BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?

Subject: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: SPB-Cooperator
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 06:27 AM

Came close to a run-in with an Audi driver yesterday - because someone had the audicity to overtake him at traffic lights, because the overtaking car was in a queue of traffic the A***HOLE in the Audi decide to brake hard to pick an argument with the other driver. Yours truly in turn did an emergency stop, putting myself at risk of being shunted from behind - luckily didn't happen.

Upshot I am now of the belief that everyone who owns an Audi, for the safety of everyone else on the road must be automatically banned for life.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Stu
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 06:53 AM

Yes. Also: Beamer drivers, any non-utility landrover drivers and farmers.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Will Fly
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 06:59 AM

Oh dear - I've been driving Audis for over 35 years and never had an accident or altercation in or with one. Bit harsh, to say the least...

Moral: Don't extrapolate personal grievances into universal ones.

[Mind you, I'd ban BMW drivers as well... :-)]

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Stu
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 07:29 AM

Also: Bentleys, Aston Martins, Skoda drivers (me, I have no real aptitude for driving and find cars dull), herring, badgers (being chased by irate farmers foaming at the mouth that any indigenous wildlife still survives in the UK), backwoodsmen descended from friends of The Bastard, horse flies, sticks that stick up and clatter your undercarriage, Einstein-Rosen bridges floating on the breeze, mallards and those small spiky things that the dog brings in.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: SPB-Cooperator
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 07:32 AM

The problem is that bad drivers (I don't mean those who make mistakes, but those who deliberately drive badly) tend to gravitate towards Audi's and BMWs. A friend posted on facebook this week about a mother who was bottle feeding a baby with one hand while struggling to control her Audi in the middle lane of a dual carriageway with the other!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 07:47 AM

We are both safe, steady and 'positive' drivers, keeping up to the speed limit but not doing anything suddenly. Never had any accident or fine in forty years. (Insurer's dream!) But we are often tailgated/overtaken on dangerous bends, and it's usually by an Audi, BMW or Mercedes, usually black in colour. On can only draw conclusions from what one observes.
Not only do they overtake, but some of them then sit in front going more and more slowly in order to annoy us. We generally pull over and park until they buzz off.
We conclude that these makes of cars are expensive and showy, and capable of fast speeds (illegal, as our roads here are single-carriageway, so 60mph is the limit) so their owners want to cut a dash.
However, cutting a dash behind the wheel is dicing with death.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: SPB-Cooperator
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 07:56 AM

I think programmes like top gear that make bad/inconsiderate driving funny, or 'cool' add to problems. Driving at speed doesn't appeal to me, miss so much scenery and picturesque villages that can be enjoyed on the b-roads.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 08:13 AM

Rural roads have quite a high rate of fatalities.
Here one can come across tractors, huge combines-harvesters, horses, deer, people on bikes, pony-trotting enthusiasts, almost anything. And they can be just around a bend in the narrow road.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 11:04 AM

Volvo estates - why has no-one mentioned THEM!


What's the difference between a hedgehog and a Volvo estate?

With a hedgehog the pricks are on the outside...


And what about motor homes and caravan-pullers - should all have to pay £20,000 per annum road tax and spend six months out of every twelve in jail.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 11:15 AM

Strangely enough Steve, we find Volvo drivers to be fairly considerate and restrained! (Just a general impression; I'm sure there are pricks inside some of them)
You made me laugh about caravan-pullers. I don't agree though. Six months out of twelve in jail is not enough.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 11:38 AM

And they should DEFINITELY not be allowed to park their confounded, ugly big white monstrosities in their drives for all their neighbours to suffer for fifty weeks of the year. Grrr.

So, Senoufou, you have a Volvo estate, I presume...😂

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Megan L
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 11:40 AM

I once overtook a male driver he then overtook me and braked violently and continued to drive normally for a bit then brake suddenly even when I stopped for a few moments at the side of the road on a long straight stretch he was to engrossed in his silly game to realise what I was doing. He seemed really stunned when the police flagged him down as we entered the ferry car park. I cant after all these years remember what he was driving so I vote all male drivers should be banned.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Will Fly
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 12:10 PM

Bugger - I seem to fail on all sides!

My wife drives the 14-year-old Audi - and I drive the 30-year-old Volvo 240 Estate.

I'll get both me coats...

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: G-Force
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 12:55 PM

I tow a caravan. So speed isn't an issue for me. I reckon if every driver of a German car towed a caravan, they'd learn that you still get there just the same, and almost as soon.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 02:26 PM

No no Steve. I have a little Fiesta. (It goes like a bomb though, plenty of acceleration) and my husband drives a Vauxhall Meriva.
We have no motorways in Norfolk, and most of our roads are single carriageway, most with 50mph speed limits, but some are 60mph, and all of them twisty and bendy.
Not the place to be stuck behind a tractor.
And not the place to have an aggressive Audi right behind one's rear end either!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Kenny B (inactive)
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 03:26 PM

BTW how does one pronounce the word "Audi" is it as on "ow-di"
or is it as in "Noddy"
Is the German pronounciation a form of snobbery after all we wouldnt pronounce Audible as owdible

My German car dealer neighbour used to have steam coming of his ears
when I used to ask him if he had "wan o they noddy cars"
Just a thought

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 03:32 PM

Hahaha Kenny. I always say 'ow-dee'. But then I often take the Mickey out of Seat cars and pronounce it Seet (as in somewhere to sit)
I always call BMWs 'Beamers'. But my very, very naughty neighbour says it stands for ...er...Black Man's Willy!!!!!! But then she's like that :)

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: SPB-Cooperator
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 03:59 PM

In Czech, au is pronounced ow, so the word for car is pronounced owtoe.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 05:05 PM

The correct pronunciation of Audi is "twatmobile." I thought everybody knew that!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: JHW
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 05:09 PM

Of course a Seat is a seat but no-one yet has been able to tell me what Cee'd is an abbreviation of

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 05:32 PM

JHW, I believe the South Koreans took the initials of 'European Economic Community' and added 'European Design'. They then took away one of the E's and came up with Cee'd. Sounds like a name designed by a committee to me!
I hate those stupid little Ford Ka's. "Oh look! There's a Ka!" (as opposed to a bicycle I imagine!)

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 05:38 PM

Yes, and there are certain vehicles which have names that permanently preclude me from ever driving one. I will not be seen dead driving anything called a Partner, a Berlingo, a Twingo, a Charade, a Jimny, a Touareg (who the hell thought that one up!), a Juke, a Qashqai (could never ask for one because I can't pronounce it) or a Megane. But the very stupidest car of all time must be the Picasso. I mean, what the hell do you think you look like getting into one of those! I swore blind that I would never be seen in one of those ludicrous Smart Cars, the ones that look like a cut 'n' shut but without the shut. Then, one day, I had to drive one home ten miles for an old lady who'd been taken ill. You know something, that car wasn't half bad...

Nah. I'm a socialist and I'm sticking to my beaten-up Ford Focus. I'm not telling you what Mrs Steve drives. Suffice to say, it has two seats only and many a hairdresser drives one. And I love it!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 05:47 PM

Well, Senoufou, the Ka is indeed ludicrously named. However, I had to borrow one for a week a while back while my driver's door was being rebuilt after a force ten gale blew it violently open, wrecking it completely. I found it to be remarkably spritely and perky, a joy to drive. Also, I've noted that Ka drivers seem to be predominantly rather gorgeous young women. So I'm giving the Ka a bye at this juncture. I'll keep you posted.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 06:28 PM

I did actually test-drive one once Steve, before I settled for a Fiesta.
It wasn't bad at all for performance, but the boot is tiny and I need some room for plants, bags of compost, cat-baskets and other gubbins from time to time, so I plumped for the Fiesta.
Does anyone else name their cars? I've had all sorts of names. My present one is Misty. (It's a female, but I've had male ones too)
Once a car-dealer looked at me a bit strangely and asked how I knew a car was male or female. I replied that the first time I sit in a car, it tells me its name. He sort of backed away looking round for help...

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Jack Campin
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 07:27 PM

I find feuds between car drivers of very little interest.

They're all selfish fuckwits with a grandiose sense of entitlement to a lifestyle of grotesque waste, and they can all just go kill each other as far I'm concerned.

Any car is a weapon of war against the future. You hate your descendants enough to condemn them to grubbling around through garbage in a burning world for anything they can still use out of your midden?

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 24 Sep 16 - 09:01 PM

I am about as good at identifying different cars as I am about recognising individual ants.

They get you around. At present they come in different colours, and a few different shapes. That's just needlessly confusing. We'd be better off if there were just say, three different models, small, medium and large, all built the same way.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Megan L
Date: 25 Sep 16 - 07:00 AM

My Mr Campin it must be great to be perfect wonder how you would manage as a disabled person in an area with a hopeless bus service but then you are so busy showing us how righteous you are you don't give a damb about people.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 25 Sep 16 - 07:45 AM

We have no bus service at all in our village. I'm too old to cycle, and my husband needs his car to get to work. We could I suppose buy all our food online, but then a vehicle would have to deliver it.
I'm afraid we both need our cars. Believe me, if there were an alternative we'd grab it with both hands, as running two cars is horrendously expensive and troublesome.
We have actually considered moving into the city, but houses there are much more expensive and we couldn't afford to buy one. That's why we opted for our little village.
Not every car owner is a monster bent only on polluting the planet.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Kenny B (inactive)
Date: 25 Sep 16 - 08:42 AM

Well said Mr Campin I'm an ardent admirer of written vitriol, best to get it off yourt chest, but I don't agree with a word of it
We all Fiddle while Rome burns?
Where would we be without the 'lectricity damming our rivers harnessing our wind and waves.
Come to think of it I think Ned Ludd would have been knighted if he was alive today, now there's a thought

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 25 Sep 16 - 09:40 AM

It's three-quarters of a mile to the main road from my house and there's no safe place for a bus to stop up there. Not that there are that many buses anyway, a few per day, all at daft times, and you can't get back home. I can get two or three buses a day to the nearest large towns (all between forty and sixty miles away), but getting home again having had a sensible length of time in your destination is a nightmare. Dr Beeching saw to it that rail travel is nobbut a distant dream. No cars would mean a completely depopulated countryside, one which has long had its viability undermined in any case by said depopulation. It's a choice, I suppose.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 25 Sep 16 - 04:34 PM

A policy of no cars for anyone living in a city, with appropriate exceptions (eg people with mobility problems) would make sense. Sensible city dwellers have abandoned using cars already.

Decent public transport everywhere would make it possible to cut down car use. Living in a smallish town I never dream of going by car if there's an adequate alternative. I do about 2,000 miles driving in a year. I'd sooner do a crossword or read or look at the scenery than concentrate on not getting killed.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Mr Red
Date: 25 Sep 16 - 04:36 PM

You wait till there are more driverless cars on the road. Knowing that car has to avoid another vehicle, how do you think your "Audi" driver is going to treat the driverless car?

In a TED talk by Goggle, trying to sell the concept of driverless cars they showed a video from one with another in front. In a stationary queue the gap between is programmed to be safe and big enough for the idiot to creep in between. The idiot had spotted an opportunity.

Now tell me a more moronic driver, who values his arrival time more than his bones, isn't going to rely on the driverless car stopping. And misjudging the ability of radar, lidar and ten cameras all with algoritms, on having enough safety margin in the face of arrogance.

I have a video of a Merc coming out of a sideroad to get a clearer view of the exit in front of my right of way, without stopping. Driver holding a phone to his ear.

It is about time we stopped calling incedents accidents.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 25 Sep 16 - 05:12 PM

Ha Mr Red! My husband and I have that discussion often. I say there's no such thing as a road 'accident', as someone was driving badly to cause it. He maintains that 'things aren't always someone's fault'.
I say yes, they always are. He seems to think stuff just 'happens'. We never seem to reach a conclusion. (Rather like another thread on here!)
One of us must be a Troll... Or a Flamer...

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 25 Sep 16 - 05:15 PM

Well I suppose we should call them incidents.

You must live in one of the Essex outlying villages then, Kevin, as Harlow itself is a somewhat sprawling place, hardly what we Cornish denizens would call a smallish town. I lived in Loughton for eight years and did most of my big shopping in Harlow, remember. Almost landed a job at Stewards but the governors showed bad taste. On the whole, I tend to think that many city-dwellers (including those in smallish towns which have relatively amazing bus and rail links) haven't a bloody CLUE what it's like living out in the sticks (boondocks, yanks?). Nearest railway station to me is an hour's drive. Buses are infrequent and totally inconvenient. We pay a damn sight more for petrol than you townies and our council tax is astronomical compared to yours. Still, at least we can always stare at the sheep and inhale the lovely pong of pigshit.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 25 Sep 16 - 05:32 PM

Well, Senoufou, we are all human beings. No-one decides to fall off a ladder or trip up on the pavement, or eat dodgy salad in order to get food poisoning. It's so easy to get all sententious and declare that "every so-called accident is someone's fault." I dropped a cup of tea on the floor this afternoon. I suppose it was my fault. I tripped on my stair carpet last week and still have the scabbed-over graze on my knee to prove it. My fault. Do you think that either outcome is what I wanted? Just because someone gets behind a wheel it doesn't make them a demon if they have an accident. Circumstances alter cases. Most accidents are caused by driver error, which can mean a momentary lapse of concentration or a poor snap decision. Just a few are caused by lunatics, ignoring the law about using mobile phones, drinking or by inexperience. As a society we could do a lot to fix those things, but we tend to put our priorities elsewhere.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 25 Sep 16 - 05:35 PM

Well it's true we spend a fortune on petrol, but our council tax is apparently the lowest in the land. (And I quite like staring at sheep and inhaling the smell of pig poo!)
I would certainly use the buses, as I've had a bus pass for years and years, but rarely get to use it. There's talk of getting a bus 'service' (we use the term loosely) from our village to a not-very-nice little town (not Norwich sadly) which would give us exactly 2hrs before we had to catch the return bus. But even this hasn't materialised yet.
I used to bike around, but I'm much too old now.
We have no Post Office/bank or even an ATM. Our village shop is tiny and only sells a few things. I really do feel we're justified in having our cars. It would be impossible to continue living here if we didn't.
On balance though, I adore village life and the quiet countryside. I couldn't exist in a town, I'd suffocate!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Mr Red
Date: 26 Sep 16 - 03:26 AM

Not all road incidents come from errors of judgements. There is metal fatigue, which if you read police statistics, is rare to the point of insignificance. Then there is the state of UK roads (even motorways) - see metal fatigue. Punctures. BUT.......... we are talking maintenance surely AND ..............

Acts of god like lightning (metal cars are a Faraday cage, you are safe, the car may stall). Floods, but there is judgement involved.

Then, as if white stuff and your breath in the air doesn't inform people of potential danger - we could blame the weather. But I won't.

Then there is the other guy, it always is.

And hands free phones are safe, no? NO! 70% of the danger (American survey in the New Scientist) comes from the way we visualise the person on the other end, detracting from essential attention to the road. The 30% is the way people fiddle with the phone - like texting.

No I would accept that the cavalier way councils and private individuals refuse to "maintain their borders" and allow vegetation to cover road signs; and it is getting worse. Drivers panic, make late decisions and sudden manoeuvres (or maneuvers in the US). So anything after that is the council's fault? But accident?

Did I miss any other excuse?

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 26 Sep 16 - 03:47 AM

Hahaha Steve, my husband would love you! Those are the very arguments he puts forward. Maybe you're both right and I'm misguided.

However, dropping a cup happens because one hasn't gripped it properly.
And dodgy salads are the fault of the person who prepared them.
Falling off a ladder is particularly dangerous and rather a sensitive subject for me, as a man in our village (quite a close neighbour) fell off his ladder recently outside his house and when the Air Ambulance arrived, he was dead (head injury). And it was because he hadn't secured it correctly, or at all.
Tragic, but true nevertheless.
There are in my view very few incidents where no-one was at fault. But I can give an example. My sister was called out to attend to a woman up in the wilds of Scotland. A huge wild red deer had leapt in front of her car in the dark and its horns had broken the windscreen and pierced the lady's chest cavity. She later died, poor soul. I don't think that could have been avoided.
Actually, I think I would make a very good Insurance Loss Assessor - I wouldn't be paying out a penny, hard-hearted person that I am!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 26 Sep 16 - 03:59 AM

By the way Steve, I'm intrigued that you've found Ka's to be driven by 'gorgeous young women'. I might get one as my next car, and await the transformation. My husband would definitely be very pleased!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Raggytash
Date: 26 Sep 16 - 12:23 PM

I like Volvo estates, jump in, fire up the engine, select your choice of gear for the day and off you go.

We had a Volvo C70 convertible in White, that would set off in third gear and you'd still be in third gear when braking the national speed limit.

Great car.!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 26 Sep 16 - 02:04 PM

No, I live in Harlow itself - I see it as smallish because I grew up in London. Dispersed rather than sprawling I'd call it, neve far from the shos wherever you live in it - though the bus service was wrecked by privatisation.

I agree real accidents where no one is at fault are pretty rare events. Even when wild animals are involved the chances are the driver should have really been going slower. More often than not where two or more drivers are involved they'll all have played a part in the accident. You should always drive on the assumption that other drivers are going to do something incredibly stupid.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Donuel
Date: 26 Sep 16 - 02:31 PM

http://www.cartalk.com/sites/default/files/blogs/jim-motavalli/images/road%20hog%20chart.jpeg

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Donuel
Date: 26 Sep 16 - 03:00 PM

I've got a Mercedes Benz with MD plates I have no trouble finding dates
I've got a 1980 Subaru, one more semester then I'm through
A Slant-6 Dodge is no big thrill but it's a car no atom bomb can kill
I make a lot of dough in a high-tech job, yeah sure you bet I drive a turbo Saab
I'll bet you a ten, even a fiver, you find the car and I'll find the driver
It really ain't no big deal to know who's inside that automobile
Well I've just airbrushed my Econo-line, "A friend of the devil is a Friend of Mine"
I've got a 1962 Biscayne it won't start if it looks like rain
A four wheel drive with extra chrome I keep it on the paved roads close to home
Cadillac the size of an Amtrak train when I drive I take two lanes
Now my Honda civic is a real go-getter, I look great in it in my crew neck sweater
And my BMW draws applause, I am not bound by traffic laws
I got a Ranger truck, I'm for import quotas, I won't park next to no Toyotas
My Volvo wagon will seat six, it'll run on diesel or trail mix
I'll bet you a ten, even a fiver, you find the car and I'll find the driver
It really ain't no big deal to know who' the driver

Morrissey 2013

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: BobL
Date: 26 Sep 16 - 03:22 PM

If I were dictator, to apply for a car driving licence you would first need to have a full motorbike license and at least two years accident-free experience. That should eliminate a lot of idiots right at the start.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: BobL
Date: 26 Sep 16 - 03:36 PM

And what's more, road rage would be a license-costing offence.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 26 Sep 16 - 05:30 PM

Naming cars? No, but I do invent various means of remembering registration by acronyms.
Various past ones include - DRT ---Y - Yes, it was usually dirty!
--- GGD Goody Gum Drops
SK--- WWD Wild West Doc
ST0- LNK Stolen Kar
SK-- GXP Great EXPense
LD13 XXX Lethal Dose 13
None of these was an Audi,but the worst driving I saw recently was from some twit in an underpowered Dacia who decided to overtake me at very great time duration on a blind summit in West Lothian: he would have been minced if anything had come the other way!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 26 Sep 16 - 05:38 PM

Oh Tattie! My funny friend took one look at one of my Fiestas years ago, with the reg no. TVG and immediately said "Transvestite Granny!"

I absolutely love your Goody Gum Drops!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 26 Sep 16 - 06:26 PM

Not sure about that idea BobL It might cut down on the number of people driving, but they'd all be bike riders... Which tends to mean a bit crazy in the first place.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 26 Sep 16 - 06:39 PM

Hahaha! I can't really see me astride a motorbike! Supergran!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 26 Sep 16 - 07:37 PM

My son had a reg plate on his Cinquecento that included "MBW." We christened it My Big Willie. Once we'd tuned into that, it was amazing how many plates we spotted that ended in "...BW." So we spotted a good few Awfully Big Willies, Disgustingly Big Willies, Extremely Big Willies, Horribly Big Willies, Lovely Big Willies, Massively Big Willies, Suntanned Big Willies, Terribly Big Willies, Unusually Big Willies, and, of course, F*****g Big Willies. I'm ashamed to say that we still play that game with reg plates after more than 20 years. Passes the time during my frequent sojourns on the M5 and M6.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Mr Red
Date: 27 Sep 16 - 03:36 AM

towards the bottom of this page there are some photos of car registration plates seen in Stroud. Plus other vehicle related pics.

One I have yet to get is of a blacked-out Chelsea Tractor* with the registration A1 8ODY. I bet the driver of that is anything but a ripped hunk!

*What the UK calls a 4X4 - Chelsea as in London, the only mud there has to be washed and dried before placing in the trash.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Teribus
Date: 27 Sep 16 - 04:19 AM

"the worst driving I saw recently was from some twit in an underpowered Dacia who decided to overtake me at very great time duration on a blind summit in West Lothian: he would have been minced if anything had come the other way!"

Two pieces of advice I once heard being given by a Superintendent (Traffic) in Leicestershire:

1: Never call in the police to attend any no injury accident in the belief that they will ensure you get the other drivers insurance to pay all as it was "his/her" fault - In such a case the police will almost invariably charge both drivers {One with dangerous/careless driving, the other with driving without due care and attention)

2: Covers the situation described in the quote above - If someone is overtaking you, as the driver of the car being overtaken it is simple common sense in the interests of safety to let the overtaking driver complete the manoeuver as quickly and safely as possible.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 27 Sep 16 - 04:23 AM

I remember my old driving instructor (donkey's years ago) telling me the same thing. If anyone ever overtook us during my lessons, he'd say, "Off petrol! Off petrol!" in order to allow them to get in front quickly and safely.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Mr Red
Date: 27 Sep 16 - 06:35 AM

Now what do you do with tailgaters and someone squeezing in - into the (un)safe margin you have manufactured. At (say) speed limit 40mph across a set of traffic lights? The squeezer is exceeding the speed limit and is about to jam his brakes on as he runs out of his side of the road.
My reaction if I know the road is to pre-empt the situation by taking the space before he arrives, but it is a judgement and not always possible with multiple idiots.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 27 Sep 16 - 08:59 AM

That's the sort of situation I dread Mr Red. Either one moves forward (to tailgate the person in front) or endures the lunatic whizzing along beside one towards oncoming traffic. Either way, the risk of a collision is there.

As an elderly woman who often drives alone along fairy remote country roads, I find these things are very intimidating. In addition, there's no mobile phone signal around here, so I don't even possess a phone to call for help.

I've had someone menace me by driving right behind my tail, then overtaking, only to sit right in front of my bumper. I am always doing the speed limit, not dawdling, but it seemed this chap just wanted to scare me. (He succeeded!) I didn't get his number as I was concentrating on not hitting him. (Perhaps I should have done!) but anyway, the Police wouldn't take my word against his. It was an Audi....

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 27 Sep 16 - 10:23 AM

Teribus: 2. I was not racing the overtaker, but on that stretch of road there was nowhere else for me to go other than keep straight on - or end up in a field! I am still gobsmacked that the driver (of a very low-powered car) should even consider overtaking as being a sensible manoevre at that point, which has been the site of other fatal accidents in the past.

Oh, and on registrations, there used to be a large estate car going about, advertising a pets' crematorium: the reg was something like RIP DOG.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 27 Sep 16 - 10:51 AM

I just wish that people who want to saunter along would look in their mirrors occasionally. Pull over and let the convoy pass. It never happens. Some of us just want to get a move on. I have to sit behind the wheel for so many hours trundling up the A30, M5, M6, M62 and M60 and back to visit my elderly parents that I do not appreciate anyone who protracts journeys for me by driving at 39mph on a 60mph road.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: SPB-Cooperator
Date: 27 Sep 16 - 01:00 PM

Years ago driving home via Kings Lynn, I was in a position two cars were occupying both sides of the, and neither dropping back to let the other pull in putting me in the unenviable position to either deliberately run myself into a ditch, or slam my breaks on and hope for the best. I must have done the latter, which was ptobably the wrong choice as I wouldn't have been here today if I had been in a head on collission. For some odd reason, the authors of the highway code haven't bothered to advice drivers what to do in this situation. Out of interest, with reference to Teribus' if I had of been in a colission and survived, what would the police have charged me with?

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Mr Red
Date: 27 Sep 16 - 02:23 PM

Apparently there is a road sign instructing drivers, common in the US for these situations:

"Like a Zip"

But is it common to be obeyed?

If everyone obeyed it would all run smoothly. But there are greedy people who believe: "the meek shall inherit the earth, but THEY DON'T WANT IT!"

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 27 Sep 16 - 02:31 PM

SPB my parents many many years ago had exactly this happen to them, and in the same area. My father was an exemplary driver with a spotless history. Two cars were heading straight for him head-on and he had nowhere to go. He had to swerve off into a ditch, and the resulting crash was very serious. The overtaker disappeared over the horizon. My mother was hurt very badly and was rushed to Pilgrim Hospital in Boston. She was unconscious for hours, turned black all over with the bruising, and had to stay in hospital for days. My father had a bad leg injury, treated in A&E. Their car was a complete write-off.
The Police took a statement, and said they were lucky to be alive.
Luckily there were witnesses in the cars behind, who stopped to call an ambulance etc. It was all horrifying.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 27 Sep 16 - 08:16 PM

Sorry to hear this, Senofou, but glad that your parents survived such a terrible ordeal. Those who appear to criticise anyone else's driving - in a verbal forum, FFS, (including a couple of posters above!) were just not there at the time, and I just wonder how they would have reacted given the same situation!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 28 Sep 16 - 03:46 AM

It's terrifying isn't it Tattie? It sounds as if you, like me, drive positively and up-to-speed but safely and non-aggressively. That may not always be enough to keep us out of danger.

My father used to say one drives according to one's character. If one is an aggressive, impatient person, it will show. If one is sensible, patient and responsible, that's how one drives.

I'm just so thankful we have no motorways here in Norfolk. From what I see on TV, that's where the racetrack mentality really comes into its own!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 28 Sep 16 - 05:32 AM

Keep your distance. Make space around you.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 28 Sep 16 - 06:35 AM

That's right Steve. But some people on the road feel that they must impress, jostle, dominate and show off. None of which makes for a safe driving strategy.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Will Fly
Date: 28 Sep 16 - 08:12 AM

I remember my BSM driving instructor telling me (1971) to "drop back and leave plenty of space between the car in front and us". And, if a car nipped in to that empty space? "Drop back and leave plenty of space between the car in front and us"... ad infitum.

Which I do to this very day.

Still amused by the signs on some motorways which say, "Keep two chevrons apart". I always imagine two small goats having a scrap and me having to sort them out.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 28 Sep 16 - 08:21 AM

Hahaha Will! I particularly like the words on crossing patrol people's lollipops : 'STOP CHILDREN!' As an ex-teacherI agree entirely. Children should be stopped at every opportunity.

We also have a warning sign in our village : 'SLOW HORSES!' I often wonder why they don't just go a bit faster...

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Will Fly
Date: 28 Sep 16 - 08:23 AM

And the old favourites:

Potatoes Pull In
Heavy Plant Crossing

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Raggytash
Date: 28 Sep 16 - 10:19 AM

Just as an aside Senoufou, I recently attended a naughty drivers course (got caught speeding for the second time in over 40 years driving !) The instructors maintained that motorways are the SAFEST roads on which to drive.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: leeneia
Date: 28 Sep 16 - 10:27 AM

He's probably right. On a motorway, if a dangerous driver appears, you can usually move into another lane. (You lose this advantage, however, if you do what most people do and join a pack of cars close together.)

The two-lane highway, on the other hand, is known as the killer highway.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 28 Sep 16 - 10:32 AM

I've heard that Raggytash, and I suppose it must be true. But when I did Prison Visiting all over the place, I was terrified on the motorways, especially the M25. Every few minutes we all had to change lanes to the right, to let in the joining traffic, then move back to the left. People were horribly aggressive and at speeds of 70mph it was frightening. Also, despite my attempts to stick to 70, people were obviously furious and wanted me to do at least 90!
Maybe I'm just out of practice, pottering around our gentle Norfolk roads. But you're right, the statistics say that rural routes have more fatalities.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: SPB-Cooperator
Date: 28 Sep 16 - 05:29 PM

Latest Audi report - was driving with an audi behind me. When I gave way at a roundabout, audi driver decide to overtake me, straight onto the roundabout and force another driver already on the roundabout the swerve ri avoid colliding with said audi driver - very much a near miss.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 29 Sep 16 - 04:37 AM

I learned to drive over 50 years ago: 5 lessons with an "instructor" who turned up with a different car each time: different numbers of forward gears (3 or 4 in those days) , reverse and indicators in different positions. Then my Dad took over, and I drove around with him for at least another year before taking my test: passed first time.
Best piece of advice my Dad gave me: "never believe the other bugger knows what he's doing, or that his indicators mean what they say".

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Charmion
Date: 29 Sep 16 - 08:47 AM

We have just returned home after our annual trip from Ottawa to West River, Maryland, for the FSGW Getaway. The full journey of about 950 km can be done in one day but really shouldn't. Almost all of it is multi-lane, controlled-access highway, so one has the illusion of efficiency, but the hours of constant close attention in a visually bleak environment are very tiring.

England has the most hazardous routine driving conditions I have ever encountered in some 40 years on the road in Canada, Europe and the United States. The cramped, cluttered verges of the roads make it unnecessarily difficult to see joining traffic, pedestrians, cyclists and other vulnerable beings. The higgledy-piggledy layout, planned by the rolling English drunkard and frequently punctuated by roundabouts, made my Canadian head ache. And the aggressive behaviour of the average British driver sometimes terrified me. I felt safest on the M4, where the traffic moved at close to 80 mph but at least in a fairly predictable way.

My dear old sergeant and his assistant, the ancient master corporal, taught me to drive as if everyone else on the road was a homicidal maniac out to get me. I guess they had driven on English roads at some point.

BTW -- Why does every lay-by have a Ford Transit van parked in it?

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Stu
Date: 29 Sep 16 - 10:24 AM

"The higgledy-piggledy layout, planned by the rolling English drunkard.."

Or planned in bits over 14,000 years as we like to think!

I loved driving in the US, wide open freeways and little traffic to contend with. Driving across Wyoming towards the rockies with the radio blaring out "Runnin' Down A Dream" by Tom Petty was as close to happiness whilst driving I've ever been.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Teribus
Date: 30 Sep 16 - 02:06 AM

The US has a population roughly five times that of the UK. For every person killed on British roads roughly sixteen are killed on roads in the USA.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Will Fly
Date: 30 Sep 16 - 03:37 AM

The WHO data for 2015 - compiled in 2013 - gives the road accident fatalities per 100,000 head of populations as follows:

Sweden - 2.8 (lowest)
United Kingdom - 2.9 (second lowest)
USA - 10.6

For accidents per 100,000 motor vehicles, the associated figures are:

Sweden - 4.7
United Kingdom - 5.1
USA - 12.9

Total fatalities were:

Sweden - 272
United Kingdom - 1,827
USA - 34,064

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Will Fly
Date: 30 Sep 16 - 03:41 AM

Oh, and equivalent data for Canada:

6.0
9.5
2114

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Teribus
Date: 30 Sep 16 - 12:33 PM

Thanks for the information Will.

So it would appear that UK's roads are not as lethal as those in Canada or those in the USA.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Penny S.
Date: 30 Sep 16 - 06:13 PM

Round here is a road, originally designed by the idiots who thought it was a good idea to have three lanes - eastwards, westwards, and overtaking in the middle. Not for nothing was it known, until the locals wanted its old name back, as Death Hill, for it showed up on the police accident map as a dense mass of black pins.
Now, Gorse Hill, it has two lanes, eastwards, westwards, and a hatched section down the middle, which as anyone who has read their Highway Code knows, means no one is supposed to enter it.
But there are some, and I don't usually get to see which make they are, who carry on as if we were back in the days of the three lanes, and steam up the centre because the traffic doing 60 (the local limit) is much too slow.

BTW, when I was in Norway, an idiot did something stupid in front of the coach we were in, on the packed ice, and without thinking, I said, "what do you expect from a BMW", and it turns out the Norwegians feel the same about BMW drivers.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 30 Sep 16 - 06:37 PM

Two pieces of advice I once heard being given by a Superintendent (Traffic) in Leicestershire:

1: Never call in the police to attend any no injury accident in the belief that they will ensure you get the other drivers insurance to pay all as it was "his/her" fault - In such a case the police will almost invariably charge both drivers {One with dangerous/careless driving, the other with driving without due care and attention)

2: Covers the situation described in the quote above - If someone is overtaking you, as the driver of the car being overtaken it is simple common sense in the interests of safety to let the overtaking driver complete the manoeuver as quickly and safely as possible.

That's consistent with my comment that in most accidents both parties have some responsibility.   A good way of helping identify how that should be shared, and also those cases where one party is enrirely blameless, is the introduction of dashboard front and rear video cameras.

The most recent accident involving my car was the exception - the car was parked in a car park while I was at a choir practice. Came out to find it shunted forward with the rear smashed, and a note on the windscreen saying "Sorry - my door flew open and I hit your car. Please phone my Mum." (Car got written off, with the quoted price from the insurers for repairs £3,500, so they paid me £2,000 - and I bought it back for £400, and got it repaired perfectly for £650. It isn't only drivers who jack up the cost of insurance by phony claims, garages do their own bit to inflate costs. But that's another story.)

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Rusty Dobro
Date: 01 Oct 16 - 06:29 AM

Back to the OP:

Little Audis, little Audis, little Audis on the motorway,
Little Audis in the car park, and they all look just the same.
There's a silver one, and a silver one, and a silver one...and a silver one,
And they all stay in the fast lane, and they all look just the same.

And they're driven by accountants and surveyors and solicitors,
Who wear Raybans and Rolexes and they all look just the same,
And they park them at the golf club or the yacht club or Masonic hall,
In a neat line of Audis, and they all look just the same.

They've got MP3's and cruise control and an infotainment facility
Because that's what the neighbours have and they want just the same,
And a screen in the dashboard that helps them to navigate
Just as far as the outside lane, and they all do just the same.

And they sneer at Hyundais and Nissans and Citroens
But the sight of an HGV seems to drive them insane.
If they can't get past they drive too close and they flash their lights and they beep their horn,
But it does them no good and they're held up just the same.

Little Audis, little Audis, little Audis on the motorway,
Little Audis in the car park, and they all look just the same.
There's a silver one, and a silver one, and a silver one...and a silver one,
And they all stay in the fast lane *, and they all look just the same.

* I know it should be called the overtaking lane, but it doesn't scan....

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Charmion
Date: 01 Oct 16 - 10:29 AM

Will Fly, do you have stats broken down by number of miles driven?

Canada and the United States are similar in that road systems are built primarily for motor vehicles, and most communities sprawl; population density is typically low. Public transit is scanty and expensive, and walking to and from work is simply not an option for a hell of a lot of people.

Many accidents (incidents, really) around here arise from driving too fast in marginal weather conditions. Add a daily commute of 50 to 100 km each way and perhaps a beer after work, and bad things are bound to happen.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Will Fly
Date: 01 Oct 16 - 11:37 AM

Yup. Fatalities per billion vehicle kilometres driven:

Sweden - 3.5
UK - 3.6
USA - 7.1
Canada - 6.2

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Greg F.
Date: 01 Oct 16 - 12:00 PM

Part of the high U.S. numbers are down to peoples' addictions to monster, heavy-weight, 8-cylinder SUV's and "Sport Pickup Trucks" which can, and do, inflict more damage and mayhem than reasonablye-sized vehicles.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Bill D
Date: 01 Oct 16 - 12:49 PM

Mr Red said: "Now what do you do with tailgaters and someone squeezing in - into the (un)safe margin you have manufactured."

Then leenia said: "
The two-lane highway, on the other hand, is known as the killer highway."

The scariest thing I ever saw was many years ago when a friend & I were driving across Montana, USA. We were crossing very wide valley where they had constructed a "cut & fill" 2 lane highway. It was maybe 3 miles of a very tall upside-down V with a road on top. There was a long string of cars going West..... I was in about the middle of the line, leaving about 2-3 car lengths behind the one ahead ..while 'most' of the cars were bunched up to just over one car length..(we were only going 45-50 MPH on that scary stretch- no guard rails and a LONG way down).
I happened to glance in the outside rear view mirror, and to my horror saw a car WAY back at the end of the line pull out and come barreling down the line of cars! He must have been going 85-90 MPH! I glanced ahead and saw several cars coming the OTHER way appear in the distance. Before I could yell "Oh, NO!" this idiot passed me, hit his brakes, slipped into the barely sufficient space in front of me just as the 3 cars (probably scared to death) passed going the other way! Then he pulled out again and accelerated back up to 80-90 again, passed a dozen more cars, and disappeared into the distance.
   If I had been as close to the car in front as most of the others were, something terrible would have happened. I'd like to think the idiot would have just driven off the edge... but he probably would have forced me or someone near me off instead...or just braked and hit the oncoming cars head-on.
   No, I didn't think to get a tag number.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 01 Oct 16 - 01:42 PM

Good grief Bill, that's the sort of experience that gives one nightmares for evermore!
We've often 'saved the bacon' of various young motorcyclists stitching along behind us, overtaking, then urgently begging for a space to duck into when approaching traffic appears. I always try to drive 'defensively' and give way if pressed, so as to avoid collisions and accidents.
We so often meet with drivers who seem to have no indicators on their cars. Especially on roundabouts. If only folk would indicate, one could advance onto the roundabout. But one just has to wait until they turn off or continue round. Also there are the "Hahaha fooled you!" brigade, who indicate one way then turn the other.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Teribus
Date: 01 Oct 16 - 02:05 PM

"I happened to glance in the outside rear view mirror, and to my horror saw a car WAY back at the end of the line pull out and come barreling down the line of cars! He must have been going 85-90 MPH! I glanced ahead and saw several cars coming the OTHER way appear in the distance." {At this point Bill D should have immediately started to brake to leave an obvious and bigger gap in front of him that the overtaking car could see} Before I could yell "Oh, NO!" {Yelling "Oh, NO! achieved exactly what Bill D?} "this idiot passed me, hit his brakes, slipped into the barely sufficient space in front of me just as the 3 cars (probably scared to death) passed going the other way! - Ehmm No Bill D the lead driver of the car in the oncoming traffic instead of pointlessly yelling anything probably started braking as soon as he saw the car coming towards him.

If someone is overtaking you, you should do everything in your power to let them do so as quickly and as safely as possible.

Very old US TV Series starring Broderick Crawford called Highway Patrol at the end of each episode there was a road safety tip - the only one I remember went something like this:

"Remember folks when driving it's not who's right but who's left".

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 01 Oct 16 - 03:42 PM

Oh Teribus, was that the one where the policeman always said "Ten-four!" when he received a message?

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 01 Oct 16 - 03:42 PM

Oh Teribus, was that the one where the policeman always said "Ten-four!" when he received a message?

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 01 Oct 16 - 05:59 PM

"Here lies the body of Jonathan Day
Who died defending his right of way.
He was right, dead right, as he rode along,
But he's just as dead as if he'd been wrong."

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Bonzo3legs
Date: 01 Oct 16 - 06:24 PM

On a narrow road the trick for dealing with an aggressive Audi driver behind you is to wait until there is a line of cars coming in the opposite direction, then pull in. The driver will then have to wait until that line of cars has passed before he/she can overtake you !!!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Bill D
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 12:04 AM

Ummm... Teribus... I did not actually yell "Oh no"... that was literary licence. Nor did I make ANY attempt to deny him a safe place to escape... and as far as I could tell, those oncoming cars were still perhaps 300 yards away... but the idiot could NOT have continued without hitting the lead car. My 3 car space was the ONLY thing that prevented some sort of sad incident... all this happened within about 10-15 seconds...5-6 seconds for him to be beside me, 4-5 seconds inside the safe zone, then a few more seconds as he sped on his merry way.

and BTW..."Bill D should have immediately started to brake... "

I am not stupid and I stay aware of my status on the road... there was another car directly behind me... far too close for any 'immediate braking'. If I had, *I* might have caused a collision. I 'may' have reduced my speed a wee bit by less pressure on the gas, but I simply did not process that bit of data in the few seconds I had....

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 03:03 AM

That's the trouble isn't it Bill? Having to assess in a split second the sudden dangers that present themselves. One needs instant reactions and constant vigilance. That's why I firmly believe that elderly folk should be assessed regularly for their capability to react swiftly when driving.
I'd be quite happy to undergo such a test, and to accept the findings. If it was felt I should surrender my licence, I would do so with good grace.

Every time we exit our village and enter the main road, we pass a very sad little wooden cross nailed to a tree, where a young motorcyclist met his death. A motorist pulled out without looking, his bike wasn't seen approaching and the resulting crash was horrific. His poor family put the cross there and lay flowers at the scene every year.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Teribus
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 05:09 AM

I would suggest then Bill D that if you are recounting an event that actually happen then in your description just stick to the facts and detail what you did and leave "literary licence" to the writers of fiction.

In a close moving line of cars - you said 40-50mph - you would have been perfectly safe applying light pressure to the brake pedal (Your brake lights come on before your brake pads make contact with the discs). Doing that would have let the overtaking driver know that you were aware of the situation and that you were making room for him, just by easing off on the accelerator he would have no idea at all of any of that.

Back in the days before car radios became fancy down in the West Country we were taught a trick to prevent aggressive "tailgaters". You tuned your radio off station until you only had static, you then turned down the volume until the static was barely audible. Set up like this if you depressed the brake pedal you would hear an audible click when your brake lights came on. So if someone did come up behind you and pressed you from behind you pushed the button to this preselected "station" and put your foot on the brake pedal, your brake lights came on but the car continued at the same speed, the tailgater could be seen falling astern fast as he applied his brakes. At the next suitable section of road you then let the clown pass in safety - far better to have someone like that up ahead of you than behind.

Those who get my goat on the road are drivers of tractors, mobile homes and caravan towers who never bother to check what is happening behind them. In some parts of the world it is an offence to allow more than six or seven vehicles to pile up behind you. The driver of the tractor, mobile home or caravan is required to pull over and let traffic flow. It happens as a matter of course in Norway throughout the summer, in the UK it is so rare an occurrence that it is almost unheard of and all it is, is a complete and utter lack of consideration for other road users.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 05:23 AM

Our county is largely agricultural, and I have to say our tractor drivers are fairly good about pulling over. However, there aren't many lay-bys or pull-ins for them to do so. I always try to be patient as they have their work to do. At the moment it's maize silage. Tractors and trailers everywhere, heading for the bio-energy methane-production sites. Later it'll be sugar beet (massive heavy trucks heading for Cantley). We've finished, thank goodness, with the huge combines!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Will Fly
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 05:49 AM

Most of the drivers of large agricultural vehicles in our part of Sussex are pretty good about pulling in where they can temporarily to allow a build-up of other motorists to get past. Personally, I don't mind tractors, however slow they are, because they are, after all, just doing their job. If you live in the countryside, it's part of the deal...

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: SPB-Cooperator
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 09:59 AM

A disastrous outcome was avoided by Bill D doing as a do, and dropping back a bit. However, if Bill D hadn't of provided that space, how were the on-coming drivers expected to ensure their own safety? I have been an oncoming driver in a similar situation driving south of Kings Lynn as I originally mentioned in this thread - not so much a case of barreling down a line of slower moving traffic, but an idiot trying to overtaking another idiot, and both refusing to drop back. And instead of barrelling the other idiot Bill D refers to should only overtake when there is a sufficient space in front of the vehicle being overtaken and there is sufficient road visibly free of oncoming vehicles to complete the maneuver.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Donuel
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 10:33 AM

I've got a Mercedes Benz with MD plates I have no trouble finding dates
I've got a 1980 Subaru, one more semester then I'm through
A Slant-6 Dodge is no big thrill but it's a car no atom bomb can kill
I make a lot of dough in a high-tech job, yeah sure you bet I drive a turbo Saab
I'll bet you a ten, even a fiver, you find the car and I'll find the driver
It really ain't no big deal to know who's inside that automobile
Well I've just airbrushed my Econo-line, "A friend of the devil is a Friend of Mine"
I've got a 1962 Biscayne it won't start if it looks like rain
A four wheel drive with extra chrome I keep it on the paved roads close to home
Cadillac the size of an Amtrak train when I drive I take two lanes
Now my Honda civic is a real go-getter, I look great in it in my crew neck sweater
And my BMW draws applause, I am not bound by traffic laws
I got a Ranger truck, I'm for import quotas, I won't park next to no Toyotas
My Volvo wagon will seat six, it'll run on diesel or trail mix
I'll bet you a ten, even a fiver, you find the car and I'll find the driver
It really ain't no big deal to know who's the driver of that automobile.
In heavy traffic my Audi fits in, even if the space is only paper thin.

Bill D preserve your space no matter how many cars keep stealing it.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Bill D
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 10:36 AM

All I can say is.... I saw him coming, I was careful NOT to deny him space, and I didn't do anything sudden or impulsive. It has always been my practice NOT to tailgate other cars. That was the one time it was driven home how important that is.

My real point was just to recount how dangerous other drivers can be.


Oh... I once had an Audi (LS-100) for a couple of years. It wasn't a very good car, so my plans to get a personalized tag for it never happened. It would have said "DUDI"

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Raggytash
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 11:02 AM

One technique I use for tail-gaters is to (first check there is no-one behind the tail-gater) then briefly switch on my rear fog lights. No change in my speed but it make the tail-gater apply their brakes and back off a bit. ......................... repeat as necessary.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Bill D
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 11:03 AM

Reference was made above to drivers of expensive cars like BMWs...etc... who seem to graft the value of their car to their personality. They are problem enough trying to dodge ( no pun intended) them in traffic, but one seldom actually meets one. I had that dubious pleasure in a parking lot.

I used to have a Dodge van... one of the very large 15 passenger type.

like this


Before that I had driven VW vans for years, and had become very good at parking vehicles with a snub nose. I pulled into a grocery store lot and found a parking space. As I entered, I noticed a woman standing beside the drivers door of the car opposite me. I eased up closer, as my van needed to be well into its space so as to not stick out in the rear. The lady waved her arms and looked agitated. When I got out (having parked 'about' 8 inches from her newish black sedan (it may have been a BMW...or a Cadillac...or a Lexus... I wasn't paying attention), she said "I thought you were going to hit me!"

I said mildly, "No I'm careful..."

She glared and replied, "Well it worried me... this car is worth $45,000! What's yours worth... about $8000?"

I'll swear that's almost an exact quote.... I couldn't think of a thing to say. I just shook my head and went into the store, wondering whether IF I'd had an expensive vehicle to match hers, it would have been OK to bump her a bit... Later I wondered whether she thought that ALL drivers of older 'cheap' vehicles thought that she was fair game....

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: SPB-Cooperator
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 11:18 AM

Well the answer is, "yes I should be concerned that you are obviously such an awful driver you might back your heap of crap into my van when you leave"

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 12:49 PM

If someone is too close on my tail I am more likely to slow down than speed up.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Bonzo3legs
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 12:54 PM

Absolutely McGrath, nothing annoys an Audi/BMW maniac more than having to keep to the speed limit!!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 05:53 PM

It's true that owners of Audis, Beamers and Mercs are always on the alert for anyone scratching or marking their pride-and-joy. Us plebs in our pitiful Vauxhall Meriva for example.
If we're parked next to one of these gems, I always slide out of my car door like an eel, trying not to even touch their bodywork with my coat.
I can always read their thought bubbles though:-
"Hey! You toucha my car, I slappa your fice!"

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Charmion
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 07:25 PM

You're right to be careful, Eliza.

About a year ago, I witnessed a road rage incident in which a pair of lads walking home from work were attacked by the driver of a bright red sports car. He had blocked the pedestrian crossing, the better to make his right turn as speedy as possible, and one of the young fellas -- the tall, skinny one with the unicycle -- knocked gently on the offending fender as he walked around the nose of the car. The driver leapt out, grabbed the lad, and punched him in the face, yelling, "I'll f***ing kill you!"

It happened at the foot of my street, less than 100 metres from my front door, just as I stepped out on my way to a meeting. I took the lads to our house, gave them tea and called the cops, who came and took statements -- including mine.

Months later, I was summoned to the cop shop for a "photo line-up". For this procedure, a meticulously conducted double-blind affair, I was shown photographs of 12 amazingly similar men. Alas, I was no help, having seen the assailant only from the side, in low light and at a distance of about 50 metres.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 02 Oct 16 - 08:16 PM

Well in the last two weeks, just over, I've driven over 1500 miles on UK motorways (and, for a week of that, I was in Sicily!). I have just three rules: first, keep your distance. Second, the middle and outside lanes are for overtaking only. My default lane is the inside lane. Third, if you're being tailgated, just pull over. These people are dangerous.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Mr Red
Date: 03 Oct 16 - 04:04 AM

Keep your distance. Make space around you.
Yea, Yea. For the idiot who thinks that space is for taking, and he does. The meek shall inherit the earth! but THEY DON'T WANT IT!"

Stopping on a pedestrian crossing. Take a photograph - see how they react. The last time this happened to me I pointed to the traffic lights as he moved. I watched as he crawled forward, it was not total oblivion to anyone else but the car in front. "Can't see the red light mate"! He stopped for me but I doubt he thought he was in the wrong, just unlucky.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 03 Oct 16 - 04:32 AM

It's very annoying but it's a fact of driving life. If it makes you nervous then perhaps you should give up driving. Aggression, unfortunately, is an irrevocable part of human nature. In any case, on our congested roads you sometimes have to take what very limited chances you can to change lanes.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Senoufou
Date: 03 Oct 16 - 07:26 AM

Good grief Charmion, what a dreadful thing to do - punch someone in the face, when the driver was in the wrong being on a pedestrian crossing in the first place!
I don't agree Steve that aggression is an irrevocable part of human nature. We're civilised human beings not wild animals, and if someone is incapable of controlling their aggression they certainly shouldn't be in charge of a car (or even at liberty at all!).

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 03 Oct 16 - 08:23 AM

But they are in charge of cars. That is the reality and it always will be. Unfortunately, aggressive drivers are often skilful drivers and know how to avoid trouble. Only when something disastrous happens will they be removed, and, 99% of the time, nothing disastrous does happen. You can fume all you like about these monsters of the road but unless you can live with them you should be considering your position. Nervous or slow drivers on crowded roads are a menace too.

By the way, irrevocable was not the word I typed - it was more like irreducible, something like that. The autowotsit changed it for me. Also, l lost a longer post on this that I haven't got time to do again now.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 03 Oct 16 - 09:17 AM

It was about people who nip in from the left (from the right in the US I guess) into the safe space you've left between you and the car in front. I was coming home from London along the M4 and M5 yesterday and this was happening a lot. This is rarely bad driving. You just have to take your chance, and you should be judged on whether you signalled your intent in good time, avoided wing-mirror blind spots and promptly let the gaps open again once in the new lane. The road is shared space and does not belong solely to you. Several times yesterday I got stuck behind some moron hogging the middle lane and had to do a quick dive to the right to get past. A timely signal that the outside lane driver could see and a moment to allow him to drop back a bit is all it takes. I do suspect that some people who whinge about that kind of situation are being either arrogantly territorial or are simply too nervous to be on the road. More dangerous behaviour by far on fast roads are tailgating, lane-hogging, weaving undertaking and dawdling.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Donuel
Date: 03 Oct 16 - 09:26 AM

Number one on my list of arrogant drivers are already stopped at a red light but manage to pull into your lane and stop again, limiting your braking distance by a car length. When two or three do the same, a collision can be imminent.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 03 Oct 16 - 09:26 AM

"If someone is too close on my tail I am more likely to slow down than speed up."

Hmm. If you do that in order to teach him a lesson, you are indulging in behaviour no less dangerous than his. The best policy is to let him pass at the first opportunity. If that isn't possible for a while, you're justified in slowing down only in order to leave more stopping space in front of you so that, in an emergency in front, you can stop more gradually in order to lessen the chance of the eejit behind ploughing into you.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 03 Oct 16 - 11:13 AM

If you're experiencing problems with an Audi driver, just go to the Audi website and see if there's an updated version of the driver you can download. It works for Epsons.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 03 Oct 16 - 01:23 PM

I slow down because at a slow speed a collision is less serious, and the stopping distance is less. And it also makes it easier for the driver to overtake. If there's a layby handy I'll likely stop and let any impatient drivers move on.

I agree trying to punish bad driving by the way you drive is bad driving in itself, and stupis. So is using a horn to tell people off, rather than for it's proper purpose, which is solely to ensure another driver knows you are there in case they've failed to notice. One of the bad consequences of driving badly is that it is in fact likely to provoke others to drive badly.

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 03 Oct 16 - 01:32 PM

Grand.

Subject: Should all Drivers be banned?
From: Donuel
Date: 03 Oct 16 - 07:48 PM

In a couple years we will blame AI

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Raedwulf
Date: 04 Oct 16 - 02:16 PM

"Volvo estates - why has no-one mentioned THEM!"

"Cheers, Raedwulf. I know you'd take me to pieces without demur were I to get beyond meself, and that's exactly how it should be."

Oh dear, Mr Shaw, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. Apart from a brief, less than happy, dalliance with a 440 (bloody stupid Bendix gearbox!), I've been driving Volvo estates for a quarter of a century...

{evil grin}

;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 04 Oct 16 - 04:53 PM

Well since this thread has drifted to include just about all drivers of just about all vehicles, a few observations from the last 2 days spent driving around the beautiful island of Mull, where many of the roads are "single track with passing places". Nothing vehicle-specific as far as I could see, unless you count the wee white Fiats and Minis who seem to think they should be able to slip through anywhere. So who stops? Who backs up? Who looks far enough ahead to anticipate passing issues? Most people were well-behaved, with the exception of one woman in a "Chelsea tractor" who stood her ground and would not back up about 20 yds into a passing place, whereas my husband had to reluctantly go back several hundred yards to let this belligerent woman through, who then did give a leery smile!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Raedwulf
Date: 05 Oct 16 - 05:57 PM

I wouldn't have. I'd have switched the car off, got out, walked up, pointed to said passing place, told her how far behind me the next one was & then politely (well, less than politely, probably) invited her to either reverse or to sit there all day...

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 05 Oct 16 - 06:38 PM

Love it, Raewulf! Yes, should have done that!

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Doug Chadwick
Date: 06 Oct 16 - 05:31 PM

Having read through the whole thread, I am struck by the number of polite, thoughtful, considerate, careful drivers we have here on Mudcat. Perhaps there is a correlation between folk music and good driving. I wonder why we have such nasty, aggressive arguments on so many other subjects.

The older I get, the more I try be polite, thoughtful etc. but, even though I don't drive an Audi, I have to admit to not always getting it right. I will try harder in the future and keep my eyes open for those Audi and BMW driving, non-Mudcatters who cause all the trouble.

DC

Subject: RE: BS: Should all Audi Drivers be banned?
From: Will Fly
Date: 06 Oct 16 - 05:43 PM

Ah well, you know what they say, Doug - everyone thinks they're:

the perfect lover
the perfect manager
the perfect driver



...


and the cheque's in the post!