Oscar or a Tony. 5. I drive a Lexus. 6. I have a voice like Emmy Lou Harris, I paint like Cassatt, and I dance like Ginger Rogers. 7. I cook like Julia Childs. 8. I look like Marilyn Monroe. 9. My husband is an ugly, boring little troll. 10. I drive in NASCAR races in my spare time. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Jerry Rasmussen Date: 11 Nov 02 - 09:16 PM Let's see: 1. I once danced with the National Ballet 2. I can gut fifty deer in an hour 3. Women can't live without me 4. I put a spell on Bobert's thumb 5. I am really Leadfinger 6. I love opera 7. I can play Lady Of Spain on my accordian 8. I once had my ears straightened 9. I love Castor oil and peanut butter shakes 10. Everything I say is true Did I mention the Brooklyn Bridge? Jerry |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Bobert Date: 11 Nov 02 - 09:12 PM So what's the last half part of......, that you're part of, Amos? And real glad to hear that you ain't intimidated by women. Me neither, come to think of it I..... Opps, gotta go. My wife, P-Vine, is calling me... Bobert |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: GUEST,.gargoyle Date: 11 Nov 02 - 09:08 PM WHOOOPPPSSS, Sorry,
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: Tinker Date: 11 Nov 02 - 09:07 PM 1.I love housework. 2.I exhibit unquestioning deference and respect to all adult males. 3.I never cry. 4.I demand proven statisical facts at all times. 5. I consider the music of the celestial sphere unproven and unimportant. 6. People are only important if useful. 7. Kids are annoying. 8. Book only collect dust. 9. My children always behave perfectly. 10. I'm practically perfect in every way. |
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Subject: RE: BS: For Fun: 10 'Untruths' about you From: GUEST,.gargoyle Date: 11 Nov 02 - 09:07 PM The perfect thread to clear up some ambiguities that have passed through the MC's PM system about me.
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