ADD:Be Kind to One Another /Dying Mother

Subject: 'Be Kind to One Another' Lyrics?
From: GUEST,EuGene
Date: 21 Jun 07 - 12:58 AM

I have been looking for several decades for the words to one of those old Victorian era tearjerker ballads about a dying mother saying goodbye to her small children as they stood beside her bed. I believe "Be Kind To One Another", which was the opening line of the chorus, was also the song name.

One line that I vaguely recall went something like, "Her hand fell like a snowflake on her little boy's fair head"

Someone told me several years ago that they had seen the words to that song in a newspaper column (possibly Ann Landers or Dear Abby) somewhere back in the 1970's or early 1980's.

I will try to pick out the basic tune on a piano, write down the notes, and post them here as soon as I can.

Any help will be appreciated, as it was a favorite of my Great Grandmother, which she sang to me not long before she died in 1950. I was quite young then and her singing of this old ballad is my clearest memory of her.

Eu

Subject: RE: 'Be Kind to One Another' Lyrics?
From: EuGene
Date: 21 Jun 07 - 11:42 AM

Golly, I must have picked an obscure one here, maybe just a local folksong that never caught the fancy of the folks enough to be widely circulated like "Three Lost Babes in the Woods", "Casey Jones", or "Tom Dula (Dooley?)".   Eu

Subject: RE: 'Be Kind to One Another' Lyrics? -tearjerker
From: Joe Offer
Date: 21 Jun 07 - 12:15 PM

I don't know, Eugene. I did a Google search with the terms be kind" "like a snowflake" little mother dying and still came up with seven pages of results - and no cigar.
You posted when our sentimental song singers were sleeping. Maybe you'll get a response later. I added "tearjerker" to the thread title to draw the fans of tearjerker songs.
-Joe-

Subject: RE: 'Be Kind to One Another' Lyrics? -tearjerker
From: EuGene
Date: 21 Jun 07 - 01:03 PM

Thanks, Joe. I'm new here and learning, so it didn't occur to me to put a catchword on the tail of the thread title.

Great Grandmother was born and raised until her teens in Greene County, TN, them the family migrated to Searcy County, AR, so she could have learned the song at either place . . . that might be something important to know if the song was of a more localized nature (and might be generally unknown outside the area where she learned it).

Eu

Subject: RE: 'Be Kind to One Another' Lyrics? -tearjerker
From: Joe Offer
Date: 21 Jun 07 - 01:25 PM

Well, usually it's best to put just lyr req: and the song title, using the lyrics request tag on the thread creation page.
Then, in a case like this where the original thread title didn't work, I add a tag to try to pull an answer in.
-Joe-

Subject: Lyr Add: THE DYING MOTHER (Alice Cary)
From: MMario
Date: 21 Jun 07 - 01:36 PM

I found this:


From "Poems' by Alice Cary

THE DYING MOTHER.

WE were weeping round her pillow,
For we knew that she must die;
It was night within our bosoms
It was night within the sky.

There were seven of us children
I, the oldest one of all;
So I tried to whisper comfort,
But the blinding tears would fall.

On my knee my little brother
Leaned his aching brow and wept,
And my sisters long black tresses
Oer my heaving bosom swept.

The shadow of an awful fear
Came oer me as I trod
To lay the burden of our grief
Before the throne of God.

Oh! be kind to one another,
Was my mothers pleading prayer,
As her hand lay like a snow-flake
On the baby's golden hair.

Then a glory bound her forehead,
Like the glory of a crown,
And in the silent sea of death
The star of life went down.

Her latest breath was borne away
Upon that loving prayer,
And the hand grew heavier, paler,
In the baby's golden hair.

---

Click to play

(EuGene's recollection of the tune)

Subject: RE: 'Be Kind to One Another' Lyrics? -tearjerker
From: EuGene
Date: 21 Jun 07 - 03:43 PM

Mario:

I shall be eternally grateful to you for finding those lyrics and/or poem.

It seems that Alice Cary (1820-1871) published several books of poems as well as a book entitled "Ballads, Lyrics, and Hymns" (1866) . . . the lines you provided could have been from an old song that was transcribed in that book, or they could be one of her poems that someone put to music.

In either event I will try to come up with the tune - first by searching for it here and elsewhere on the internet, then see if I can reconstruct it from my rather weak "remembory".

Heck, I'll try to give a rough idea of the tune here - this is the best I can remember:

(approx note values: a = 1/8; A = 1/4; A. = 1/2; A.. = whole I hope this goofy notation "system" makes some sense)

GGC.C.ccG..
ECFGAG.
CCDEgG.
eeFEDC..

The C notes in the 1st line and the A in the second are above the G and all the remaining CDEF noted are below the G. The number of notes on each line does not fit with the exactly with the syllables in the lyric . . . either I am off in remembering the tune (57 years can dull ones memeory, no?) or the lyrics of the song were a variation that fit the music above. Most likely the former.

Eu

Subject: RE: 'Be Kind to One Another' Lyrics? -tearjerker
From: Joe Offer
Date: 21 Jun 07 - 04:03 PM

Hi, Eu - I figured we'd come up with an answer. Sometimes a little thing like "snow-flake" will ruin a perfectly good search. MMario has magical powers that allow him to see beyond such trivialities.

I'm having trouble figuring out the tune from your notaiton. Do you have any sort of music software that can produce a MIDI that I can post. If so, make up a MIDI and send it on to me.

-Joe Offer-
[e-mail]

---

This Google Search comes up with one possible text at the Library of Congress, but I can't get my computer to read it. Can anybody figure it out. Looks like it might be a more authentic text than the one MMario provided.

Subject: RE: 'Be Kind to One Another' Lyrics? -tearjerker
From: EuGene
Date: 21 Jun 07 - 04:39 PM

No, Joe, that's the best I can do, as I have no music capability (such as MIDI or notation software) with this computer.

If you look at the 7 notes in the first line they go like this:

quarter quarter    half    half eighth quarter dotted-half   
   G       G       C       C      c       C         G

I goofed on the last 2 notes in the example I previously sent in that I showed them as an eighth note c followed by a whole note G . . . I corrected it above. There's also a quarter note rest at the end of the 2nd line & a quarter + an eighth rest at the end of the 3rd line (a silent pregnant, perhaps?). Maybe someone that has the software can put it in a better musical format.

Eu

Eu

Subject: RE: 'Be Kind to One Another' Lyrics? -tearjerker
From: GUEST
Date: 21 Jun 07 - 10:59 PM

MMario:

About the last line in stanza 6 which reads:

"The star of life ~vent down"

the tilde must be a typo, but also what about the v of vent, should it instead be:

"The star of life went down"

By the way, I took those words over to my Mom's house -- she's in her early 80's and was very close to my great grandmother -- and I think she is still crying!! Mom wanted those words even more than I.

Eu

Subject: ADD: Dying Mother (Alice Cary)
From: Joe Offer
Date: 22 Jun 07 - 03:39 AM

I think I'll add the corrections I see needed in the text MMario posted - mostly adding missing apostrophes in possessives. The tune is my interpretation of the notation EuGene posted above. I e-mailed it to him, and he said it's exactly what he recallls.
-Joe Offer-

---

From "Poems' by Alice Cary

THE DYING MOTHER
(Alice Cary)

We were weeping 'round her pillow,
For we knew that she must die;
It was night within our bosoms
It was night within the sky.

There were seven of us children
I, the oldest one of all;
So I tried to whisper comfort,
But the blinding tears would fall.

On my knee my little brother
Leaned his aching brow and wept,
And my sister's long black tresses
O'er my heaving bosom swept.

The shadow of an awful fear
Came o'er me as I trod
To lay the burden of our grief
Before the throne of God.

Oh! be kind to one another,
Was my mother's pleading prayer,
As her hand lay like a snow-flake
On the baby's golden hair.

Then a glory bound her forehead,
Like the glory of a crown,
And in the silent sea of death
The star of life went down.

Her latest breath was borne away
Upon that loving prayer,
And the hand grew heavier, paler,
In the baby's golden hair.

---

Click to play

(EuGene's recollection of the tune)


It still would be nice to find this in an authentic source.

Subject: RE: ADD:Be Kind to One Another /Dying Mother
From: EuGene
Date: 22 Jun 07 - 10:49 AM

Joe:

The verse beginning with "Oh! Be kind to one another," was the chorus and was sung more than once. Mom said that she remembers that it was two verses/chorus/two verses/chorus/two verses/chorus (the final chorus with a gradual slowing down on the last 3 notes to end the song).

Also, the last two lines of the verses (other than the chorus) went like this:

1/4..1/4..1/2..1/2..1/8..1/8..1/4..1/4
.G....G....C....C....C....C....C....G (these C notes are above the G & there was somewhat of a fermata extending the last G)

1/4..1/4..1/2..1/2..1/8..1/8..3/4 (all these notes are below the G)
.E....E....F....E....D....D....C

(for the last note I put 3/4 to indicate a dotted half note)

Neither Mom nor I could remember how the first two lines of those verses went.

Maybe the above additional info will help track down the tune.

EuGene

Subject: RE: ADD:Be Kind to One Another /Dying Mother
From: EuGene
Date: 22 Jun 07 - 11:33 AM

Folks: I just found Alice Cary's "Ballads, Lyrics, and Hymns" (1866, 1st Edition) and since it was only $13 with shipping, I figured that I would just order it. I just might have a lot of information on old songs that I can use, even if "The Dying Mother" is not in that particular book. We'll see! Maybe the book will have some lyrics that other folks on here are looking for.   Eu

Subject: RE: ADD:Be Kind to One Another /Dying Mother
From: MMario
Date: 22 Jun 07 - 11:38 AM

I don't think "The Dying Mother" was published until 1903 - but I could be wrong.

Subject: RE: ADD:Be Kind to One Another /Dying Mother
From: EuGene
Date: 22 Jun 07 - 12:22 PM

MMario: Have you any idea whether the 1903 "The Dying Mother" was published as a poem or as sheet music. Alice Cary died in 1871, and as a very prolific writer had many books of poems published during her lifetime. It could be that if she wrote the lyrics as a poem, it was published during her lifetime, then 30 years or so later someone published it as a song. Of course, it could have been sung for any number of years prior to 1903, and maybe even previously published.

It is doubtful that Alice Cary, not known as a song writer, wrote it as a song, if she wrote it herself, that is . . . if it is in her book, "Ballads, Lyrics, and Hymns", it could be just part of a compilation of tunes which were written by others. More research on my part is definately called for.   Eu

Subject: RE: ADD:Be Kind to One Another /Dying Mother
From: Mick Pearce (MCP)
Date: 22 Jun 07 - 12:43 PM

Ballads, Lyrics and Hymns can be found at Ballads, Lyrics and Hymns - Making of America Books, as also is Early and Late Poems of Alice and Phoebe Cary and The Poetical Works of Alice and Phoebe Cary. (On a quick scan of the contents I didn't see The Dying Mother in any of them, but a more detailed scan of the books might be more revealing).

At least 2 of her poems were set by Joseph Philbrick Webster, but this one is not listed there.

Mick

Subject: RE: ADD:Be Kind to One Another /Dying Mother
From: MMario
Date: 22 Jun 07 - 12:53 PM

I only googled a list of poems by alice cary - they listed the publication date as 1903. It may have been a re-print; may have been a postumous publication of something from manuscript. I don't know.

Subject: RE: ADD:Be Kind to One Another /Dying Mother
From: EuGene
Date: 22 Jun 07 - 02:45 PM

MMario: I found "The Dying Mother" on pp. 155 - 156 of Alice Cary's book, "Poems", published in 1855, so it had been around for at least 48 years by the time it was reprinted in 1903.

The thing that has still managed to elude me is when the poem was used as the lyrics to a song, by whom was that done, and what is the full melody that was used . . . also, were the words in the song the same as the poem or were the modified to fit the tune. Most of the preceding may not be known, but possibly somewhere along the line the song may have been published, and a copy may still be extant.

Oh, the Carter Family had a song entitled "The Dying Mother" back about 1940, but I haven't found the tune & words, so I don't know if there is any connection.

I'll keep digging.   Eu

Subject: RE: ADD:Be Kind to One Another /Dying Mother
From: Mick Pearce (MCP)
Date: 22 Jun 07 - 03:42 PM

The poem was printed as part of an extract from Poems in the New Books section of The Living Age Vol 45, Issue 568, April 1855 The Dying Mother.

Joe - The American Memory sheet seems to be a different poem of Alice Cary's set by another composer (not the one I mentioned above). I still can't find a song-sheet for this one.

Mick

Subject: RE: ADD:Be Kind to One Another /Dying Mother
From: Mick Pearce (MCP)
Date: 22 Jun 07 - 03:51 PM

EuGene - The Carter Family song is something different - you can find the words here: The Dying Mother - Carter Family.

Mick

Subject: RE: ADD:Be Kind to One Another /Dying Mother
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 27 Jun 07 - 10:01 PM

"Poems" by Alice Cary (Ticknor and Fields, 1855) can be viewed online with Google Book Search. THE DYING MOTHER is on page 155.

Subject: RE: ADD:Be Kind to One Another /Dying Mother
From: EuGene
Date: 27 Jun 07 - 11:44 PM

Jim: Thanx for the info.   Eu