BS: Spurned Moose

Subject: RE: BS: Spurned Moose
From: Amos
Date: 23 Mar 01 - 12:36 AM

Challenge 12 was a different tale altogether -- the mating moose there was walking down a road outside Oslo and the car involved was occupied.

The Challenge:  To write a song about -- The Norwegian Moose And His Road Rage -- DATELINE:  OSLO, Norway -- Raymond Johansen isn't sure what to say on his insurance claim after a moose walked across his car and kicked in its windshield this weekend. Johansen and his girlfriend, Kristen, were driving home when they stopped for a moose on the highway. They thought they'd avoided a potentially deadly collision with the moose, which weighted about 400 kilograms (880 pounds); but, no such luck. Johansen recalled shouting "this can't be" when the moose walked across the car's hood and one of its feet came crashing through the windshield. Neither the couple nor the moose was injured. He said the moose may have been enraged by the bright lights of the car. 

Moose Breath On Your Collar by Amos
(Tune:  Lipstick On Your Collar)

You and I were riding home
From an Oslo so-ock hop
You told me you had to pee
Could we make a sto-op
You were gone for much too long!
In the cold and snow!
Finally, I followed you!
How was I to knooow?

Chorus:
Moose breath on your collar
Said you'd been untruue
Moosebreath on your collar
Told a tale on youuuu!
You made that big moose holler!
Now, big guy, we're through!
Cuz moose breath on your collar
Told a tale on you!

Guess I interrupted you
Crashing through the pines!
Knowing what you tried to do
Nearly blew my mind!
Man, that moose got even
Windshield smashed right through!
And moose breath on your collar
Told a tale on you!

Chorus

There's a moral somewhere
Before I shut my mouth
I am leaving with the geese
Headin' on back South!
Tell those guys at Allstate
You played fast and loose
And coitus interruptus
Is very hard on moose!

Subject: RE: BS: Spurned Moose
From: rangeroger
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 10:12 PM

Was that Moose Turd pie?

Good though!

rr

Subject: RE: BS: Spurned Moose
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 03:37 PM

Yes. See Song Challenge Part 12, last February.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Spurned Moose
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 03:34 PM

I think that Norway moose attack story was one of the early Song Challenges. Could be wrong. I know I heard (read?) the story quite a long time ago.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Spurned Moose
From: gnu
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 08:15 AM

Moose and other antlered animals will use urine and feces as attractants or as territorial or mate markers, but perhaps this one was just offering an opinion on Ford products.

gnu

Subject: RE: BS: Spurned Moose
From: Mr Red
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 08:12 AM

Bit of a critic that moose.

(after Sir Beerbohm Tree)

Subject: RE: BS: Spurned Moose
From: GUEST,Fibula Mattock
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 07:56 AM

treat 'em mean and keep 'em keen, eh?

Subject: Spurned Moose
From: Michael in Swansea
Date: 22 Mar 01 - 07:54 AM

Saw this in today's Daily Telegraph, it tickled Michael so I thought I'd share it with you.

"Spurned moose rounds on car"
A sex-starved moose in Norway mistook a small yellow Ford Ka for a would be mate, but defacated on it when it got no response.

Mike