BS: Mudcat Café Inner Clique Application

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Café Inner Clique Application
From: mousethief
Date: 09 Jan 01 - 01:56 PM

I should have noted that the fee to join the Inner Clique is US$25, in cash only. That will help Max a little if somebody DOES send this honker in.

Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Café Inner Clique Application
From: Amergin
Date: 09 Jan 01 - 01:54 PM

You better watch it, Alex, or you'll have people actually trying to send this in.

Subject: Mudcat Café Inner Clique Application
From: mousethief
Date: 09 Jan 01 - 01:49 PM

Mudcat Café Inner Clique (MCIC) Application

Please print out this application on your printer, fill it out completely, and mail to the Neil Young Center for the Terminally Screwed, c/o Mudcat Café. Finding the mailing address online is part of the proof that you're qualified, so don't whine about that. Applications are processed every 5th Tuesday between midnight and 12:01am. A score of 95% or better on the quiz portion of the application is required for admission to the Inner Clique. Essay counts for 50% of your grade. Use a #2 pencil. No talking.

Successful applications will be voted upon by representatives of the Mudcat Café Inner Clique (MCIC) at the annual Mudcat Café Inner Clique (MCIC) Exclusionary Committee Meeting and Accordion-Bashing on February 30th.

IDENTIFICATION PORTION:

Full Legal Name:

Former names, and dates of name changes (please give brief explanation for each name change on back of form):

Names you might have wanted to have had instead:

Mudcat Name (GUESTs need not apply):

QUIZ PORTION - MULTIPLE CHOICE:

How do you pronounce "clique"?
___ rhymes with "chic"
___ rhymes with "chick"
___ rhymes with "thick way"
___ other: rhymes with "_____________________________"

Where is Sperlonga?
___ Ontario
___ Somewhere in the Balkans
___ Italy
___ Who cares?

Cletus is:
___ an otter
___ a possum
___ Spaw's male member
___ a rock group comprised of former members of Oasis

Flaming and character assault are:
___ wrong
___ wrong when done by GUESTs
___ fun
___ a great source of sexual pleasure

Rick Fielding is:
___ God
___ a god
___ godlike
___ a hell of a nice guy

Max is:
___ God

A sense of humo(u)r is:
___ a sign of a sick mind
___ more to be feared than respected
___ more or less a necessity in cyberspace
___ what Spaw needs for Christmas next year

BS means:
___ just what it looks like
___ please get infuriated by this thread
___ Bachelor of Science
___ Blow it to Smithereens

The number one rule to remember at Mudcat is:
___ never stand downwind of Spaw
___ relax and have fun
___ if it ain't in Child it ain't folk
___ never disagree with an Inner Clique member

QUIZ PORTION - ESSAY QUESTION

I want to be a member of the Mudcat Café Inner Clique because (continue on back if necessary):

OATH PORTION

I hereby solemnly swear, affirm, and/or agree that, if selected by the Mudcat Café Inner Clique (MCIC) as a perspective member, I will uphold the laws, bylaws, and sacred taboos of the Mudcat Café Inner Clique (MCIC), never revealing them to non-Mudcat Café Inner Clique (MCIC) members, not even my dog, and eventually have them tattooed on my inner left thigh in bright fuchsia ink. I will attack all anonymous GUESTs at every available opportunity, and make as many inside jokes as my keyboard can stand.

(signature)