BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: frogprince
Date: 22 Mar 11 - 11:55 AM

Lovin'someone a lot can mean hurting along with them, for sure.
((((((P-Vine, and Bobert))))))

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Little Robyn
Date: 22 Mar 11 - 03:44 PM

I had my check-up.
All good!
Everything has healed up (from last May and June's ops) and all movement is back to where it was before then.
No pain, no problems.
The only thing is, there's a gap where my left boob used to be.
I can live with that.
The P-Vine should just take it easy for a month or two, then she'll be fine and you can forget all about it.
That's what I did and I feel great now.
Love to you both.
Robyn

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 22 Mar 11 - 03:51 PM

Bobert you are such a treasure and I am sure P-Vine knows this.

Is she permitted to use ice packs to numb and reduce swelling? Frozen peas work a treat because they are not hard jagged lumps of ice and easy to mold around affected area.

Wishing her much relief as soon as possible.

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: jacqui.c
Date: 24 Mar 11 - 08:35 AM

Robyn - such good news!

Bobert and Eve - hope today is better than yesterday and that tomorrow is even better.

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Bobert
Date: 24 Mar 11 - 08:52 AM

Seems that the main source of pain is the hole where the drain tube came out... It's not infected, however, so maybe it will subside today... She's going to try again to ween herself off the heavy duty pain meds...

I think she's up to actually going for a short ride today so that's a good sign...

BTW, Robyn, she is going to have an implant which means 3 or 4 trips to the hospital to have an expander partially filled to stretch the skin and in about 2 months they will take the expander out and stick the implant in... I mean, I would be okay with her not doing that but she has never worn a bra and doesn't want to start now and that what the prosthesis thingie, in essence, is...

I know... TMI...

Thanks all...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: wysiwyg
Date: 24 Mar 11 - 07:25 PM

Bobert whatever they do remember it's gonna be real purty like she allus iz.

~Susan

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Bobert
Date: 24 Mar 11 - 07:43 PM

Yer right, WYSuze....

I ain't worried about it at all... If it looks like a '57 DeSoto I don't care... Sans the hood ornament, of course...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: katlaughing
Date: 24 Mar 11 - 11:12 PM

Robyn, that's wonderful news!

Bobert just keep being yourself. Did you see the song I posted for you to learn and sing to her? I think I put it in the Sold the Farm thread. It's an original by Randy Boone who used to sing on the Virginian and is still writing songs and singing...pretty decent, too.:-)

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Little Robyn
Date: 25 Mar 11 - 07:13 AM

I had a bit of bother with my drainage tube too - it stayed in too long and it wasn't nice coming out. It had more than 15 inches under the skin and was stitched into place. It stayed sore for longer than the actual op pain and made playing my pipes too hard - the bellows strap went right over the tender bit. But it's OK now.
They gave me about 100 panadol pills when I left the hospital but I've still got most of them.
I didn't want any reconstruction and I don't have a prosthesis. In fact, I only wear a bra when I'm trying to be a lady and since I've stopped working, that's not often!
Robyn

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Lizzie Cornish 1
Date: 25 Mar 11 - 08:04 AM

There's so much love in this thread...and in Dan's one too. Keep going Lads..and I hope your Lassies know what absolute treasures you both are..Love to you all. x

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: jacqui.c
Date: 25 Mar 11 - 08:28 AM

Good morning both - it's bright and sunny in Maine today. I hope that the outlook is the same for you.

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Bobert
Date: 25 Mar 11 - 08:32 AM

I'll check out that song, Kat...

Thanks, Robyn... The P-Vine and I were talking last night and going over the reality of having the reconstruction and I made it perfectly clear to her (perhaps in the most emphatic manner) that I don't care about it... That got her thinking and now she is leanin' on just taking that expander the heck out, healing from that and not worrying about reconstruction right now...

The doctors kinda oversell the options at the beginning and then folks are left with "buyer's remorse"... I should have remembered that from when Judy was being treated... The doctors were always saying, "Well, if this happens, we can treat it"... Yeah, it was "we can treat anything" and looking back, yeah, they "treated" her right into the grave...

So I think we'll just forget about reconstruction... It's not a priority worth half a dozen more painful "treatments"...

I was hoping that the medical profession had come along from back in the mid 90s but seems that not much has changed in that regard... I mean, these are tough choices that are laid out like some waiter telling you of the "specials" or "salad dressings"...

I wish that we had had better information 'cause it would have saved her from yet another "procedure"...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: katlaughing
Date: 25 Mar 11 - 10:18 AM

This may be a little too far out for the P-Vine, but I wanted to share it in case it helps any. My apologies to anyone who is squeamish.

One of my favourite sci-fi books of all time is Thendara House by Marion Zimmer Bradley. She had a lot of voice in her books about social issues including women's rights, warfare, etc. Anyway, when a woman chose/grew up to be an archer, she would voluntarily have her breast removed in order to be able to pull back the string to the fullest, etc. It made me cringe the first time I read it, but as I read the whole DARKOVER series and realised how brilliant they were, it made me think: if I ever had to have such a procedure, I would come to terms and feel a sense of strength and, dare I say it, pride of survival.

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: olddude
Date: 25 Mar 11 - 10:32 AM

I wish I could take it all away, I wish I could do something anything. How can one fight something we can't see, How do we fight .. when it is money we can work harder, when it is an attack we can defend how do we fight Bob ... How do we stay upright Bob .. How do we tell them it doesn't matter it is ok .. my world as yours is blow apart by this ... I wish it was me ... give it to me .. leave them alone ...

It doesn't work that way does it ... We pray we scream ... we cry .. we hold ... we love ... but seeing them go through it ... impossible hard .. anytime, anywhere, anything you need you call

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: jacqui.c
Date: 25 Mar 11 - 11:30 AM

Dan - trust me, when it is turn about and your man is suffering we feel the same way. There have been a lot of times when I have wished that it was me having to deal with the problem. Standing there on the sidelines can be torture, whoever it is.

Somehow we just have to learn to deal with these things with some kind of grace and to try and understand that what doesn't break us only makes us stronger. I adore the way that you, Bobert and Rap are supporting your ladies. Just let the rest of us support you in turn.

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Little Robyn
Date: 25 Mar 11 - 05:16 PM

Someone sent me this link when I was in the midst of my surgery - I found it helpful and inspirational.
Look here.

I'm not brave enough to do that yet.
Robyn

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Little Robyn
Date: 25 Mar 11 - 05:18 PM

Oops, that didn't work.
Robyn

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Little Robyn
Date: 25 Mar 11 - 05:30 PM

See if this works.

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Bobert
Date: 25 Mar 11 - 05:38 PM

All I see is a beautiful woman celebrating ***life***...

Nothing else!!!

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 25 Mar 11 - 10:35 PM

beauty & strength

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Lizzie Cornish 1
Date: 26 Mar 11 - 04:25 AM

Lovely photo, Robyn...I'm with Bobert on this one too..

Just sheer beauty..and a gorgeous body.

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Bobert
Date: 29 Mar 11 - 07:50 AM

Well, today is the first day since the diagnosis that the P-Vine woke up feeling at peace... Her doctors visits yesterday were more like saying good-bye and less like doctors visits and that is a good thing...

Once we get moved she'll need to hook up with an oncologists as a matter of protocol to see if there are any meds, i.e. tomoxifin, that she should take to reduce her chances of any reoccurrance...

But she is basically finished for now and it feels good...

But know that it "takes a village" and so once again I offer my heartfelt thanks to everyone here for their support, their prayers and/or their warm healing thoughts...

Bobert (and the P-Vine)

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: gnu
Date: 29 Mar 11 - 07:55 AM

"woke up feeling at peace... that's a good thing!

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: jacqui.c
Date: 29 Mar 11 - 09:27 AM

So glad to hear that darlin'. Good thoughts still coming your way.

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 29 Mar 11 - 09:43 AM

may she have many more peaceful awakings!

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: LilyFestre
Date: 29 Mar 11 - 10:02 AM

That first time of waking up feeling peaceful and not anxious, fearful or worried is SUCH a WELCOME relief!!!!!!

I'm so happy for you both!!!!!!!!!

XOXOXOXOXXOOXBUNCHESOFLOVE,

Michelle & Jeremiah

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Ebbie
Date: 29 Mar 11 - 12:15 PM

All choked up here. The love shines gorgeously bright through my computer. There have been some unhappy, unhealthy events and people in my life the last few weeks- reading and reflecting on this thread will make my day all better. Thank you, Bob, the P-Vine, Dan, Mrs. Dan, Rap and Mrs. Rap- and all the wonderful souls that write here.

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 29 Mar 11 - 12:49 PM

When my mother was using it (mid-1990s) I think they discovered that Tamoxifen stops working after about 5 years. Years have passed so adjustments may have been made to the product. Do your research and see what else is out there, if she is taking a prevention-type drug.

SRS

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Bobert
Date: 29 Mar 11 - 03:16 PM

Yeah, Tamoxifin isn't recommended for more than 5 years. Magz... My mom had breast cancer about 20 years ago and they had here on it for 5 years... She's 91 and been cancer free since...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: fat B****rd
Date: 29 Mar 11 - 03:16 PM

I moan about my arthritic knee and age stiff legs but when I read about the suffering of loved ones here and the fortitude involved... I shut up and send my best regards and thoughts as usual.
Yours humbly, fB, Charlie in Dunfermline.

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Little Robyn
Date: 30 Mar 11 - 06:52 AM

I'm glad things are going so well.
Before anyone accepts Tamoxifen, look up the side effects - I was offered that as a preventive measure, to stop any more lumps growing but I refused after I found out it can cause uterine cancer, blood clots, headaches, hot flushes, fatigue, nausea, skin problems.........
The doctors felt it would only have a 50/50 benefit and accepted my decision not to take it.
It's great as a treatment for breast cancer but I think it has too many risks if it's taken just as a preventative.
Robyn

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Lizzie Cornish 1
Date: 30 Mar 11 - 07:06 AM

Peace is such a good place to be in, Bobs...I can see us all smiling for the both of you..

Love and hugs xxx

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: jacqui.c
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 07:25 PM

How's it going melove?

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: SINSULL
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 07:26 PM

Saw your post to Dan and thought it might be time to get an update.
By now you must both be tired of "coping". How goes it, friend?
SINS

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Janie
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 07:31 PM

What Sins said, Beaubear.

Both of you are often on my mind.

Janie

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: gnu
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 07:37 PM

Yeah.... what was that on olddudes threadÉ Cough it up ehÉ

É = question mark.

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Bobert
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 08:12 PM

Well, in a nutshell, she is in a lot of pain and depressed over it...

They told her 6 weeks minimum but she must not have internalized what 6 weeks means or just how much pain is involved in a mastectomy 'cause folks in hospitals tend to sugar-coat reality... That hasn't changed since my late wife, Judy, was treated...

I mean, I don't think it's all that easy to fully prepare women for the pain they are going to have from a mastectomy...

So, yeah, it's frustrating... Here I am in the middle of a very difficult move to NC which is going to take 5 to 6 trips (2 this week) and I have a wife in a lot of pain and not a lot of tolerance for the stuff...

So that's the story... Bad timing but I gotta do what I gotta do on both fronts... Right now??? It sucks...

But it could be worse... That's the only way to look at things and not go mad...

Sorry...

B~

p.s. Thanks fir ya'll's support and caring... It really does help!!! A lot!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: SINSULL
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 08:44 PM

Hardly fair. Do those little blue pills help? I always found that they made me stupid but I still felt pain - dulled. No mastectomy. Just lots of bumps removed and biopsied.

Bobert,
If you need to, vent here in PMs to people you trust. It helps. And your remarks will go no further.
P-Vine is mourning a terrible loss. Don't underestimate your own loss.
You are both always in my thoughts and prayers.
Mary

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: olddude
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 08:47 PM

I know she has so much trouble with that drain thing. My wife hasn't yet bugged her much thank goodness but the docs told us that sometimes it can cause a lot of pain if they have to do the needle thing which is what they did on p-vine ... I am so sorry to hear she is hurting Bob ... Does she have a TENS unit. That is one of those electronic pain gadgets. if not I will see if I can dig out my old one. I know it is here someplace. They gave it to me because of chronic pain and it does work .. they are called transcutaneous nerve stimulator. They give them to chronic pain patients like me, maybe that will help I will see if I can find it

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: maeve
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 08:49 PM

Thank you for checking in, Bobert. This is a link to a well-written description of Post-Mastectomy Pain Syndrome. http://www.cancersupportivecare.com/mastectomypain.php
The authors make a strong case for patients insisting on help with pain management and describe several successful approaches.

Love,

Maeve

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Bobert
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 09:24 PM

Thanks, all....

I will try to get her to read that link, maeve...

Like I have said in the past, the P-Vine is the most "private" person I have ever known... I wish it weren't that way but it is and I can't change that... She won't call folks who have been thru this... She will, however, talk with the nurses at UVa...

I mean, I'm just kinda stuck being her "support system" while also being "Acme Movers"...

If anyone wants to switch places fir a month, PM me... lol...

B~

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: olddude
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 09:49 PM

bobster, I think you , me and Rap need a couple of jars of the good stuff with the bubbles ... not for the women folks no sir .. but for us to steady our nerves for sure ...

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Janie
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 09:52 PM

Can't switch places Bobert, but maybe can help with move.

See pm.

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: katlaughing
Date: 04 Apr 11 - 11:12 PM

Timing seems to really suck all round this year, but I know we are all going to get through it with each other's help.

Bobert, Dan, and Rap, you've all been in my thanks givings, along with your Dear Hearts. I know I haven't said much, but I have been reading along and keeping you all in mind. This too shall pass.

luvyakat

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: GUEST,Lilyfestre
Date: 05 Apr 11 - 01:17 AM

Hey Bobert,

   Is she willing to take pain meds? Keep a steady stream of them going and try to stay ahead of that pain. I'm sorry everything is fallin' on you right now my friend. If we lived closer, Pete & I would give you a hand with all that moving stuff.

    Healing is hard work. Sitting still and NOT doing for yourself and the people you are used to caring for is difficult. Getting out for even 5 minutes of sunshine can do wonders for the soul.

Love to you both!!!

Michelle

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: Ebbie
Date: 05 Apr 11 - 02:37 AM

That link is an eyeopener. I do hope the P-Vine's pain is short lived.

Thinking about you and cradling you both.

Eb

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: saulgoldie
Date: 05 Apr 11 - 06:03 AM

Sending thoughts and prayers your way.

Saul

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: gnu
Date: 05 Apr 11 - 06:18 AM

Me too.

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: wysiwyg
Date: 05 Apr 11 - 07:41 AM

Love,

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Prayers & Healing Thoughts 4 the P-Vine
From: GUEST,VaTam
Date: 05 Apr 11 - 09:10 AM

Never had surgery like this, but LilyFestre is right about staying ahead of the pain. They say the same with arthritis pain (which can be like a throbbing toothache in numerous joints). You use different combinations of pain killers at the prescribed times. GP or nurse should be able to help with the whats and hows.

As soon as she is permitted too, ice packs may be very helpful. Frozen peas in small ziplock bags work best.

As a last resort and I pray it never comes to this. If she has the lasting residual pain, many people do get accustomed to it. It has taken me 4+ years but I am more able to cope with pain this year than I have been in past.

Still praying for her quick return to good health and happy new life in North Carolina.