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Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort

GUEST,pete from seven stars link 24 May 13 - 05:10 PM
maeve 24 May 13 - 02:53 PM
billybob 24 May 13 - 02:37 PM
gnu 23 May 13 - 08:53 PM
ChanteyLass 23 May 13 - 08:07 PM
catspaw49 23 May 13 - 12:36 PM
gnu 23 May 13 - 11:42 AM
Nigel Paterson 23 May 13 - 07:23 AM
maeve 23 May 13 - 06:07 AM
billybob 21 May 13 - 07:10 AM
Nigel Paterson 21 May 13 - 06:48 AM
Sandra in Sydney 21 May 13 - 02:03 AM
billybob 20 May 13 - 06:54 PM
Sandra in Sydney 20 May 13 - 10:23 AM
GUEST,pete from seven stars link 17 May 13 - 12:53 PM
catspaw49 17 May 13 - 08:07 AM
gnu 17 May 13 - 05:57 AM
Nigel Paterson 17 May 13 - 05:05 AM
billybob 17 May 13 - 03:39 AM
Sandra in Sydney 17 May 13 - 02:54 AM
olddude 17 May 13 - 12:18 AM
olddude 17 May 13 - 12:09 AM
olddude 16 May 13 - 11:51 PM
ChanteyLass 16 May 13 - 11:23 PM
billybob 16 May 13 - 07:02 PM
KT 16 May 13 - 03:14 PM
catspaw49 16 May 13 - 01:11 PM
Pete Jennings 16 May 13 - 07:02 AM
Sandra in Sydney 16 May 13 - 05:10 AM
Janie 16 May 13 - 12:06 AM
katlaughing 15 May 13 - 10:19 AM
billybob 15 May 13 - 06:44 AM
gnu 15 May 13 - 06:01 AM
Nigel Paterson 15 May 13 - 04:42 AM
gnu 14 May 13 - 03:30 PM
VirginiaTam 14 May 13 - 03:24 PM
frogprince 14 May 13 - 02:39 PM
GUEST,pete from seven stars link 14 May 13 - 07:26 AM
Nigel Paterson 14 May 13 - 06:32 AM
ChanteyLass 12 May 13 - 10:51 PM
Sandra in Sydney 12 May 13 - 07:32 PM
AllisonA(Animaterra) 12 May 13 - 10:05 AM
Nigel Paterson 12 May 13 - 03:33 AM
ChanteyLass 11 May 13 - 07:05 PM
Nigel Paterson 11 May 13 - 08:11 AM
GUEST,pete from seven stars link 11 May 13 - 06:11 AM
billybob 11 May 13 - 04:43 AM
ChanteyLass 11 May 13 - 12:16 AM
frogprince 10 May 13 - 08:12 PM
Pete Jennings 10 May 13 - 07:03 AM
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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: GUEST,pete from seven stars link
Date: 24 May 13 - 05:10 PM

wise words maeve.

what you may feel now wendy ,does not reflect what you are - a dedicated and thankful person. God bless   pete.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: maeve
Date: 24 May 13 - 02:53 PM

Wendy,
I'd venture a guess that you've diagnosed the causes of your blues right there in your latest post. Be wary of "Shoulds"- they'll bite you without warning and in most cases have little to do with living a real life. Can you take a break?

Long distance hugs,

Maeve


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: billybob
Date: 24 May 13 - 02:37 PM

Feeling very down today, sorry folks!

Just feeling sorry for myself, I have been working on the memory book for mother but instead of enjoying delving into the past, I have got to the late 40's early 50's, so am depending on my memories now and I am feeling sad that I have lost the mum I knew then.

I should be feeling grateful to still have mum with me ,and ,of course the good news about Billy being in remission but somehow I feel in a black hole at the moment, not like me at all.

Also it is two years since we lost my father and I still feel very numb, haven't been able to grieve his loss at all? Maybe because looking after mum and Billy has taken all my time and care?

with love to all the crew

Wendy
xxxxxxx


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: gnu
Date: 23 May 13 - 08:53 PM

Yees, Spaw. A glitch, thank goodness, and things seem as well as can be for now all round. Deep breathe taken.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 23 May 13 - 08:07 PM

One foot in front of the other in spite of sorrow. Keep at it, Nigel and Ann.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: catspaw49
Date: 23 May 13 - 12:36 PM

But the news is pretty good so far for Jacqui and I just left my advice to here (Don't do this again). We'll move Jacqui up a bit for awhile. A few extra good thoughts from here can't hurt!

Good news from you too Nigel......if there is such a thing. I guess we all think at times that normalcy is no longer allowed so we hold onto the grief awhile longer. You've crossed over that divide I think and I want to tell you it is okay!

I'll be back in to touch base and update where things are with me.


Spaw


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: gnu
Date: 23 May 13 - 11:42 AM

Glad to hear some good news.

Very sad to hear jacqui is in hospital. See the thread.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Nigel Paterson
Date: 23 May 13 - 07:23 AM

Good Morning, Maeve. The Paterson section of the crew reporting for duty. All is 'ship-shape & Bristol fashion', here in East London. There is a gradual sense of 'normality' creeping back into our lives, but it's a slow, slow process.
       Still foremost in our thoughts: Spaw, Dan, Wendy & Billy, Kat, the Good Folks of Oklahoma & all of you who make up this illustrious crew.
       Go about your duties, my Dear Friends with renewed vigour,
                                  With Love,
                                                 Nigel & Ann.
                                                 xxxxxxxxxx


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: maeve
Date: 23 May 13 - 06:07 AM

Good morning, How goes the good ship and crew?


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: billybob
Date: 21 May 13 - 07:10 AM

Nigel

as usual your words convey everything we are thinking.
God bless the people in Oklahoma,

Wendy & Billy
xxxxxxxxx


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Nigel Paterson
Date: 21 May 13 - 06:48 AM

The BBC have been covering extensively the appalling tornado in Oklahoma & surrounding districts. The images & reports are almost too much to bear. Are all our American crew members ok?
                   Nothing much we can do other than send thoughts of Love & Comfort to the bereaved & injured. The thought of those children in their school is particularly distressing.
                   Standing shoulder to shoulder with all our American Friends,
                                                With Love,
                                                               Nigel & Ann.
                                                               xxxxxxxxxx


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 21 May 13 - 02:03 AM

good to know

sandra


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: billybob
Date: 20 May 13 - 06:54 PM

Sailing on......calm waters ahead.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 20 May 13 - 10:23 AM

refresh


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: GUEST,pete from seven stars link
Date: 17 May 13 - 12:53 PM

thoughts and prayers dan,from one who lost his mum last year and feels the pain.with reference to a certain other thread,-dont let them drag you down toward their level.you are a much better man than them and i,m sure will do your mum proud.   pete.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: catspaw49
Date: 17 May 13 - 08:07 AM

Thank you gnu.....well said. Sums it for me too. We love you Dan.......


Spaw


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: gnu
Date: 17 May 13 - 05:57 AM

Dan, my friend... it can't be said any better that the above posts have said it. Anyone who has read your thread or your posts herein knows her heart her spirit, as well as yours, are true and good.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Nigel Paterson
Date: 17 May 13 - 05:05 AM

Wendy, I can but echo your words; so eloquent & full of love & compassion.
Dan, your posts convey so clearly your pain & distress. Be strong in public if you feel that's what's needed, but make some private space for yourself. Every tear you shed is a measure of the Love you felt for your Mother & she for you & your Family. Talk, cry, remember, laugh, talk some more, cry some more, remember things & times you thought were long forgotten. The Carousel of Grief does eventually begin to turn more slowly.
      Wendy's right when she says: "The most loving and supportive group of people sail on Jane's Rainbow...."
      We're here when you need us,
                                                   With Love,
                                                                  Nigel & Ann.
                                                                  xxxxxxxxxx


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: billybob
Date: 17 May 13 - 03:39 AM

Dan,

your mum would have be so proud of you, remember all the love and fun you shared, I have been reading on the other thread just what a wonderful lady,and very funny, your mother was.

Please know that those tears will come and you can share them on the Rainbow! The crew here share all our sadness as well as our joys.The most loving and supportive group of people sail on Jane's Rainbow,

Sail with us, share with us,we will listen
sending you love and comfort

Wendy and Billy
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 17 May 13 - 02:54 AM

love & hugs, olddude to you & your family

sandra


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: olddude
Date: 17 May 13 - 12:18 AM

If there is one good thing it is no regrets. Mom never hung up the phone without hearing whoever was on the other line saying "I love you Mom" or I love you Grandma. She knew it and heard it all the time. That I am so thankful for .. never ever stop telling those you love that you love them .. never stop ... And like Mom always said, words are important but deeds speak even louder .. don't say it .. show it. Never go to bed without saying "what have I done right today"


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: olddude
Date: 17 May 13 - 12:09 AM

My daughters are taking it hard. They adored their grandma. They say I am a rock ... no I am not. I just can't afford to lose it .. all that does it make them hurt even more .. I refuse to lose it .. so I rely on my faith .. for me and Mom, that has always worked for lifes turmoil.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: olddude
Date: 16 May 13 - 11:51 PM

Mom wrote us all a letter - each one of us before she died. It was beautiful ... but ripped my heart out. She said she was blessed to have such wonderful kids. I still can't cry ... I think I just hurt so much that stuff inside shuts down ...

tough week. I will be fine , like her I am a man of faith. But boy does it suck. She was everything to all of us. Loved loved kids .. any kid .. could do no wrong. Young neighbor girl would bring her toddler twins over to see mom. The little people's feet would not touch the floor cause mom would be carrying them .. Love kids, loved her family, loved God ... strong feisty woman who never hurt anyone in her life. The first there when anyone was in trouble and the last to leave. Never had money but certainly had what counted in life. I could never ever live up to the bar she set for us to follow.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 16 May 13 - 11:23 PM

I'm sorry about Jane's father-in-law. That is more heartache too soon. My love to you and all of your extended family who are mourning again.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: billybob
Date: 16 May 13 - 07:02 PM

Up Spaw!

sending love

Wendy xxxx


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: KT
Date: 16 May 13 - 03:14 PM

Checking in after being away for a bit ~ sending loving thoughts and caring to all of you who are struggling right now. Truly, holding you all in heart and mind as I go up into the mountains today. KT


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: catspaw49
Date: 16 May 13 - 01:11 PM

Sorry I'm not posting as much but things are a bit tough right now and don't get into long stuff right now.

Nigel and Ann.....Don't know what to say except to send hugs and good thoughts. And to the rest of you in this crew, forgive me. Hemoglobin and red blood cell count has dropped but on the best possible note, at least it has been about 2 months since the last transfusion which was MUCH longer than before. More Vidaza next week......

Sailing on and happy to be aboard!


Spaw


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 16 May 13 - 07:02 AM

Still here.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 16 May 13 - 05:10 AM

special love & hugs to Jane's husband & children, Nigel & Ann & families & friends.

sandra


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Janie
Date: 16 May 13 - 12:06 AM

((((((((hugs)))))))))

Janie


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: katlaughing
Date: 15 May 13 - 10:19 AM

perhaps her f-i-l didn't like her going alone or he needed some extra help from her? Either way my condolences to all of the families.

uvyakat


/


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: billybob
Date: 15 May 13 - 06:44 AM

Dear Nigel and Ann,

sending out love and thinking of you and Jane's family,
you are in the hearts of all the Rainbow crew,and we are always here.

with much love

Wendy and Billy
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: gnu
Date: 15 May 13 - 06:01 AM

Oh my.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Nigel Paterson
Date: 15 May 13 - 04:42 AM

Tamara, every one of your heartfelt words make perfect sense. Beautifully expressed. A shared experience which reminds me, yet again, we are not alone.
Gnu, thank you for making me laugh. Humour, once more in short supply. We learned last night that Jane's Father-in-Law has died. We had rather hoped that Death had moved out of our neighbourhood, but it would appear s/he's not done with us yet. 2013...those last two digits are beginning to live up to their superstitious reputation.
             Bowed, but unbroken, we send Love to You All,
                                                                                     Nigel & Ann.
                                                                                     xxxxxxxxxx


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: gnu
Date: 14 May 13 - 03:30 PM

Nigel... "Celebrating & Grieving simultaneously...not easy, but we're going to give it our best shot."

Reload and fill the air fulla lead!

Sorta like priase the lord and pass the ammunition but a bit closer to my home.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 14 May 13 - 03:24 PM

So sorry, Nigel. I have been mostly absent from Mudcat lately so missed the sad news. I don't know if I can offer any real comfort. I don't know if I found it for myself since losing my daughter (age 23) in 2005.

What I can say with the passing of time (so the saying must be true about it healing all wounds) I feel the anger, outrage, disillusionment, sorrow a little less robustly now. The moments of despair are fewer and further between. And I have been able to find some joy in memories and in doing things I know my Andie would have loved. I just consciously ask her to come along and imagine how she would engage with these events.

But then I get a punch in the gut like this morning. Just after talking with TSO about getting the videos of Andie's concerts onto DVD before the VHS tapes disintegrate, BBC R 4 played a little clip of Pachelbel Canon in D. That snip was used in the opening of something Andie sang in high school Bach to Rock choir concert. A full blown memory flooded back of her smiling face, singing, hair style and the clothes she was wearing. I just fell apart on the drive into work. I have not looked at the videos since before she passed away. I cannot bear too. Yet I remembered every detail of that little bit of the the concert. And I counted it a blessing that I could remember it in such detail.

There may be times when your future will be peppered with these kinds of memories. Even the tenor of your feeling about them will probably change as mine has.

I hope my rambling here, offers you some comfort. If not, please just ignore it. Every person must grieve in the way that most suits them.

Sending you and your wife much love.

Tamara


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: frogprince
Date: 14 May 13 - 02:39 PM

Tomorrow at this time we will be well on our way to Maui. Actually by Hawaii time we will be about there by this time. We won't be taking anything connectable except a cell phone, so you probably won't hear from me for approx 13 days. With what this bunch has come to mean to mean, I won't be forgetting you all in the meantime.

          Dean


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: GUEST,pete from seven stars link
Date: 14 May 13 - 07:26 AM

yes,it is hard to get fired up too much on celebrations so soon after a loss.my 60th was soon after mum died and i did,nt do the party till september ,but i think you are right to carry on despite the sadness and wish you a great time.blessings    pete.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Nigel Paterson
Date: 14 May 13 - 06:32 AM

Wishing everyone on board a very Good Morning from a rather overcast East London (We're good at 'overcast' in the UK!)
       Our trip to NC hangs in the balance. The flight costs have really rocketed. The cheapest fare we've found so far (round trip for two) is in excess of £1500.00!! travelling 'restricted economy'. The only carrier who can fly us direct is US Airways; neither of us is keen to make stops. Our NC based daughter is looking at booking for us, but she is encountering similar prices. As our lovely son-in-law would say: "Drat & double drat!"
       It's Ann's birthday on Thursday, so a nice lunch on Thursday & tickets for 'Top Hat' (The musical) on Friday. Celebrating & Grieving simultaneously...not easy, but we're going to give it our best shot.
                     With Love to You All,
                                                    Nigel & Ann.
                                                    xxxxxxxxxx


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 12 May 13 - 10:51 PM

Thank you, Sandra.

Nigel, I wish I could get to North Carolina to meet you and Ann. Then I could give you real hugs instead of virtual ones. If you ever get to Rhode Island, or even New England, or if I ever get to the UK again, I'll try to meet you.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 12 May 13 - 07:32 PM

love to ChantyLass's family

sandra (back to the oars)


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 12 May 13 - 10:05 AM

Oh, Nigel, how I wish I could! I live over 1000 miles away from NC, and have a very busy May and June, but will be thinking of you!

I'm still here, but it's May. Not here as often, but think of you all every day.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Nigel Paterson
Date: 12 May 13 - 03:33 AM

Ann & I will be in Charlotte NC in the not too distant future. We wondered whether any of you who live within striking distance would like to meet?. PM me for the details & we'll take it from there.
                               With Love to You All,
                                                             Nigel & Ann.
                                                             xxxxxxxxxx


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 11 May 13 - 07:05 PM

Thank you, Nigel and Ann.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Nigel Paterson
Date: 11 May 13 - 08:11 AM

"I still can't imagine what it is like to have a child die first. None of us expect that."

       ChanteyLass, our hearts go out to you & your Family. Your words ring painfully true.
       Sending you Much Love & holding you in our thoughts,
                                                                                           Nigel & Ann.
                                                                                           xxxxxxxxxx


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: GUEST,pete from seven stars link
Date: 11 May 13 - 06:11 AM

i remember how devastating it was when i lost my brother in 1990 .amazingly my mum and dad gave up smoking at that time despite their grief.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: billybob
Date: 11 May 13 - 04:43 AM

Sending love to your cousin and her family, no words can mend the shock and grief,

Wendy xxxxxxxxx


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: ChanteyLass
Date: 11 May 13 - 12:16 AM

Indeed, it is that kind of crowd. And I'm part of it.

I went to a wake tonight. One of my cousin's son was walking with his wife and another woman along a sea wall in Gloucester, Massachusetts, when a wave swept him and the other woman into the sea. His wife called 911, but the Coast Guard and local police could only retrieve the bodies. My cousin, of course, is devastated as are her daughters and her son's widow.

I still can't imagine what it is like to have a child die first. None of us expect that.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: frogprince
Date: 10 May 13 - 08:12 PM

I'm stiil popping my head up on deck and looking around each day.


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Subject: RE: Jane's Rainbow: for all needing support & comfort
From: Pete Jennings
Date: 10 May 13 - 07:03 AM

"Mr. Jennings"! I'm honoured, Janie!


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