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Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot |
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Subject: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: oldhippie Date: 09 Feb 09 - 07:40 AM This guy deserves a song in his honour, anyone up to the challenge? LONDON - A British prosecutor says an elderly milkman supplied customers with cannabis as well as bottles of milk. Robert Holding, 72, delivered marijuana as he made his daily rounds in the town of Burnely, in northwestern England. Prosecutor Sarah Statham said Friday that Holding offered the drug to elderly customers suffering from aches and pain. She says the customers left Holding notes on their doorsteps to order the drug. |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: melodeonboy Date: 09 Feb 09 - 08:35 AM Now, there's a challenge! |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: melodeonboy Date: 09 Feb 09 - 09:37 AM He could hear his head pound As he slouched across the ground And the redness of his eyes As they spun round and round And he walked into the sink estate Three quarters in his vest His name was Danny And he drove the slowest milk cart in the west Now Danny loved a widow A lady known as Sue She lived all alone in Linley Lane At number twenty two They said she was too good for him She was haughty, proud and chic But Danny sold his reefers there Three times every week They called him Danny (Danny) And he drove the slowest milk cart in the west She said she'd like a few ounces He said alright sweetheart And when he finished work one night He loaded up the cart He said d'you want Morocccan ? Cos' Moroccan's what I buy She says Danny I'll have a Tunisian As long as it gets me high And that tickled old Danny (Danny) And he drove the slowest milk cart in the west Now Danny had a rival An evil looking man Called Two Toke Tom from Teddington And he drove the baker's van He tempted her with his king-size spliffs And his tasty wholemeal bread And when she took a puff of his latest skunk It very near blew her head She was taken aback by his Afghan black And he said now if you treat me right You'll have grass every morning And resin every night He knew once she'd sampled his space cake He'd have his wicked way And all Ernie had to offer Was an eighth of Moroccan a day Poor Ernie (Ernie) And he drove the slowest milk cart in the west One lunchtime Tom saw Danny's horse and cart outside her door But he got stoned and next he knew it was nigh on half past four And as he leaped down from his van THC through his veins did course And he went across to Danny's cart And started talking to his horse Whose name was Smokey (Smokey) And he pulled the slowest milk cart in the west Now Danny rushed out into the street His resin in his hand He said if you want to marry Susie You'll fight for her like a man Oh why don't we play cards for her ? Tom slurringly replied And just to make it interesting We'll have a quarter on the side Now Danny dragged him from his van And beneath the sky so pale The two men stood there face to face And Tom went for his scales But Ernie was too quick Things didn't go the way Tom planned And half an ounce of resin sent them spinning from his hand Now Sue she ran between them And tried to keep them apart And Danny pushed her aside And a space cake caught him underneath his heart And he looked up in pained surprise As the concrete hardened crust Of some four-year old black caught him in the back And Danny bit the dust Poor Danny (Danny) And he drove the slowest milk cart in the west Danny was only fifty-two, he didn't want to die Now he's gone to make deliveries To the dopeheads in the sky Where the customers are all stoned And drug squads are banned And a dealer's life is full of fun In that hippy-dippy land But a woman's needs are many fold And Sue she married Ted But strange things happened on their wedding night Before they got to bed They were up all night with the shits, why, they didn't know Or was it that dodgy resin Danny'd sold them months ago They won't forget Danny (Danny) And he drove the slowest milk cart in the west |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: VirginiaTam Date: 09 Feb 09 - 09:38 AM Ya turn the crank in the old google machine and look what you get? Hemp Milk Sign up for the Marijuana Mobility Scheme Just imagine all those bungalo conservatories set up as as Gram and Gramp's Ganja Greenhouse for some real Herbal Tea. |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: GUEST,KevBoyd Date: 09 Feb 09 - 09:45 AM Quiz time: Do you think "melodeonboy" has: A: An alarming familiarity with soft drug terminology B: An alarming familiarity with Benny Hill lyrics C: Too much time on his hands D: All of the above Answers on a postcard. |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: Flash Company Date: 09 Feb 09 - 10:26 AM Apologies to Tom Paxton:- Heelloo United Daireeese!! I have engaged with the Milk Bottles' And they were Smaaashed!!!!! FC |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: Richard Bridge Date: 09 Feb 09 - 10:53 AM Surely that should be "the highest milk cart in the West". Wot no Lebanese red or gold, nor Manhattan Silver? |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: DMcG Date: 09 Feb 09 - 10:58 AM Years ago our milkman delivered gold top, red top and silver top. Now you tell me, Richard, ... |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: open mike Date: 09 Feb 09 - 11:35 AM whoa! that challenge was taken up with gusto! gives a whole new meanng to Oh Danny boy, the pipe the pipe is calling... who's Ernie? here's the original hemp milk--- bhang, a holy drink used for Shiva celebrations Recipe for bhang from Flavors of India by Shanta Nimbark Sacharoff. Ingredients: * 2 cups water * 1 ounce marijuana (fresh leaves and flowers of a female plant preferred) * 4 cups warm milk * 2 tablespoons blanched and chopped almonds * 1/8 teaspoon garam masala [a mixture of cloves, cinnamon, and cardamon] * 1/4 teaspoon powdered ginger * 1/2 to 1 teaspoon rosewater * 1 cup sugar Instructions: 1. Stop. Breathe. Smile. Bring the water to a rapid boil and pour into a clean teapot. Remove any seeds or twigs from the marijuana, add it to the teapot and cover. Let this brew for about 7 minutes. Now strain the water and marijuana through a piece of muslin cloth, collect the water and save. Take the leaves and flowers and squeeze between your hands to extract any liquid that remains. Add this to the water. Place the leaves and flowers in a mortar and add 2 teaspoons warm milk. Slowly but firmly grind the milk and leaves together. Gather up the marijuana and squeeze out as much milk as you can. Repeat this process until you have used about 1/2 cup of milk (about 4 to 5 times). Collect all the milk that has been extracted and place in a bowl. By this time the marijuana will have turned into a pulpy mass. Add the chopped almonds and some more warm milk. Grind this in the mortar until a fine paste is formed. Squeeze this paste and collect the extract as before. Repeat a few more times until all that is left are some fibers and nut meal. Discard the residue. Combine all the liquids that have been collected, including the water the marijuana was brewed in. Add to this the garam masala, dried ginger and rosewater. Add the sugar and remaining milk. Chill, serve, and enjoy! It seems a bit labor intensive, but then it is meant as an offering to Shiva. |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: Nigel Parsons Date: 09 Feb 09 - 12:26 PM As our winter world awakens With its fresh white snowy coat Here's the Old Dope Peddlar On his electric white milk float Every morning you will find him In the Burnley neighbourhood With his little half-gram packets Making old folks feel quite good. He gives old folks free samples Because he knows full well That an NHS prescription Won't relieve his clients' hell. Just ignore that damned arthritis As you feel the pain just stop With a little dose of ganja And a pint of 'Golden Top' With apologies to Mr Lehrer!! |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: Georgiansilver Date: 09 Feb 09 - 01:15 PM ROFLOL @ Nigels effort..... |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: Georgiansilver Date: 09 Feb 09 - 02:13 PM Early one morning, Just as the sun was rising. I heard the milkman singing, As he went on his round. Who wants some pot today, 'twill take the pain away. How could you not buy My cannabis today. |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: DMcG Date: 09 Feb 09 - 02:25 PM I've just realised it has already gone world wide as one of the songs from 'Oliver!': Who will buy this wonderful morning Such a sky you never did see Who will tie it up with a ribbon And put it in a box for me So I could see it at my leisure Whenever things go wrong And keep it as a treasure To last my whole life long Who will buy this wonderful feeling I'm so high I swear I could fly Me oh my, I don't want to lose it So what am I to do to keep this sky so blue There must be someone who will buy |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: Jim Carroll Date: 10 Feb 09 - 04:28 AM Don't know about this sort of pot but..... Years ago we were visiting Ireland and had been taken to a wonderful music session in County Limerick. Later we assembled in the box player's house for a home session and were offered a drink of poitín. Due to leave for home the following day, we asked about obtaining a bottle, whereupon our host presented us with a Lucozade bottle of the rather beautiful brew. We demurred, saying we didn't want to deprive him. "It's o.k.", he said, "It's Monday tomorrow", the milkman always drops off two bottles on the back step". Civilisation - or what? Jim Carroll |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: Nigel Parsons Date: 10 Feb 09 - 04:44 AM Or Pot Song by Jeremy Taylor |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: Nigel Parsons Date: 10 Feb 09 - 07:10 AM With apologies to Julie Andrews: MY FAVOURITE THING! Rheumatic pains, and migraines that blight us Toothache, back ache & bloody arthritis All aging pains that will ruin our day These are some things that the 'weed' blows away! Family worries, concerns about credit, Failing libido (Okay, now, I've said it) Government taxes, and how will I pay Just a few cares that the weed blows away. In the morning, while I'm yawning, lying in my bunk My roundsman delivers my milk and my cream (and) a couple of grams of 'skunk |
Subject: RE: Song Challenge: Milkman delivers pot From: alanabit Date: 10 Feb 09 - 09:07 AM Hilarious! I'll steal that! |
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