BS: Teccnical terms used by singers/musos

Subject: Teccnical terms used by singers/musos
From: Steve Parkes
Date: 26 Nov 99 - 08:04 AM

If you've ever come across a book called "The meaning of Liff", you'll know what I'm getting at, where British place names become adjectives ...
What I have in mind is things like:
  DADGAD: an expletive used by guitarists in moments of passion. "Dadgad! I've broken a string!"

Further contributions would be welcome.

Lexicographically,
Steve

Subject: RE: BS: Teccnical terms used by singers/musos
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 26 Nov 99 - 11:07 AM

Terpsichorean - that gooey grey/white gunge found on paint brushes that have been left in a pot of white spirit or turps, rather than being washed properly, and are now consequently, useless.

Harmonium - The guy who leans out of his window at 2.00am to complain about the singing in the pub car park.

Euphonium - The guy at the agents office who get the job of calling people to explain why they aren't getting any gigs.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Teccnical terms used by singers/musos
From: SeanM
Date: 27 Nov 99 - 01:09 AM

How about Bodrahn: (pr:Bow-ron) The old distinctly non musical gent in the pub, who after his 53rd beer starts explaining how he's the missing Clancy brother...

M

Subject: RE: BS: Teccnical terms used by singers/musos
From: catspaw49
Date: 27 Nov 99 - 01:16 AM

Are you saying a kind of musical "sniglet" like thing Steve?

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Teccnical terms used by singers/musos
From: Alice
Date: 27 Nov 99 - 10:10 AM

Forte - Like foray, The sound made at any grand entrance like a cavalry charge leaving a fort (the only volume known to pipers and trumpet players)

Subject: RE: BS: Teccnical terms used by singers/musos
From: Mike Robertson
Date: 27 Nov 99 - 09:45 PM

Farnham: the slight communal indrawing of breath heard when the fifth bodhrán player joins the session.

Sandwich: an invention discovered as a partial antidote to a Farnham (q.v.)

Deal: the process of offering a Sandwich (q.v.) to a bodhrán player in order to avoid a Farnham (q.v.)

(My only excuse for this piece of idiocy (apart frpm being a serious Douglas Adams fan) is that these are all real placenames in England that I've lived in...:-)

-mike-

Subject: RE: BS: Teccnical terms used by singers/musos
From: Roger in Baltimore
Date: 27 Nov 99 - 11:03 PM

My brother sent me these:

Musical Terms Misunderstood by Country-Western Musicians

DIMINISHED FIFTH - an empty bottle of Jack Daniels
PERFECT FIFTH - a full bottle of Jack Daniels
RITARD - there's one in every family
RELATIVE MAJOR - an uncle in the marine corps
RELATIVE MINOR - a girl friend
BIG BAND - when the bar pays enough to bring in two banjo players
PIANISSIMO - "refill this beer bottle"
REPEAT - what they do until they just expel you
TREBLE - women ain't nothin' but
BASS - the things you run aroun in softball
PORTAMENTO - a foreign country you always wanted to see
CONDUCTOR - the man who punches your ticket to Birmingham
ARPEGGIO - "ain't he that storybook kid with the big nose?"
TEMPO - good choice for a used car
A 440 - the highway that runs around Nashville
TRANSPOSITIONS - men who wear dresses
CUT TIME - parole
ORDER OF SHARPS - what a wimp gets at a bar
PASSING TONE - frequently heard near the baked beans at barbeques
MIDDLE C - the only fruit drink you can afford when food stamps are low
PERFECT PITCH - the smooth coating on a freshly paved road
TUBA - a compound word: "hey, woman! Fetch me another tuba Bryl Cream"
CADENZA - that ugly thing your wife always vacuums dog hair off of when company comes
WHOLE NOTE - what's due after failing to pay the mortgage for a year
CLEF - what you try never to fall off of
BASS CLEF - where you wind up if you do fall off
ALTOS - not to be confused with "Tom's toes", "Bubba's toes", or "Do-ri-toes"
MINOR THIRD - your approximate age and grade at completion of formal schooling
MELODIC MINOR - Loretta Lynn's singing son
12-TONE SCALE - the thing the State Police weigh your tractor trailer with
QUARTER TONE - what most standard pickups can haul
SONATA - what you get with a bad cold or hay fever
CLARINET - name used on your second daughter if you've already used Betty Jo
CELLO - the proper way to answer the phone
BASSOON - typical response when asked what you hoped to catch
FRENCH HORN - wife says you smell like a cheap one when you come in at 4 am
CYMBAL - they use on deer crossing signs so you know what to sight in pistol
BOSSA NOVA - the car your foreman drives
TIME SIGNATURE - what you need from you boss if you forget to clock in First
INVERSION - grandpa's battle group at Normandy
STACCATO - how you did all the ceilings in you mobile home
MAJOR SCALE - what you say after chasing wild game up a mountain, "Damn! That was a major scale!"
AEOLIAN MODE - how you like Ma's apple pie
BACH CHORALE - the place behind the barn where you keep the horses

Big RiB

Subject: RE: BS: Teccnical terms used by singers/musos
From: John in Brisbane
Date: 28 Nov 99 - 06:50 PM

Excellent BS, thank you Roger.