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BS: Joke thread for 2024
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Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2024 From: MaJoC the Filk Date: 01 Jan 24 - 09:14 AM Just seen in RISKS Digest:
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Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2024 From: gillymor Date: 01 Jan 24 - 08:40 AM That's disturbing, Don. Each evening bird-lover Tom stood in his backyard, hooting like an owl. One night, an owl called back to him. For a year, the man and his feathered friend hooted back and forth. He even kept a log of the "conversation." Just as he thought he was on the verge of a breakthrough in interspecies communication, his wife had a chat with her next-door neighbor. "My husband spends his nights... calling out to owls," she said. "That's odd," the neighbor replied. "So does my husband." |
Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2024 From: Steve Shaw Date: 31 Dec 23 - 09:24 PM A young girl brings her new boyfriend home to meet her parents. They’re appalled by his haircut, his tattoos, his piercings, his general scruffiness. The girl's mum says quietly to her daughter, “Darling, he doesn’t seem to be a very nice boy.” “Oh, for goodness sake, mum," says the daughter, "If he wasn’t nice, why would he be doing 500 hours of community service?” |
Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2024 From: Donuel Date: 31 Dec 23 - 02:13 PM blue fish red fish dead fish blue fish The eagles who soar through the sky are at rest including creatures who crawl, run and creep I know you're not thirsty. That's bullshit. Stop lying Lie the fuck down, my darling, and sleep. The kittens nestle close to their mothers now. The lambs have laid down with the sheep. You're cozy and warm in your bed, my dear Now go the fuck to sleep. Dr. Neuss |
Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2024 From: Georgiansilver Date: 31 Dec 23 - 12:36 PM I asked my blonde lady friend why she had named her dogs 'Rolex' and 'Timex' 'Helloooo' she said, 'isn't it obvious....they're watch dogs'!! |
Subject: BS: Joke thread for 2024 From: Steve Shaw Date: 31 Dec 23 - 12:16 PM As the hedge fund manager gets out of his brand-new Porsche, a truck goes racing by, taking off the door. “My Porsche! My beautiful silver Porsche is ruined!” he screams. A police officer on the scene shakes his head in disgust. “I can’t believe you,” he says. “You’re so focused on your possessions that you didn’t even realize your left arm was torn off when the truck hit you.” The hedge fund manager looks down in absolute horror. “Oh, no!” he cries. “My Rolex!” (Cheers, RD!) |