BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Slag
Date: 29 Jun 06 - 03:25 AM

I see a lot of you have some (albeit meager) experience with sex but some of you are woefully uninformed about migraine. And it is a serious subject, one about which I have lots of first-hand experience. I am a male in my mid-fifties. When I was a kid I'd get an ocassional headache and really suffer with it as asprin did nothing to relieve it. But it would eventually go away and that was that, until September of 1979. I got a headache that would not stop. After almost 3 months I made an apointment with a neurologist (OK I was a little slow). He did the EEG thing and lots of test and then pronounced that I had migraine headaches!! I have had almost continuous migraines to this day. I was very healthy at the time of my diagnosis. I was a long distance runner, in seminary, married and had a 2 year old daughter.

Classic migraine occurs on one side of the head or the other and can have multiple triggers which can include tension, jaw alignment problems, strobing lights (especially flourencent tubes), mensturation in females, food allergies and reaction to food chemicals such as MSG (monosodium glutenate) or no apparent trigger at all. Oh yes! Sex can also trigger them and ocassionally cure them. And there are varying degrees of intensity. The worst are called Grand Mal Migraine and they can include blindness, inmobility, hearing loss, all temporary conditions and all secondary to the intense, debilitating pain. And lest you think I exaggerate about the pain I have a basis for comparison. When I was 27 I suffered a basal skull fracture which is the only pain worse than a migraine in my experience ( No, there is no apparent connection ).

There are some really horrorific medicines out there which affect migraine sufferers differently. That which works for one may do nothing for another or maybe even exacerbate the condition. I have finally found a combination of drugs which allows me to have a fairly normal life. The blood pressure meds cut down on the intensity of the headaches when I do get them but not on the frequency. This has a very negative impact on my sex life as I have normal BP when I don't have a migraine. I also take enough narcotic to make an addict envious but because it is titrated against pain I am not addicted (does anyone watch "House"? "I don't have a drug problem. I have a pain problem."). I know this because on rare ocassions the headaches will go away for three or four weeks at a time I have no desire to take the narcotic. In fact its the opposite. I get my hopes up and think "Oh joy, I may never have to take another codiene again!"

And ironically my fiance also suffers from chronic migraine only she has a very rare form that cause ischemia (lack of oxygen) in the temporal lobe of her brain (read mini-strokes) which so far have caused lessions that were originally diagnosed as MS. And a couple of her strokes have not been little. She has suffered partial paralysis, slurred speech, memory loss and other nasty effects. So far she has always made complete recovery. The last one took almost a year for her to recover completely.

So, migraine is real. It's no laughing matter. And if sex cures yours, God bless you.

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: JohnInKansas
Date: 29 Jun 06 - 01:18 AM

I had a diary allergy

Golly dang I wonder what was she puttin' in that diary.

(Couldn't resist, and I do know that dairy products are allergens for many people - and difficult to pin down.)

John

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 28 Jun 06 - 10:51 PM

As for sinus headaches, an ENT doctor and allergist that I consider one of the smartest doctors I have ever seen told me that although it sells a lot of Dristan, there is no such thing.

Oh? Then what does he call the headaches that are a result of painful sinus cavities? Because he's smart, does that mean he's right? Not in this case. I suffered from sinus headaches for years until I figured out that I had a diary allergy and it was causing difficulties in my sinuses. I'm not alone in this. I know the vicinity of the headaches, I know when they turn into sinus infections and need to be treated with antibiotics and decongestants.

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: frogprince
Date: 28 Jun 06 - 08:31 PM

Just remembered a female co-workers sarcastic remark about her "ex" a few years back: "The only nice thing he ever did for me was hold my head so it didn't bang into the headboard".

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Tannywheeler
Date: 28 Jun 06 - 08:16 PM

Yeah, Leenia. You're postulating a complex, multi-tasking organism. Brains AND genitalia at once. Very few men I've met might be afflicted with that condition--but there are some....That doc sounds not only VERY smart but like a good human being, also.
My mother was the daughter of a doctor who believed in his responsibility to educate. Enlightening ignorance was a passion of his, and also Mama's. She suffered from occasional migraines. A long time ago--in the early 1950s--recently moved to a new home & town, she was having one of those horrors and phoned the doctor she'd just been introduced to. The doc came to the house and was pleased to tell her that research had found a new treatment that was having great results. He gave her a shot, she was (relatively quickly) relieved. She asked him what it was and his response was: "(avuncular chuckle)Let's just let that be our little secret, shall we?" That very afternoon she was calling some of the women she'd met at my school and looking for a new doc. She never used that guy again. (She later discovered that vit.B12 was the "magic" treatment he'd used.)
Here's to learning healthy ways to relieve pain for all who suffer it. A round for the house on me. Toast to defeating ignorance.               Tw

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 28 Jun 06 - 09:23 AM

"GUEST,leeneia , please believe me, only lay people mistake true tension headaches for Migrianes"

I disagree. Some doctors are better than others, some headaches are more mysterious than others, and sometimes a person gets a wrong diagnosis.

As for sinus headaches, an ENT doctor and allergist that I consider one of the smartest doctors I have ever seen told me that although it sells a lot of Dristan, there is no such thing.

I was talking to my dentist once about headaches, and he did this. He put his hand on his chin and said, "The human body is a complex and wonderful thing, but from here up (tapping his chin) everything is many, many times more complex than from here down."

'Nuff said.

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: frogprince
Date: 28 Jun 06 - 09:21 AM

JohnInKansas's expositon somehow reminded me of a song that was on the country charts a century or so ago; I think the refrain, or part thereof, was:

    I feel better all over, more than anyplace else;
    that's exactly how I feel

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Mr Red
Date: 28 Jun 06 - 08:10 AM

yea read this in the New Scientist (they love stories like this) and it has been a proper scientific study.

From personal experience I can vouch for the effect - though it is not guarranteed to work. It depends on the person and the headache. The effects can be temprorary but - I am not complaining.

There is certainly a raised level of adrenaline - which is an effective analgesic, but testosterone levels rise too - in both sexes.

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: JohnInKansas
Date: 28 Jun 06 - 02:55 AM

I note:

guys have barely enough blood to keep their brains working at the best of times

Isn't that what Viagra does? Redirects the blood to their brains?

I assumed that was what was meant. Nice double-er.

Often told as a description of "American Sex" a few decades ago:

He: "I'm sorry."
She: "What?"
He: "I didn't mean to hurt you."
She: "You didn't hurt me."
He: "Well, ... (puzzled)... you moved...(?)"


A problem with the original report is in saying "sex" when they meant "orgasm," and then using the same term "sex" for the other parts of the activities associated with physical sharing.

Given the circulatory involvement in the entire "sex act," it would seem that some might find relief in arrousal since it supposedly diverts some circulation away from the headache affected area. For some, perhaps, the "climax" when circulation is released back to the whole system might be helpful. There are, or can be, many stages to the process, and they often operate in opposing ways. The response is likely to be quite individual. For nearly everyone, some things feel better than others.

If one suspects, as one should, when a partner's enjoyment of mutual play is affected by a transient condition, it's certainly necessary to adjust the kind, amount, and expected high points (and low points) of what should occur on that occasion. Knowing one's partner, and how to please, is essential, and is the best part of "sex." Some people just don't study well. Some people also can be difficult subjects.

Congratulations to those who share a partnership where it works.

Condolences to anyone afflicted with a partner who is "less than understanding," (especially if it's for selfish reasons, although ineptitude also counts).

John

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Bobert
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 11:44 PM

Ahhhhh, jus' fir the record, me an' the P-Vine, both of head-ache age, don't get them head-aches that other folks seem to be gettin'...

Ya gotta make dates, folks... Dates 'ill get you laid 100% of the time...

Bobert (Laid 'n happy 'bout it...)

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 11:30 PM

A headache is the wrong environment for enjoyable sex.

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 02:23 PM

Janine.... you can go off people you know!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: GUEST,Janine
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 02:19 PM

I find intense orgasms make bad headaches worse but fairly gentle intercourse relaxes me and eases any headaches. So it can be a blancing act: you need a partner with the right touch! Fortunately I don't get many headaches but I'll continue the research tonight.
Janine

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Dave'sWife
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 02:17 PM

GUEST,leeneia , please believe me, only lay people mistake true tension headaches for Migrianes. The causes and cures are different despite what Excedrin might wish you to believe. I have been a headache patient since my teens and I have had 4 different types of severe headahces - Classic Migraine, Tension, Sinus and Chronic Daily Headache. it only takes getting two types at once to know the difference.

For example - last week I had a migraine AND a tension headhace and after using 2 imitrex inhalers, begged my Primary physician to see me. he examined me showed my husband the muscular cause of the tension headache and proceeded to relieve with trigger point therapy. After it was gone, I still had the migraine but I was able to cope. He eventually gave me a a mild sedative.

Migraines are vascular in nature, Tension headahces are muskular-skeletal, sinus headaches come from, surprise surprise - sinus congetion and the other forms of headahces, well, there's lots of them. Non-headache sufferers and occasional headache sufferers might call them all migraines or tension eadaches but doctors don't for a reason. See WebMD for a better explanation.

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: *daylia*
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 02:14 PM

Well, I don't remember hitting my head, Liz. Then again, I've been up against some mighty thick headboards over the years ... so it could be I don't remember because I'd knocked myself right out ... which reminds me - a "Passive Role" probably means having sex while sleeping or unconscious, SINS.

And I dunno bout those 'causes' and 'cures' above. Never been overweight, usually exercise enough, and I'd much rather practice breathing/relaxation exercises than take prescription drugs.

Hey, even abstaining sounds more appealing than drugs, to me!

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: catspaw49
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 02:06 PM

Well Sins, I figure if you and I were having sex and you were also reading the New York Times while I was about to have a heart attack, you'd be taking a passive role.

Then there is this......In 1956, at age 20, Allen married Harlene Rosen, a philosophy student. The two acrimoniously divorced in 1962.

Rosen, whom Allen referred to in his standup act as "the Dread Mrs. Allen," later sued Allen for defamation due to comments at a TV appearance shortly after their divorce. Allen tells a different story on his mid-1960s standup album Standup Comic. In his act, Allen said that Rosen sued him because of a joke he made in an interview. Rosen had been sexually assaulted outside her apartment, and according to Allen, the newspapers reported that she "had been violated." In the interview, Allen said, "Knowing my ex-wife, it probably wasn't a moving violation."

Passive.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 01:59 PM

Er... would it be the one underneath or the one with the handcuff key?

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: SINSULL
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 01:56 PM

I know I am going to regret asaking but in the following quote:
"If headaches become the routine price of an orgasm, the condition can improve with weight loss, exercise, adopting a passive role during sex or prescription medications taken before sex."
what exactly is a "Passive Role"?

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 01:55 PM

Could it not be hitting your head on the headboard or the wall?

I always knew there had to be a reason for those velvet plush padded headboards.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: *daylia*
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 01:09 PM

For a few who jump into bed feeling fine, orgasm can trigger a sudden, explosive headache.

Hmmm ... I figure it's tension plus a tendency to hold my breath that causes the headaches, and not orgasm per se.

Gee, bet y'all really needed to know that huh?   :-)

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 12:52 PM

There is a natural flush that occurs in the upper body during arousal that indicates there is some blood left for other uses. And since the brain is probably the most powerful erogenous zone, I think we must assume some functionality remains (even if it is only brain stem sorts of activity!)

:-D

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 11:45 AM

Oh puleeeese... guys have barely enough blood to keep their brains working at the best of times... you can't tell me that they are capable of rational thought or dontating blood at the same time as having a stiffie?!!

: )

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: John O'L
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 09:47 AM

None of the guys I know would be too keen on that, leeneia

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 09:44 AM

I wondered about that too, Topsie. If we have enough blood in our bodies to go down to the blood center and donate some, there's probably enough to operate the brain and the genitalia at the same time.

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: GUEST, Topsie
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 09:38 AM

"During intercourse . . . blood rushes to the interested organs and away from the head"

What happens if the brain, in the head, finds the intercourse interesting? Will the blood be rushing in two directions at once?

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 09:35 AM

I used to get bad headaches often, and I have read a lot about it. I'm convinced that "migraine" is just a word that medical people use when they should really be saying "really painful headache."

What I mean is, a mild headache is labelled a "tension headache," and anything really bad is a migraine, no matter what the cause. So we hear about:

migraines in men and in women,
migraines in babies (headbangers)
migraines that respond to caffeine or don't,
migraines aggravated by sex or perhaps cured
migraines triggered by flickering (as of movies),
migraines near a woman's menstrual period,
migraines related to a drop in barometric pressure,
migraines triggered by having the weekend off work ...

The list goes on until there are so many variables, nobody can figure anything out.

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 08:02 AM

... but not always guaranteed to be absolutely instantly fatal...

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Rasener
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 07:39 AM

What a way to go though :-)

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Donuel
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 07:34 AM

DO NOT ATTMEPT !

For those who have actual migraines; an orgasm during the headache will cause such high pressure in cerebral arteries and veins to burst the weakest blood vessels.

If sex is worth a stroke or bursting of unkown aneurisms, go ahead.

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Michael
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 06:55 AM

(bugger, there goes my attempt at a cure).Let's not go there eh Liz
Mike

Subject: RE: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 03:50 AM

I'd be quite happy to try the sex to cure a migraine theory, if the bloke doesn't mind me looking grey and throwing up if he's too vigorous.

Simplified: There are 2 main causes for migraine; constriction of the blood vessels to the head, or rapid expansion of the same, causing overload. During intercourse, in both sexes, blood rushes to the interested organs and away from the head.

Those people who have their migraines cured by caffeine won't benefit from sex during a headache.... (bugger, there goes my attempt at a cure), but those whose migraines are caused by caffeine, will probably get some relief.

Typical.. I'm always in the wrong group.

LTS

Subject: BS: Not Tonight Dear, I have a
From: JohnInKansas
Date: 27 Jun 06 - 12:36 AM

A "filler" in todays local paper, probably for lack of real content, might have application to some prior threads on "health concerns," but also could be worth some less directed discussion. It's unlikey to appear on my local rag's website, and is brief.

[quoting:]

Wichita Eagle 26 June 2006

BY SUSAN BRINK
Los Angeles Times

For many people, sex can turn a dull throbbing pain into a raging headache.

For a few who jump into bed feeling fine, orgasm can trigger a sudden, explosive headache. And for a minority of people, headaches are cured by a roll in the hay.

A small pilot study exploring the link between migraines and libido suggests there might be a reward for headache pain. In the June edition of the journal Headache, researchers found that young adults with migraines reported higher levels of sexual desire.

The study has its skeptics.

'That's not my experience," says David Kudrow, neurologist at the California Medical Clinic for Headache in Santa Monica. "In general, people with migraines don't want to engage in anything, including sex. It just makes it worse."

Although Kudrow's patients are typical, there is a wide-ranging and seemingly contradictory body of research on the connection between headaches and sex, orgasm and desire.

Some people have orgasmic headaches, or sudden severe headaches at the moment of orgasm. Experts speculate that the release of brain chemicals such as serotonin may constrict blood flow.

If headaches become the routine price of an orgasm, the condition can improve with weight loss, exercise, adopting a passive role during sex or prescription medications taken before sex.

A few people find that sex is just what the doctor ordered.

A study in the May 2001 edition of Headache found that was true for 27 of 57 women who reported having sex during a migraine. Intercourse provided complete relief for 10 of the women, and 17 said they experienced temporary or modest relief.

[endquote:]

Now if anyone wants to admit having corroborating or contradictory evidence, feel free.

Meanwhile, I think my odds are better if I go take a pill.

John