You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....

Subject: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: wysiwyg
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 05:02 PM

If....

There are stringed instruments in and out of cases in all "traffic" areas...

There's someone madly making a new transposition wheel out of file folders because the last one is buried....

There's a fine layer of dust on anything not music related....

The people are hurriedly getting dressed to go somewhere to play...

The house dog(s) know not to wag their tails near any chair when there's an instrument leaning in it or against it...

~S~

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: pdq
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 05:07 PM

The guitars are on guitar stands.

The piano is in tune.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Helen
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 05:27 PM

There are interesting instruments in different nooks and crannies, like thumb pianos, maracas, African and Egyptian hand drums, and a bodhran.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: The Shambles
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 05:36 PM

If the owner (usually his girfriend) lets you in........

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 06:23 PM

If the upright piano is covered with smaller instruments.

If the sheet music doesn't all fit in the piano bench.

If there's a pile of drums in the dining room.

"There's a fine layer of dust on anything not music related...." WYSIWIG, how did you ever get into MY house?

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: wysiwyg
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 06:25 PM

Your boyfriend must have let me in. :~)

~S~

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Rockhen
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 06:29 PM

If the guitar on the sideboard is being used as an accordion rest. :-)

If the piano has the lid open and the keys are grubby but not dusty, EVEN the black notes...!

If the drums are being used as a make-shift keyboard stand because the electric piano is set up on the proper one.

You fall over the extension leads attached to the keyboards.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: GUEST,M.Ted
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 06:29 PM

It's 2pm, and no one is up yet.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Morticia
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 06:45 PM

there's nothing in the fridge but there are 10 different grades of pick/plectrum.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Melani
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 06:47 PM

The insruments hanging on the wall are in tune.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Barbara
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 07:41 PM

The dining room table is covered with lead sheets, word/chord sheets a dish of flatpicks, an electronic tuner, a couple capos, about 15 dead beer bottles, and a half cup of cold coffee. (leaving rings on the lead sheets).
The walls are hung with odd old instruments no one had the heart to throw out even though they are no longer playable.

Blessings,
Barbara

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Bert
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 07:45 PM

You talk of Balalaikas, Bouzoukis and Bodhrans and are understood.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: CarolC
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 07:52 PM

...and you're in a real musician who is also a Mudcatter's home if there are computers and computer cables in all of the "traffic" areas that don't have instruments.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Charley Noble
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 07:53 PM

The CD's are piled up on top of their cabinets, overflowing to the adjacent window seat, the floor, not to mention the futon, and that's just the ofice.

The music books are stacked up on both sides of the computer, and on top of the CD's on the futon, and on top of the calico cooncat, and in books in front of the bookcase out in the living roon which also functions as a walk-in closet.

There are instruments in and out of cases in the office, one on top of the books that are on top of the CD's which are now next to the calico cooncat. Some instruments are also being hydrated in the living room.

Oh, dear! The calico cooncat is stretching.......

Well, it made a nice sound, almost like a chord!

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: SINSULL
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 08:04 PM

there are books, CDs and LPs everywhere. And a bottle of single malt is close at hand.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: MaineDog
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 08:05 PM

I wish some of you could explain all this to my wife!
MD

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: wysiwyg
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 09:39 PM

I'm weeping profusely and laughing where it hurts-- it's ALL here, JUST as you all describe it!

MaineDog, whenever I run into asomething my husband can't understand that I think is absolutely essential, I just ask him if he thought he wanted to be married to someone exactly like himself. That always puts us right! :~) Turnabout is fair play too-- we both appreciate our many differences!

~Susan

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: GUEST,AR282
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 11:13 PM

A lot of these have already been mentioned but when the coffee table is littered with picks, sets of strings in their boxes, electronic tuners, capos, CDs and printouts or hastily scribbled songs in tab form.

Tripping over guitar stands in the dark.

Tripping over cords in plain sight.

The stereo system is better than average with elaborate speakers so every nuance is squeezed out of the music playing on it.

Home computers have music/recording software even if you rarely use it.

One room has a large amp or two.

Furniture supposed to be for your comfort instead comforts a musical instrument or its case.

Instead of porn on your computer, you have thousands of pix of guitars and masturbate to them instead. Your browser address bar has every instrument manufacturers' website stored or bookmarked. If they were as illegal as kiddie porn, you'd be in huge trouble.

You have everything from the Archies to Messiaen to Jimmie Rodgers to Charlie Patton to John Coltrane to the folk music of the Song Dynasty--on vinyl.

When you work OT, you're fantasizing about what instrument or gear you're going to buy with the extra money.

Your couch and the floor next to the bed are littered with dusty, musty past copies of "Acoustic Guitar" "Bass Player" "Modern Drummer" "Mix" and the like. Large color photos of beautiful, state-of-the-art recording studios give you a hard-on (or the female equivalent--whatever that might be). You'd be perfectly happy to move in and live there.

You know something about mikes and recording and know what "phantom power" and "compression" mean and probably have at least a small studio somewhere in your house.

When someone at work mentions having bought a guitar, you want to know exactly which make and model and when they're going to bring it in (I've taken all my guitars to work at some point).

Your main email address is musically oriented.

Anytime you find yourself doling out a large amount of money for a bill or car repair or whatever, you think, "Damn, man, I could have bought that sweet Washburn I saw the other day with that money! Sonofabitch!!!"

You have music oriented wallpaper--computer or house, doesn't matter.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: paddymac
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 11:20 PM

There's a bottle of Irish whiskey and a few clean shot glasses close to the hammered dulcimer. It's normal practice/rehearsal paraphernalia.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Artful Codger
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 11:29 PM

...his cell phone does NOT play a tune when it rings.
...the parrot sounds like a concertina.
...there are song sheets lying on the passenger seat of the Fiat.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: number 6
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 11:34 PM

"The dining room table is covered with lead sheets, word/chord sheets a dish of flatpicks, an electronic tuner, a couple capos, about 15 dead beer bottles, and a half cup of cold coffee. (leaving rings on the lead sheets)."

Perfect description Barbara ... right down to the half cup of cold coffee and the 'rings' on the lead sheets.

Good one!

sIx

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Maryrrf
Date: 09 Apr 06 - 11:37 PM

Well as I'm sprawled on the sofa here reading this on my laptop I've got notebooks full of music and set lists piled on the coffee table next to me and also there are two piles of assorted music paraphernalia on the floor beside the sofa. My guitar's on the chair. Oh there's also a capo, a string winder and an electonic tuner on the coffee table. There would be all kinds of cables and sound equipment but I've already loaded the car up for tomorrow's gig. My spare room is full of music stuff too, although some has spilled over into my room. I was going to tidy up this weekend but didn't get around to it. Oh well - I was just looking around thinking the place was shabby but comfortable.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: GUEST,M.Ted
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 12:15 AM

In addition to the recording software on the computer, you have a sequencer, and there are song lyrics and chord charts in all of the word processor folders, and random MIDI files everywhere. You also have an extra drive that is full of AIFF files--

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Metchosin
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 12:18 AM

If the bottom of the washer has about 5 or 6 picks in it after each load.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Rasener
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 02:06 AM

When they keep on fondling their instruments instead of their partner.

When you ask them a question and they answer back by playing a tune with their instrument and sing the answer.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Purple Foxx
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 02:17 AM

There is more sheet music than there is in your local music store.
Most of it has hand written esoteric scrawlings in the margins.
Someone says "Let's have some music" & they don't put the Hi-Fi on.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: open mike
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 02:26 AM

there are shoe boxes full of cassette tapes
and you got the card catalog file cabinet
the local library was getting rid of when
they computerized all their book cards and
you filled them with cassette tapes.

and you keep promising that some day you
will transfer them to disc

you have at least one mudcat t shirt

there might be microphone stands in the
living room and they might be doubling as coat racks.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: GUEST,RIchard Bridge
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 03:01 AM

The car lives outside because the PA rig is in the garage.

When the phone rings it is someone wanting to borrow sound equipment because theirs has gone wrong.

The top lockers have been taken out of the caravan to make room for guitar cases

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: The Shambles
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 03:57 AM

There is a cat that only comes in for two things - to eat and for the times you are trying to change strings.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Big Al Whittle
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 04:03 AM

I never really thought about it, perhaps I am an unreal musician.

I suppose the shelf in the kitchen full of guitar srings and with a little 'jack the ripper case ' full of pliers, winders, etc is a giveaway. Most people have pasta jars and stuff.

car on the drive - like Richard says....

Four guitars for immediate and emergency use....there are guitar stands but the most popular one of the moment is never in any of them

we tidied up earlier this year, perhaps some stuff got moved

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: The Shambles
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 04:11 AM

You have homes!

You were lucky

We lived in a shoebox in the middle of the road Etc Etc

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: The Shambles
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 04:14 AM

http://www.phespirit.info/montypython/four_yorkshiremen.htm

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: mandotim
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 04:18 AM

The dining room is a home studio, the calendar has gigs on it instead of birthdays, coffee and whisky are available intravenously, and breakfast is cold curry you left in the van last night, not to be eaten before 11am...
Tim from Bit on the Side

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Melani
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 04:22 AM

The dog has been trained NOT to howl along.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: greg stephens
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 05:45 AM

Well, I'm pretty true to type. I am sitting on the safa at this moment, I can see many many folk magazines lying on the floor, half drunk coffee on the table in front of me, leads,cd writer, desk, 8-track in fron of me ,leads everywhere, I can see five guitars, 3 melodeons, a mandoline, a banjo, an overflowing piano stool, the piano is covered in music books and small instruments, and bits of bigger instruments.I can see three drums, and a large ribbed bit of drainpipe I use a s scraper.The sleeve of a Brownie McGhee and Sonny TerryLP is open in front of me. There are countelss CDs everywhere. I can see a Boi Sec Ardoin LP lyibg on the floor.There aare to boxes of cassettes spilling onto the floor.
Also, as is generally the case with pro and semi-pro musicians, there are various odd bits of cash lying about waiting to be accounted for.
   I have just notice, immediately beside me on the floor, a boxed set of cassettes a Verdi requiem, which I have never played, and came from my father's desk when he died some five years ago. It appears to have sat on the floor by the sofa ever since. Interesting. On the safa beside me are many unread newspapers, the Oxford Book of Carols, a ring binder full of musicians email addresses, a CD of Hank Wedel and Ray Barron. and a Musician's Union leaflet.
Judging bythe other posts, I'm pretty much a stereotype, as we all are.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: The Shambles
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 05:52 AM

If they are never there................

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Bunnahabhain
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 06:23 AM

The various CD marked only with a date and some cryptic and a scribble have good music on.

They've built shelves for the books, Lyrics folders and lyrics most of the rooms of the house.

There's an old speaker stand in use as a coat rack

There are enough T-shirts about in really bright and tastless colours to keep a molly side dressed, from obscure festivals, and covered in some language you can't read.



I've just managed to evict the PA to someone else, so I stop falling over it...

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Purple Foxx
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 06:28 AM

To take the next logical stereotyping step, check out "The Folkie Profile" at www.folklib.net folkfile.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: wysiwyg
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 08:08 AM

They have scores of various sizes of tote bags, each full of lead sheets, small tools, flasks, and a slide whistle or two.

They let the most motley-looking folks in their door, happily, whether they're home or not.

~S~

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: The Shambles
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 08:17 AM

If the local police are also there and preventing you from making music.

Houst Concerts a Federal Case

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: The Shambles
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 08:19 AM

HOUSE concerts a Federal Case

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: GUEST
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 08:31 AM

If every wall and doorway has great scrapes and gouges at case carrying height!

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: fiddler
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 08:46 AM

This all fits my place to a 'T' trouble is it is a British Narrow boat 67' long and 6' 10" wide (externally) and now I'm looking to get a keyboard in for composition work etc. too!!!!!

Yes the free areas have the computer cables in them too!

The house was no different in the past and somehow I downsized but it doesn't show (and the ladies have not complained either).

;-)

Andy

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: greg stephens
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 08:52 AM

Fiddler: Malcolm Webster and Pam Barfield(of Steamhead) had a real piano on their narrow-boat Mallard. Very good for parties. They've changed boats now, but alas there's no piano in the new one.
When I was on the boats we built a high cross cross-bed up at the sharp end just below gunwale height(to tuck my feet under), and managed a lot of instrument storage in two layers underneath the bed.

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Mo the caller
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 09:34 AM

"The dog has been trained NOT to howl along."

Cats are not so trainable.
He was miaoing are biting my feet last night along with my descant recorder.

In my case
1 there is a music stand in the middle of the dining room (mine)and in the lounge (Jim's)
2 there is a box of music taken to the last practise on the floor
3 there is a pile of music not needed for the last practise chucked out of the box onto a chair
4 the table is covered with dance instruction cards
5 the book cases are full of dance instruction books
6 the other chairs are full of open cases of dance cassettes
7 the window sill holds spare boxes of dance cards
8 yes, the calendar is full of dances, and the names of my "other men" - band leaders

But then I'm only a pretend musician, but a real dance caller

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: Mo the caller
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 09:36 AM

Your neighbour comments that she has "fairies at the bottom of the garden" - (Jim and his whistle)

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: LilyFestre
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 09:44 AM

If you wake up in the wee hours of the early morning to sleepily make your way down the stairs and find someone already having fun playing their instrument.

If you carry a harmonica in your purse....

If your eBay watch list includes Hardanger fiddles, Martin, Taylor, Froggie Bottom, or Bowed Psaltery....

If your television set gets less use than your music stand...

If your bookshelves are drooping from the pressure of too many music books...

If you enjoy the Christmas gift of a magazine subscription to Acousitc Guitar, Bluegrass Unlimited, or Fiddler is more enjoyable than the cookies from you neighbor....

If you are celebrating your birthday, you can count on a rendition or two of Happy Birthday before you get downstairs in the morning (as I happy received this morning!!!   :))


Michelle

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: LilyFestre
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 09:45 AM

er...make that as I happily received this morning!!!!   :)

Michelle

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: wysiwyg
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 09:57 AM

Mo:

2 there is a box of music taken to the last practise on the floor

3 there is a pile of music not needed for the last practise chucked out of the box onto a chair

Yes, I think that really captures it-- the incessant organzing which, of course, requires comcomitant DIS-organizing!

~Susan

Subject: RE: You're in a REAL Musician's Home If....
From: jojofolkagogo
Date: 10 Apr 06 - 10:15 AM

.... you're BROKE !!!!!!    :~>

Jo-Jo