What not to call a band

Subject: What not to call a band
From: Mo the caller
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 06:57 AM

I've just been looking at the Water Aid website and clicked on the Manchester Ceilidh.
There was very little detail but it said Gay Gordons. I wondered if this was the name of a band, but Google really is no help.
They are almost as unfindable as a Smith in a phone book.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Declan
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 06:59 AM

I always fancied calling a band Many More. You would get lots of Fesival gigs, but always be bottom of the bill.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Mo the caller
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 07:04 AM

I sometimes call with Full House, but was told that by a dancer that people might not go to the dances, thinking they were sold out.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 07:09 AM

The story goes that, in Patrick Street's early days, the band had booked into an hotel, to find when they arrived that just a single room had been booked in the name of Mr P. Street. :-)

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: SteveMansfield
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 07:10 AM

I used to be part of a band called Trebuchet, and indeed they've carried on without me.

We thought we'd be beaten in the search engines by the medieval seige engine - but it certainly didn't strike me that we'd also be fighting for Goggleability against every mention of the font ....

Other things not to call yourself probably include

Free Bar And Buffet
Late License
Don't Expect Paying
etc.

and I can't imagine anyone would want to call themselves after certain tunes - Jack's Maggot springs to mind ...

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,Jonny Sunshine
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 08:56 AM

"Many More" certainly get about, but not as much as "TBC" or my favourite act "Plus Local Support"

Names that are easily mis-pronounced or misspelt are always a bad move.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: wysiwyg
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 09:17 AM

"All-Request All-Stars"

NOT!

~S~

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,AndyJames
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 09:50 AM

How about:

Please Observe Dress Code

Mensa Members Only

Featuring Extended Tin Whistle Improv

(ducks flying tin whistles)

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 10:18 AM

Mike Hunt and the Beavers
Wayne Kerr, and Full Supporting Cast

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Geoff the Duck
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 10:33 AM

I'd like to see Ducks flying tin whistles...
Quack!
GtD.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: oldhippie
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 10:43 AM

Free Beer Tomorrow

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,Tunesmith
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 10:51 AM

The rock band Free had trouble in their early days with venues saying that audiences thought that the performance was free. But some names I think are just stupid; for example, why would a Scotish band want to call themselves Texas?

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Alice
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 10:58 AM

The Out of Tuners

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 11:01 AM

avoid anything that's smells bad or seems dirty.

(I haven't picked up an issue of 'Dirty Linen' yet.)

I agree that 'Patrick Street' is not a good name for a band. People who have never heard of the band think it's just a solo gig. Are they still in business, by the way?

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 11:02 AM

The Major Losers

George Bush

Jock Itch

The Acne of Success

The Rolling Scones

Really, the possibilities are endless...

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST, topsie
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 11:07 AM

There's one near here called Saxon Drain, possibly after the place they practice?
I find the name so off-putting that I've yet to go and hear them.

[apologies to any members of the band who might be reading this]

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: BobKnight
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 11:09 AM

A good way of avoiding the tax man - "Private Function," which is a wee bit suggestive as well. :)

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Leadfingers
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 02:22 PM

All the bands I have been in NEVER wanted to be called Too late to get a drink !

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Dave MacKenzie
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 05:31 PM

When I was with "Tripe and Onions" we ended up calling ourseves the "Tripe and Onions Band"

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 05:54 PM

I blame Paddy Marchant.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Acorn4
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 06:23 PM

In the days of cassette tapes "Head Cleaner" might have been quite successful!

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Barbara
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 06:33 PM

No Cover

or maybe things like

Dueling Accordians
Cat Fight Bagpipe Band
2 Stoned 2 Play

Blessings,
Barbara

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Don(Wyziwyg)T
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 06:43 PM

"Time Gentlemen Please"
"Gastric Band"
"Five Fingered Widow"
"Jason and the Arguments"

Don T.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 06:43 PM

Free Pizza

Clod & Brisket

Always loved the named Starboard List.

Linn

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Ross Campbell
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 07:24 PM

Upcoming Shows at Fleetwood Folk Club, Thursday nights at the Steamer, Dock Street, Fleetwood, Lancashire

8 Oct 2009         20:30
        Former Residents of Fleetwood Folk Club
15 Oct 2009         20:30
        Party Night - 40 years of Fleetwood Folk Club
22 Oct 2009         20:30
        Bonded Boots
29 Oct 2009         20:30
        Free Sandwiches

Sadly, we were unable to book Free Beer (Tomorrow or any other day).

Check http://www.myspace.com/fleetwoodfolkclub if you don't believe me!

Ross

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Jack Campin
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 08:00 PM

Right now in Edinburgh, you wouldn't get many bookings if your band was called "Tram Works".

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,Nick E
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 08:27 PM

To Be Announced

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Artful Codger
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 08:55 PM

"The (your-name-here) Experience": well, I guess disappointment is an experience.

"The Newbies"

"Ocarinas and Bagpipes"

"Second Door on the Left"

"Great Expectorations"

"Last Minute Replacements"

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Little Robyn
Date: 03 Oct 09 - 08:57 PM

My husband is in a band called Last ones out - because by the time they've taken down the sound system they usually are.
Robyn

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: M.Ted
Date: 04 Oct 09 - 02:53 AM

I could make up funny names, but they'd just be made up names. Here are names that people really used(including links to their music, when possible), though God only knows why--The Worst Band Names of 2007

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST
Date: 04 Oct 09 - 02:59 AM

Blood Bourne Pathogenes - aka - BBP

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Nick
Date: 04 Oct 09 - 05:10 AM

Cancelled Due to Illness

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: catspaw49
Date: 04 Oct 09 - 05:55 AM

We Suck
Can't Play for Shit
Navel Gazers
Pickin Boogers
Happy Blues Band

Actually its hard to think of dumbass band names as so many are real...........

Toad, the Wet Sprocket
Alice in Chains
Dropkick Murphys
Cradle of Filth
Hoobastank
Death Cab for Cutie....a personal favorite


Spaw

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 04 Oct 09 - 06:09 AM

Hitler Youth Band.

Dave H

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Tradsinger
Date: 04 Oct 09 - 11:32 AM

I liked the name of the band from Hampshire - The Itchen Scratch Band. There is an ageing rock group in Gloucestershire called The Shy Teds (think about it).

I would like to call a band Porky Pie and the Flying Pigs.

Tradsinger

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Tim Leaning
Date: 04 Oct 09 - 12:09 PM

Band in Scarbro area Shy TalK

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: meself
Date: 04 Oct 09 - 12:25 PM

There was a band in my neck of the woods some years back that had named themselves after the Blue Rodeo hit, "Bad Timing". I guess they just didn't think it through ....

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Nicholas Waller
Date: 04 Oct 09 - 12:31 PM

On the Googleability front - which wouldn't have been a consideration when the bands were formed - you'd think "Muse", "Yes" and especially "The The" would be terrible band names but it turns out they all come up first or second choice when I google for them. Even "Free" comes up fourth.

I should think calling your pub/folk-circuit band by some popular pub name - Queen's Head, White Hart, Royal Oak - would cause confusion.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 04 Oct 09 - 03:25 PM

To take a cue from the Kipper Family, hows about "Norfolk 'n' Good?"

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 04 Oct 09 - 06:33 PM

I think that one's been done Steve.

"Drunk on Stage"
"Suffer little Children"
"Paedophile"
"The BNP"
"Give it up for Jesus"
"The Conservative Party"
"Braille Beauty Contest"
"Howler Monkey"

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 04 Oct 09 - 07:01 PM

Well I can't find it on this thread, Richard.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 04 Oct 09 - 07:09 PM

There used to be a local (Portsmouth, NH, USA) rock band called "Jiggle the Handle".

And there used to be a local pipe band called "FTITCTAJ" (pronounced "fa-tit-ca-tage"). The initials stood for "Fxxk Them If They Can't Take a Joke".

Linn

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Vic Smith
Date: 04 Oct 09 - 07:46 PM

Tradsinger wrote

I liked the name of the band from Hampshire - The Itchen Scratch Band.

To be honest, that was a one-off pick-up band for a dance in Southampton and I just happened to be the caller. Fortunately, the band I normally work with has a much more sensible name.

Vic Smith
(member of The Sussex Pistols)

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Fidjit
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 12:28 AM

I have friends who call themselves "Still no Bagpipes"

I've often said that I am a one man ceilidh band called "Left Leg Over".

It's a chauvinistic reference to when friends ask "How are you getting on?". The sexist reply is ,"Left leg over".

The groups I am actually in are "Halmstråket" which is Swedish and translates to "Straw Bow".

The other group is called "Fidjits" Hence my Mudcat name.

Chas

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Peace
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 12:38 AM

RE: What not to call a band

The Elastic
The Rubber
The Head

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Barbara
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 12:54 AM

The Gastric

..to follow Peace's lead.
Blessings,
Barbara

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 04:23 AM

No, what I meant, Steve, was that after the Trunch input on the topic I think there actually was a band of that name.

I ahve thought of another

"THe Gary Glitter reunion tour"

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: bubblyrat
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 04:36 AM

Don MacKenzie (Glasgow,but now Gosport ) and I were sometimes known as " Aha !Don!" , and we were both in bands aboard carrier HMS Eagle,he in "Sounds Fayre" and me in "The Guinness Grenadiers" ; later,we teamed up with Martin Horan and others in Gosport as "Hay Fever" so called because we got up peoples' noses .

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Vic Smith
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 05:05 AM

How about Canny Play which would have totally different meanings in Glasgow and Newcastle?

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST, topsie
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 05:32 AM

"Hay Fever" - How about Hey Fever?

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,Dave hunt
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 07:17 AM

I have called with these bands
Syphon the Python
Les Miserables and the Proper Pissers
Cwm Dancing (love that one - some members from Wales)
May Contain Nuts

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Mr Happy
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 09:08 AM

'Names that are easily mis-pronounced or misspelt are always a bad move. '

....recalling some time back at Chester FF, a local folkie acting as MC in a marquee concert, announcing a band called 'Sileas' as ' Silly Arse'!!

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Charley Noble
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 09:34 AM

One of my favorite suggested names for our dance band was "Further Ado." I figured no one could plan a special event without giving us a call.

The worst suggested name was "Down the Loo."

We settled for "The Sea Slugs."

Cheerily,
Charley Noble

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Doktor Doktor
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 09:45 AM

For a while we had "Earem & Greive" on singers nights

& the ever popular "Come All Ye"

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Mark Ross
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 09:59 AM

There was a duo back in the day in Greenwich Village that called themselves "Free Beer". And then, there was "Breakfast Special" which had as members Kenny Kosek, Andy Statman, Tony Trischka, and Stacy Phillips.

But the worst band name I've ever run across was here in Eugene OR; a punk band that called itself FUCK GOD IN THE FACE!

Mark Ross

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 10:00 AM

The Shy Torques

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Sailor Ron
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 10:15 AM

I was once in a group called "Skidmarks", we didn't get any bookings [mainly because we were crap].

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,Jonny Sunshine
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 10:29 AM

I have to admit there was a certain naive honesty about the band that called themselves "Bob's little brother's mate's band"

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: theleveller
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 10:39 AM

Whatever you do, don't call yourself Whipstaff because that's our name.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Charley Noble
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 10:45 AM

One of my best names for a sea music band has to be "Roll & Go." We get product placement in many traditional sea shanties.

The only downside has been the persistent attempts by portable toilet vendors to purchase our name. We would never sell out for money!

Cheerily,
Charley Noble
Roll & Go, Inc.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: frogprince
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 10:46 AM

I guess it was Saturday Night Live, years ago, that did a take off on the Smucker's "With a name like Smucker's, it has to be good" slogan. A co-worker's husband came up with something at the time that could be just as "good" for a band: "Dead Rats In A Drain Pipe".

Then again, it just occured to me that "Weird Smell in Corner" has a certain ring to it...

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: banjoman
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 11:14 AM

I once played in a band called "The British standard Brown Ale & Black Pudding Band" Didn't get many gigs as they couldn't fit our name on their posters.
We later changed the the name to "Dis Band" which later evolved into The Old Trout Band which is still very active in Hampshire and the Southern counties

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: HuwG
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 01:56 PM

I knew some Chemistry students who formed a punk band named "Hoffman Degredation". It's a chemical process by which an organic amide is converted to an amine, and involves the loss of a carbon molecule from the alliphatic carbon chain. <yawn>

By the time they had explained the origin of their name, for all I know with chalk and overhead projectors (no PowerPoint presentations in those days, thankfully), the gig was almost over.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Anne Lister
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 05:02 PM

I always wanted to be in a band called Lemming Moran and the Tarts. It didn't happen.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: bubblyrat
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 05:07 PM

Many years ago ,"Private Eye" magazine kept going on about a group called "Spiggy Topes and the Turds"....
            I rather liked that.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: DPF
Date: 05 Oct 09 - 09:26 PM

I recently came across a heavy metal band in western Massachusetts calling themselves "Skillet".

Unfortunately, they looked serious. Very Serious.

I'm sorely tempted to let them in on the joke.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Bryn Pugh
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 07:35 AM

Farquanelle ?

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Gedi
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 08:15 AM

how about "The Fold Arts Band"

Ged

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Mooh
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 08:53 AM

Once, for a year and countless gigs, I played with a singer who chose to switch from his own name to a "band" name, in an effort to appear more democratic to the band. He was a tyrant either way. He named the band "By Special Appointment". Folks would approach us and ask what our name was and why the gig was by special appointment. Stupid name.

Some years later there was the band "...and the Penetrators", not related I believe to the many current bands with a similar name. All we got were drunken house parties and the like. Figures. I couldn't keep up to the level of partying anyway.

Peace, Mooh.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 09:10 AM

I suppose The Nipple Erectors would be, at least, er, eye-catching on a poster.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST
Date: 06 Oct 09 - 11:57 AM

The Glitter Band

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 05:36 AM

Prick up Your Ears!

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Mr Red
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 11:47 AM

There is a shanty duo in Gloucestershire called the "Two Anchors".

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Jim Dixon
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 01:05 PM

Some Minnesota Bands:

Front Porch Swingin' Liquor Pigs

Trampled by Turtles

Two Many Banjos

Pert Near Sandstone (Sandstone is a town in Minnesota)

Not from Minnesota, but I once met a busker who said he was a member of Shoot the Hostages. Oddly enough, the guy played good Irish fiddle, but you don't hear that in the band.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Rasener
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 01:31 PM

Too many posts to go and read at the moment.

has anybody done

R Souls

Dicky and the Condoms

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 02:35 PM

Karaoke

Old Skool Disco

Under 18 night.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Rasener
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 02:41 PM

Vin Garbutt

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Willie-O
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 02:50 PM

If you're not in Canada, you probably don't know about the Polaris Prize, and that this year it went to veteran punk band Fucked Up.

Should have heard all the perorations of that name on the radio the next day...many (as in the case of mentions of another prominent Cdn band, Holy Fuck), called it "effed up". The CBC decided their announcers wouldn't say "Fucked Up" but that it was okay to run the sound clip "the award goes to...Fucked Up."   

There's also another long-running outfit in Toronto "Bunchafuckingoofs". BFG if you like.

Makes me sound pretty tame, which is how I like it.
I used to be in the Seldom Heard, after which I swore off self-fulfilling prophecy in band names. I like The Media Darlings better.

W-O

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 06:27 PM

Vin Garbutt is not a band, it's a speech writer.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Mooh
Date: 08 Oct 09 - 09:12 PM

There sure are a lot of singers named Kara Oke, or one that gets around like VD, so I wouldn't choose that name.

Peace, Mooh.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 09 Oct 09 - 05:09 AM

Juan Kerr and the Seamen

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,Ian Gill
Date: 14 Oct 09 - 02:25 PM

I was a member of 'Les Mis and the PP.S' for a while.We weren't that bad actually! Very sadly in the 70's I was also a member of a band called 'Plughole' - who lived up to their name in terms of career progression...what not to call a band, indeed.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: MikeofNorthumbria
Date: 14 Oct 09 - 06:47 PM

HuwG

>>I knew some Chemistry students who formed a punk band named "Hoffman Degredation"<<

Nice one Huw.

When I was a guitar-playing chemistry student many years ago, some friends and I talked about forming a band called "Al D. Hyde and the Ketones". Never got around to doing it, but I believe somebody else eventually used the name and achieved a modest success. Ah well, another career opportunity missed!

Other possible names for chemistry student bands might be "Bunsen and the Burners", "The Harvard Synthesis" , "Hell, Volhard and Zilinsky", or "The Green Yard Reagents". Or possibly not!

Wassail!

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: scouse
Date: 15 Oct 09 - 04:23 AM

I well remember in Southampton years ago there was a bunch of guys who called themselves the "Stinkin' Prongful." Sang with a few of them!!
As Aye,
Phil.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Bryn Pugh
Date: 15 Oct 09 - 05:17 AM

Since there is a thread about the Manchester Sports Guild folk club currently, who could forget Big John MacAtee's Baekelite Nipple Band ?

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Black belt caterpillar wrestler
Date: 15 Oct 09 - 07:43 AM

We did think of renaming "Blind Panic" to "Bland picnic" for a vegetarian gig.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,Malcolm Storey
Date: 15 Oct 09 - 09:24 PM

There used to be a band called Blue Anchor up Middlesborough way and of course one of Vin Garbutt's early albums was called King Gooden! and the Watersons performed alongside the Rubber Band.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: JesseW
Date: 18 Oct 09 - 02:38 PM

There's a filk group called Roadkill out there -- I'd be sort of afraid to hear them if they were on tour...

Excellent thread, BTW -- lots of guffaws reading it.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: frogprince
Date: 18 Oct 09 - 09:46 PM

The wife and I spent a while yesterday at a nearby cider mill listening to "The Porta Potty Pickers". No lie. While I don't expect to see them on national television any time soon, they were more than good enough to put on a really enjoyable country-style show; respectable picking, respectable singing and harmonizing, and very diverse and well chosen repertoire spanning everything from stuff at least 80 years old to Guy Clark, Tom Paxton, and Garth Brookes. Just 4 guys from 50ish to 70ish having a lot of fun.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Luthier2b
Date: 18 Oct 09 - 11:43 PM

The band names that cam immediately to my mind were:
* Stage Dark
* Spot O'pot
* Mike Recker
* Barry Manillow
* Just Paroled
* Klezmer King Krimson
* Aunty Semite
* DOA
* Wrong Date
* Closed For Renovation

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST
Date: 19 Oct 09 - 05:02 AM

One of these days, I'm going to form a bluesy pub-rock band full of fat, balding middle-aged men.

We will be called Prostate.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Bryn Pugh
Date: 20 Oct 09 - 04:49 AM

A name like mine lends itself to parody.

My former flatmate, Greame, suggested Grim Spew and the Come Stains.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Jack Campin
Date: 20 Oct 09 - 07:37 AM

A young traditional band would be well advised not call themselves The Kiddie Fiddlers.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST
Date: 20 Oct 09 - 08:50 AM

"We've All Slept With The Banjo Players New Wife"

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST
Date: 25 Oct 09 - 07:04 PM

anyone remember Pete Ness and the Four Skins?

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Feb 17 - 10:05 AM

From Southampton
JABB (just another bloody band)
Bruce Roberts had a band called Fester and the Vomits.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: JHW
Date: 11 Feb 17 - 10:51 AM

'one of Vin Garbutt's early albums was called King Gooden'
and there was Shy Tot Pommie

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Richard Mellish
Date: 11 Feb 17 - 03:37 PM

I'm surprised that no-one has mentioned The Otterby Band, so called because they "oughta be banned".

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,Tom Mycock
Date: 12 Feb 17 - 05:52 AM

I play in a ska band, we used to gig quite regularly with Catch-It Kebabs, also a local ska punk band called Special Guests.

My own pet hate is bands with numbers and / or punctuation marks in their names, don't know why but it gets on my wick.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: ced2
Date: 12 Feb 17 - 07:20 AM

Snotty and the Nose Pickers

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST
Date: 12 Feb 17 - 09:05 AM

My mate Arthur & me are both getting on a bit & became
Arthur Itis and the Plastic Hips

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Feb 17 - 10:18 AM

In the current US political climate, it probably wouldn't be a good idea to name a band "Truck Fump".

It's not a bad name, but you'd be risking bodily harm if one of the more rabid supporters of a certain future ex-president should get the joke.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Bonzo3legs
Date: 12 Feb 17 - 01:38 PM

Ugly Abbotts!!!

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Gallus Moll
Date: 12 Feb 17 - 07:48 PM

There was (maybe still is?) a band in the Glasgow area called 'Willie and the Hand Jive'. I used to be amazed when I saw posters /adverts for them in pubs and other venues -- must be my impure mind!

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: llareggyb
Date: 12 Feb 17 - 07:59 PM

With a nod to the Two Ronnies, *don't* call your band "What's yours"
My brother played in a group called "Sound of Silence" Now that's not so much bad as lame, lame, lame. He wanted the name to be "Brick Window" - now there's a *good* name!

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: eftifino
Date: 12 Feb 17 - 11:00 PM

There was a Melbourne group in the '80s called:

Farmers Union Creole Kings

But they had to change it when the folk saw the bass drum!

I personally like Peter Sellars' satirical:

Turk Thrust and the Y-Fronts.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,DeanofRochester
Date: 13 Feb 17 - 01:02 AM

I loved Giles Smith's book Lost in Music, when he played in a band in Essex called 'Pony'. They got loads of gigs in Essex, but whenever they tried to get a gig in London, were just laughed at.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,Tom Mycock
Date: 13 Feb 17 - 03:05 AM

I play guitar and sing, and I've a friend who does likewise, whose surname is Balls. We have often joked about doing a musical collaboration, Mycock & Balls.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: BobL
Date: 13 Feb 17 - 03:18 AM

Local duo Novak & Goode briefly contemplated becoming a trio, Steele Novak & Goode.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: TheSnail
Date: 13 Feb 17 - 08:49 AM

The Omega 3
Excellent band but impossible to Google for.

Following the chemistry references, there used to be a band here in Sussex called Maxwell's Demon which is a thermodynamics reference but a good name without knowing that.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Mo the caller
Date: 13 Feb 17 - 09:43 AM

A Google friendly name is important. So it needs to be obvious how you spell it, and not bring lots of unrelated results.
Friends had a group called after an old song "Mirie it is "
They had someone ring up and ask for Merryitis - like some illness where you can't stop laughing I suppose.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Howard Jones
Date: 13 Feb 17 - 10:48 AM

To answer Mo's original question, there is a Scottish country dance group for the LGBT+ community in Manchester called the Gay Gordons, so it could be them. Seems like a good name to me. Not too hard to Google if you give it a few more clues - "gay gordons folk dance manchester" finds them top of the list.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 13 Feb 17 - 10:54 AM

A friend of mine started a band called Snotty Stones and the Turdbenders. This was in the late 60s - Well before punk :-)

DtG

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: BrooklynJay
Date: 13 Feb 17 - 05:13 PM

Back in the early 1980's, I tried to get a musician friend of mine to start a mock-punk band that would feature the lead singer disemboweling himself onstage. (I do theatrical and special effects makeup.)

The band's name? Captain Colitis and the Running Sores.

Sadly, the band never got off the ground, but I still occasionally find myself thinking back to "Oh, what might have been..."

Definitely a concept that was before its time!


Jay

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Mrrzy
Date: 13 Feb 17 - 10:32 PM

On the other hand...

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,Gerry
Date: 14 Feb 17 - 05:17 AM

Australian folkie Martin Pearson formed a trio called The MP3. Try finding them on Google!

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,Mark Bluemel
Date: 14 Feb 17 - 08:03 AM

Suffering from a complete lack of inspiration, we were called BWNN (the Band With No Name)...

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Hagman
Date: 15 Feb 17 - 04:34 AM

A very succesful long-running band down here in Oz was/is Weddings, Parties, Anything...

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,Eddie1 (Cookie lost forever)
Date: 15 Feb 17 - 06:30 AM

Back in the 60s there was a band in the Edinburgh area called "Late Licence" cause they reckoned their name on a poster ensured a good -sized audience. I used to sing with a guy called Bill under the name "Edible Pear"!

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Will Fly
Date: 15 Feb 17 - 06:52 AM

My favourite (real band) name is Robert Crumb and his Cheap Suit Serenaders.

A friend of mine once played in a jug band called King Edward's Easy Scrapers.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Jack Campin
Date: 15 Feb 17 - 09:17 AM

Not an obvious choice of name given that "The band's first performance was in 1988 at Putnam's mother's house in front of some family members, namely his mother, his two little brothers and his grandmother, as well as some of his mother's friends"...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anal_Cunt

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,Mark Bluemel
Date: 15 Feb 17 - 10:12 AM

There seem to be quite a few functions bands called "Got It Covered" - hard to know if you're booking the one you thought.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST
Date: 15 Feb 17 - 10:15 AM

Some more real names:
A band in Falkirk that call themselves "The Lazy Boys of Banknock" (Banknock being a place near Falkirk).
A band that used to play at Loanhead Festival - The Betty Swallocks band (think about it!)
And "Celtic Corrections".
And in tribute to "The Silly Sisters" my friend and I call ourselves "The Crazy Cousins".

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Tradsinger
Date: 15 Feb 17 - 07:47 PM

There's a group of aging rockers in this area called "The Shy Teds".

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 16 Feb 17 - 11:02 AM

A band's name should tell you that it's a band. Shy Teds, Crazy Cousins, Cheap Serenaders are all okay names, because they let us know that humans are involved.

It's bad when you can't tell whether the name denotes a band, a song, an album or a venue. Mirie it is, MP3, Weddings Parties Anything - those names are too precious and don't help get gigs and make money.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: sleepyjon
Date: 17 Feb 17 - 05:10 AM

Tried to get some friends to go out as "Perry Stolsis and the Motions" but for some reason they didn't go for it - ?

SJ

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Stanron
Date: 19 Feb 17 - 07:24 AM

The Well Oiled Machine?

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Merritt
Date: 16 Mar 17 - 04:52 PM

Well, I've pitched Day-Old Donuts as a band name any number of times and so far never had anyone agree with me that it's just an awesome name. So, based on that experience, I guess it's what not to call a band.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST
Date: 17 Mar 17 - 07:16 AM

"Gig cancelled"

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Severn
Date: 18 Mar 17 - 07:05 AM

Then there was our old Bluegrass band, named The Sheep Mountain Boys after a country boy's first love affair......

And I was part of a Gospel Quartet down in Georgia that, somehow, nobody ever took seriously.....

And there was a holiday caroling group from India called the Mhari Krishmas that used to sing at airports before 911.......

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Severn
Date: 18 Mar 17 - 07:08 AM

Whoops! That aforementioned Gospel Group from Georgia was called The Macon Believers......

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Mr Red
Date: 19 Mar 17 - 06:36 AM

I am surprised no-one has suggested:

the Trump Pets

The Orange-a-Tans

the White Hearse

I see a theme arising............

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Sarah the flute
Date: 19 Mar 17 - 08:23 AM

I play and call in the Aqueduct Ceilidh Band. On our big bass drum we have written The Adequate Ceilidh Band and have a picture of a rather well known viaduct. It creates a talking point at gigs - check out our website to see a pic.

We also went through a band name choosing with a kind of South London theme and came up with

Eltham John, Catford Stevens, Jonah Lewisham and Deptford Leopard

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Snuffy
Date: 19 Mar 17 - 12:28 PM

The Hackney Martians has to be one of the best names ever actually used.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST,Biffo
Date: 19 Mar 17 - 05:34 PM

My album was goan to be "See inlay card for details"

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Mr Red
Date: 20 Mar 17 - 05:17 AM

Hackney Martians LOL

what about the "Pinner 4"?
"Bow & Harrow Brigade" ?
"Waltham Stoics"
"Harringay Gordons"
"Theydon Boys"
"Wool Itch Jumpers"
"Epsom Psalters"
"Feltham Hall"
"Shirley Knot"

And avoid, at all costs, any mention of Cockfosters

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: GUEST, Paul Slade
Date: 20 Mar 17 - 10:51 AM

There was a bit of craze for cowpunk and pub bluegrass here in North London a few years back. One of the bands this spawned was called Banjovi. Genius!

I also have very fond memories of Psycho Ceilidh, who used to play a Finsbury Park pub every Sunday afternoon. They did a great version of Lou Reed's Vicious, which went like this:

You're savage,
You hit me with a cabbage,
Three times a week on average!
Baby, you're so savage.

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 20 Mar 17 - 06:28 PM

There used to be a band around Portsmouth, NH called Jiggle The Handle.

Linn

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 20 Mar 17 - 08:45 PM

We play in Edinburgh about 6 times a year, and rebelled against being called a band, as it seemed too exclusive, so came to a mathematical solution - we are the Cafe Ceilidh X-tet (where X = any number), so anyone can come along and join in!

Subject: RE: What not to call a band
From: Mo the caller
Date: 21 Mar 17 - 09:26 AM

I like that one. Not a "what not to call" at all.